+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 14
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    1,245
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked
    272
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Help with 13mo tantrums not getting his way

    Ds is throwing tantrums quite often for example he has been opening the freezer and pulling food out for a while. Each time I say no and take him elsewhere but he will go back and do it over and over. I have even said no and tapped his hand and that doesn't phase him at all.
    When I pull him away sometimes he just cries and cries like its the worst thing ever.

    He doesn't eat his dinner like he used to. It takes over an hour to get his bowl finished. I have made a variety of foods so its not like in forcing something he doesn't like to eat.
    In the past just to get something in his tummy before bed we have given fruit so makes me think we ruined dinner time so he may think if he cries he will just get his fruit.

    What do I do to discipline him? Do you discipline at this age? I feel so bad when he gets upset and just want to run and comfort him but I need him to know what he is doing is wrong I want to try and nip this behaviour in the bud.
    This is our first child so tell me if this is just normal and you can't stop it.! Have no idea.. Thanks!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    3,487
    Thanks
    449
    Thanked
    1,571
    Reviews
    12
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    At this age, 'naughty' behaviour usually has a reason - majority of the time, that reason is tiredness. Is he getting enough sleep? I find at this age they make us think they are dropping daytime sleeps, but I am a firm believer that active children need a daytime sleep until they are at school. Is he bored?
    A few ideas, move his main meal to lunchtime, fill him with lots of protein. I don't think dinner time battles are worth it. If all he will have for dinner is milk or yoghurt or a sandwich, don't stress, he won't starve.
    As for the freezer, just keep moving him away and saying 'no, 'his name' isn't allowed in there', or easier still, you can get fridge locks - save your sanity.
    No, he isn't too young for boundaries, but pick your battles and always explain things as if he understands. Good luck.

  3. The Following User Says Thank You to MummaOJ For This Useful Post:

    babyla  (28-04-2013)

  4. #3
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    7,878
    Thanks
    3,397
    Thanked
    5,160
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    We have the same child.

    DS is 15 months and has been doing this sort of thing for a couple of months. He has not really responded to no - in fact he hates it and it turns him into a monster. At the moment we have been distracting him with other things and doing my best to ignore poor behaviours.

    He is a nightmare to change, always trying to roll, stand and today he started growling at me and kicking at me with his legs, so I picked him up mid dress, looked him in the eye and calmly said "do not kick mama" and put him in his cot and walked out. A few minutes later I walked back in and he was better.

    I think distraction before it gets to being really upset it good and I've read tantrums are their way of managing massive emotions they are having and it's important they feel comforted during this as well. So it's a bit of a balancing act I think, trying to manage the situation before it escalates.

  5. #4
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    7,878
    Thanks
    3,397
    Thanked
    5,160
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by MummaOJ View Post
    At this age, 'naughty' behaviour usually has a reason - majority of the time, that reason is tiredness. Is he getting enough sleep? I find at this age they make us think they are dropping daytime sleeps, but I am a firm believer that active children need a daytime sleep until they are at school. Is he bored?
    A few ideas, move his main meal to lunchtime, fill him with lots of protein. I don't think dinner time battles are worth it. If all he will have for dinner is milk or yoghurt or a sandwich, don't stress, he won't starve.
    As for the freezer, just keep moving him away and saying 'no, 'his name' isn't allowed in there', or easier still, you can get fridge locks - save your sanity.
    No, he isn't too young for boundaries, but pick your battles and always explain things as if he understands. Good luck.
    Excellent point about the sleep! Thanks!

  6. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    1,245
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked
    272
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Thanks guys
    Today he actually had good day sleeps so it wasn't that. He slept 1.5hrs in morning and again in arvo.
    I usually put him to bed when he gets grizzly and see if that's what's wrong. If he sleeps I know that was it. But he had been up for about 30mins when dinner battles started.

