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  1. #1
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    Default is this insensitive - comment from MCHN

    This is my second post regarding comments by others regarding my c section. I am working through my issues around the fact my birth was not quite what I had planned throughout my pregnancy and now my focus is just my beautiful bub.

    I haven't dwelled on this one because frankly I am too busy but i thought this was an odd conversation as part of a presentation at my first mothers' group.

    MCHN - hands up if you had a c section.

    2 hands out of 10 go up.

    MCHN- oh only 2, well that is so great because we know the c section rates can be much higher.


    I thought that comment was odd. Or maybe it's just me!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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    no, just factual.

    C section rates are increasing...and it was just an observation.

    In my mothers group, i was the only one out of 8 that had had a natural birth!

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    Quote Originally Posted by acerbaby View Post
    This is my second post regarding comments by others regarding my c section. I am working through my issues around the fact my birth was not quite what I had planned throughout my pregnancy and now my focus is just my beautiful bub.

    I haven't dwelled on this one because frankly I am too busy but i thought this was an odd conversation as part of a presentation at my first mothers' group.

    MCHN - hands up if you had a c section.

    2 hands out of 10 go up.

    MCHN- oh only 2, well that is so great because we know the c section rates can be much higher.


    I thought that comment was odd. Or maybe it's just me!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Aww hugs, I'm sorry things didn't go the way you expected! I think it's tricky because I'm sure she wasn't making any kind of comment on any one persons C section, more a general observation based on the issue of disproportionately high rates as a whole which are kind of scary, but if that 1 in 10 happens to be you it would feel a little rude and confrontational I think!

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    I wouldn't worry. C-sections are going up because there is more technology to show complications. I had an emergency Caesar and if I didn't I would have died. Im so greatful in the advances in medicine. There may be a rise in Caesars but there is a decrease in deaths at birth. Anyone who judges you has no understanding of everything you go through. A friend judged my process because I didn't have skin to skin right away, she had no idea how lucky I was to hold my baby in my arms. I wouldn't change it for anything.

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    Not rude to me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by missie_mack View Post
    Nope not rude but I understand that it is a sensitive issue for you and that it could make you feel as though it is
    This is basically what I was going to say.

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    But to say "great"? I think that's out of line. It's not always by choice, I had a C-section not by choice and the guilt after that I couldn't deliver my baby naturally was intense. Try not to let it get to you - although that's easier said than done.

  10. #8
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    I think her implication was rude, insensitive and unprofessional.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mathermy View Post
    Aww hugs, I'm sorry things didn't go the way you expected! I think it's tricky because I'm sure she wasn't making any kind of comment on any one persons C section, more a general observation based on the issue of disproportionately high rates as a whole which are kind of scary, but if that 1 in 10 happens to be you it would feel a little rude and confrontational I think!
    I also think this was the sort of general observation that she was making, not an attack on anyone.

    Quote Originally Posted by Hulahoop View Post
    But to say "great"? I think that's out of line. It's not always by choice, I had a C-section not by choice and the guilt after that I couldn't deliver my baby naturally was intense. Try not to let it get to you - although that's easier said than done.

    Whilst great wouldn't have been my first choice of words, I don't think she meant its "great" that 8 women "chose" a vaginal birth, but more that it's great that for this group there was a 20% Caesar rate (for whatever reasons) which is less than the national rate. More a comment on society, but definitely not a comment on individuals.

    im pretty bad at explaining myself......

    edit: to try and help myself lol, I work on a busy birth suite. I would describe a shift where there is no emergency Caesar as "that's great, no one needed a Caesar". It's not a reflection on the individual women currently in birth suite, just a thank you birth suite gods for keeping it normal for the last 8 hours. The same way you'd say it's "great" that hasn't rained for a week!
    Last edited by wannawannabe; 01-05-2013 at 13:58.

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  13. #10
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    While I'm sure she didn't intend it, using the word "great" implies that a higher number would have been disappointing, hence that caesarean births are inferior in some way.


 

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