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  1. #341
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    Quote Originally Posted by headoverfeet View Post
    I'm only up to post #146 but I wonder, I am reading people saying that this is different to the 'normal' reasons for a termination they are terminating due to gender not because they didn't want a child in general, people are posting saying they would do anything for a baby a healthy one. How is this any different to a couple terminating because the fetus has tested positive to some genetic disability ect? They obviously wanted a child as well.
    The difference is that a girl would be just as healthy as a boy. Being a girl is not a genetic disability that would impact on the child's quality of life (at least not in this country).

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  3. #342
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    Quote Originally Posted by biscotti View Post
    Vic Park, I have edited the title and changed the warning part to caps while I was there, let me know if you think it needs another edit.
    Cheers,
    B
    Thanks Biscotti, looks good!

  4. #343
    lambjam's Avatar
    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    The person I feel most sorry for is their daughter, should they ever have one.

    I've yearned for a daughter, I know what it feels like to want one. But I was also realistic enough to know that my preconceived notions of what having a girl would be like were probably completely whack.

    Heaven forbid their poor daughter hate pink and plaits, or want to play soccer, or not want to have children.

    ETA My mistake, I've muddled up the genders. But reverse it all and you get my drift
    Last edited by lambjam; 01-05-2013 at 17:06.

  5. #344
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    Busy-Bee is offline Offending people since before Del :D
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    Quote Originally Posted by headoverfeet View Post
    I'm only up to post #146 but I wonder, I am reading people saying that this is different to the 'normal' reasons for a termination they are terminating due to gender not because they didn't want a child in general, people are posting saying they would do anything for a baby a healthy one. How is this any different to a couple terminating because the fetus has tested positive to some genetic disability ect? They obviously wanted a child as well.
    In one instance a woman may chose to terminate because the baby is found to have health issues significant enough that would greatly impact any quality of life and/or the parents have felt that they could not cope in that situation or do not wish to go through the heartache of having a profoundly disabled baby. In the other instance the parents have chosen to terminate because the baby has a vulva and because of their cultural background they are of the opinion that a girl baby is not something to celebrate and cherish. It may even be perceived as a burden, unlike having a boy baby that would bring honour to the family. I don't think a baby having a vulva (which approximately 50% of the human race has) is comparable to a baby having significant health issues that affects the baby and family's quality of life - if they even lived through birth.

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  7. #345
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedV View Post
    I haven't said you are wrong.

    I've seen you say on here that you want abortion to be made illegal before. There's no bodily autonomy there.
    You're right. I have said that.

    I'm obviously not being clear enough to get my point across and I am struggling to find another way. So please forgive the following bluntness.

    Just because I disagree with 1 thing that requires bodily autonomy, doesn't mean I agree with all aspects of bodily autonomy.

    You sprouting that I am not for bodily autonomy is a negative overdramatic misrepresentation that I believe is intended to *insinuate* that I am wrong.... that I am anti-female because I don't agree with non-medically necessary abortion (which you disagree with).

    This doesn't bother me, I just wanted to try and lift the veil on perceived hidden meaning. And I am happy to stand corrected if I have Mis-interpreted your intent... !

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    Quote Originally Posted by Funchu View Post
    The difference is that a girl would be just as healthy as a boy. Being a girl is not a genetic disability that would impact on the child's quality of life (at least not in this country).
    I agree. Also, whether we like it or not intent, motive and circumstance do play a role in our judging of someone's actions.

    If a woman kills her hubby because she wanted his money = bad

    If a woman kills her hubby because he screwed around = still bad but starting to somewhat understand

    If a woman kills her hubby in self defence as he is bashing her = serves him right!

    In the same way, people can judge different abortions differently, depending on the intent/circumstances etc. Every person has their own threshold when judging. For me aborting a baby simple because its a girl is abhorrent. Aborting because the woman is clinically depressed and unable to cope, not so bad.

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  10. #347
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    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
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    I guess I don't understand because I see it as your either pro-choice or pro-life. A fetuses disability, gestation or gender should have nothing to do with it. You either value all life or you value choice. I see it as hypocritical to say your pro-life/pro-choice except for xyz.

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  12. #348
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    While I understand the EMOTION behind reactions like, "I have been trying for X amount of years, and would be happy with ANYTHING I could get... so I don't agree with termination/termination for XYZ reasons," I don't think it's a rational argument to make. After all, me having a baby or not having a baby doesn't make an ounce of difference to whether you have one or not yourself. Me NOT terminating my pregnancy doesn't make you magically fall pregnant.

    But I guess sometimes rational thought processes are pushed aside when we're feeling particularly emotional about a certain topic... and I guess maybe that's the case when people do this.

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  14. #349
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    Quote Originally Posted by headoverfeet View Post
    I guess I don't understand because I see it as your either pro-choice or pro-life. A fetuses disability, gestation or gender should have nothing to do with it. You either value all life or you value choice. I see it as hypocritical to say your pro-life/pro-choice except for xyz.
    I'm pro-life ....but there is a sliding scale as to how distressed I am with an abortion, depending on the specific circumstance. And aborting because of gender is right up there with the worst of the bad (IMO).

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    Quote Originally Posted by SassyMummy View Post
    While I understand the EMOTION behind reactions like, "I have been trying for X amount of years, and would be happy with ANYTHING I could get... so I don't agree with termination/termination for XYZ reasons," I don't think it's a rational argument to make. After all, me having a baby or not having a baby doesn't make an ounce of difference to whether you have one or not yourself. Me NOT terminating my pregnancy doesn't make you magically fall pregnant.

    But I guess sometimes rational thought processes are pushed aside when we're feeling particularly emotional about a certain topic... and I guess maybe that's the case when people do this.
    I agree here.

    I've struggled when TTC both times, and my current pregnancy is an IVF one. When trying to get pregnant all I wanted was a healthy baby, and I had an immediate emotional response to someone expressing disappointment that their baby was the 'wrong' sex, when I so desperately wanted to be having ANY baby.

    However, while I felt that way, I also logically understood gender disappointment, if that makes sense. I knew that my reaction was a kneejerk one, coloured by my own emotions, and it wasn't how I truly felt when I rationally analysed it.

    So, I can understand the feelings of all those who find it abhorrent to abort based on sex, and I share a lot of those feelings.

    However, I support a woman's right to choose to terminate an unwanted pregnancy, and I also find it abhorrent for a third party to legislate that her reasons for terminating may be deemed invalid and therefore she may be forced to continue with said unwanted pregnancy.

    I would support her right to decide for herself, over my own feelings and emotions on the topic.

    Hope that made sense!

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