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  1. #21
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by mum2mj View Post
    Yeh i know you do change a to some degree But he says I change in a bad way! He doesn't like my family anyway and hates my sister and bil and I've become less involved in my family as a result. I barely talk to my sister who only 2 years ago we were like best friends. Hmm
    Hmm, then I would not take what your partner says too seriously about your supposed behaviour change when you are around your family. He clearly has his own axe to grind...how can he perceive the situation with any degree of objectivity?

    I would also be concerned about the fact that you are distancing yourself from family...is this about you or him? I have "control" alarm bells going off in my head. Ever feel like you can't do what you want for fear of his reaction?
    Last edited by Albert01; 01-05-2013 at 15:33.

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Am I the only one who's noticed that the OP's details have been incredibly and seemingly deliberately sketchy about why her partner doesn't like her family? Maybe he has good reason. Maybe (and don't take this offensively, OP, I'm just speculating and could be wrong) her family are giant, colossal asshats who treat him like crap and talk sh!t behind his back that is actually quite horrendous and no one wants to hear anyone say that sort of thing about themselves?

    My point is, until there's actually details then it's really quite difficult to decide/think/speculate that the OP's partner is abusive, particularly if two years ago her and her sister were best friends and she's been with her partner for three, so what changed?

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    Lauzy83  (01-05-2013)

  4. #23
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Adelaide SA
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I guess we are working on the info we had.
    I think if she was close to her family and sister until 2 years ago, they can't be absolute asshats? Otherwise you could assume she was an asshat too.
    Whether the control or manipulation is designed or not, it generally creeps into relationships insidiously. No one falls in love with a controlling personality or abuser.

    I may be wrong. My gut on the info we have been given, says otherwise


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