    I will try switch dinner and lunch around so I know he has eaten well atleast twice a day (loves his wheatbix brekky)

    Its hard to get that balance right of cuddles when he is upset but being firm when he is doing something he has been told no to a thousand times.
    No doesn't mean anything to him at times but other times I will just say no and he will cry knowing he is in trouble. Not with the freezer though.. That is just pure fun!

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    1,245
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked
    272
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Oh and i had cable ties and a padlock on the fridge freezer doors and he kept breaking the cable ties!! Will have to shop around to find something stronger than the plastic stuff

  8. #7
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    7,878
    Thanks
    3,397
    Thanked
    5,160
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Could it be a wonder week? My DS was very emotional and would cry when I told the dog off and it turned out to be a wonder week.

  9. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2011
    Posts
    792
    Thanks
    105
    Thanked
    145
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    My 13month old DD is the same! She made me so weary today with her whingy attitude. I *know* she was tired but she just wouldn't sleep! Little psycho lol.

    Her obsession is remote controls. I say "ta for mum" and she will very nicely hand them over... Then scream like a maniac. I ignore it if it's the millionth time or distract her by whispering so she can see my lips moving but can't hear me so will shut up to listen.

    With dinner time she has now decided she's too lazy to feed herself and will just sit there with her mouth hanging open! She's done blw since forever AND can use a spoon but this past week it's all too much effort. Oh and when she has had enough to eat, she just starts throwing food. She's never done that before.

    And she's so clingy but only to me. Wouldn't have anything to do with Dad this weekend. I'm 28 weeks pg and facing having another prem so her new obsession with me is not going to be nice if I do have to go into hospital.

    DD isn't due to start a wonder week (corrected or actual) for another week. Yay, can't wait haha.

    Sorry I don't have any advice, but you're not alone!

  10. #9
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    10,291
    Thanks
    3,115
    Thanked
    6,303
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    At that age I used to redirect and be consistent - say " DS not allowed to open the freezer" pick him straight up and move him over to an activity he likes or keep a kitchen draw full of Tupperware etc that he can play with - so don't give him time to get upset

    I think at this age their little brain is working over time and they are just curious and adventurous and smacking or tapping his hand will stop him from wanting him to explore so I would not do that - plus he can't communicate - he has no idea what he is doing is wrong - so he is probably crying as he does not understand , not cuddling him I think is the worst thing to do, he's too little to discipline I think, he just needs positive reinforcement and distraction plus opening the freezer might be fun for him or he realises it gets a reaction from you - I found this is the age DS started to get bored and always needed something to do
    Last edited by Elijahs Mum; 28-04-2013 at 21:31.

  11. #10
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Posts
    1,245
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked
    272
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Thanks guys I'm glad to hear its not just my son!
    I will keep redirecting him and hope soon he will understand what no means.

    It's hard my dh is parenting like his parents did him which was very strict. And it just makes me feel sorry for ds and I go give mummy cuddles so its probably confusing him too!
    He is at daycare now so now I wish he was home to open the freezer haha


 

Similar Threads

  1. Tantrums 9mo
    By pisang in forum Babies (7 - 12 months)
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 03-01-2013, 20:24
  2. Tantrums!
    By TnA in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 18-11-2012, 18:35
  3. Please help with tantrums :(
    By Lumpy Melon in forum Toddlers (1 year olds)
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 18-10-2012, 11:58

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Nice Pak Products
Australian Made and Owned. The Baby U Goat Milk Skincare range is enriched with soothing goats milk sourced from country, Victoria. Goat's milk has a pH level close to that of our own skin and contains natural sources of amino acids and vitamins.
sales & new stuffsee all
The Health Hub
Give a new mum a fitness boost for Christmas & New Year. Studio-based, small group training sessions - cardio, strength, core, Pilates & boxing. Choice of 16 hrs per week, flexible-arrival feature - bubs & kids welcome! Gift vouchers available.
featured supporter
Philips AVENT Australia
Pregnancy and early parenthood is an exciting and challenging time, but it’s good to know there is expert advice on hand to ensure that your baby gets the best start in life.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!