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  1. #1
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    Default Wedding gift etiquette - wishing wells...how much?

    I always feel uncertain with how much is the right amount to spend on wedding gifts.

    The rule I've always tried to follow is spend what you think it's cost them per head on your place at their reception. So if you go as a couple and you think it's $100/head, spend $200 on the gift...

    DH and I will be attending the wedding of a girl I work with shortly where they have asked guests to contribute to a wishing well.

    There is just nowhere to hide if I get it wrong with a wishing well..at least with a gift it is not always obvious exactly how much was spent so if I have miscalculated how much it's not so awkward/obvious....

    I am looking for bubhub guidance.

    They are having their reception at The Terrace at the Royal Melbourne Botanical Gardens. http://www.terracereception.com.au/

    She is a friend from work. A few of us do get together outside of work every now and then for 'work drinks' but I don't know her personal friends or family other than meeting her fiancé at work do's.

    They are both mid twenties and currently loving at home with parents and have just bought their first home which they'll move into once married. So the wishing well will be used to buy all the things they still need for their house, like curtains/blinds etc...

    So how much should we put into their wishing well?
    We are on a tight budget (in preparation for TTC#2) so I want to be appropriately generous without being extravagant.

  2. #2
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    I go with the $100 a head theory as the cost for the reception. Do we do $300. $100 to cover me, $100 to cover DH and $100 as a gift.


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  4. #3
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    However I do think $200 is more than sufficient.


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  6. #4
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    I give $200 for close friends / immediate family and $100 for everyone else.

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    I would just give $100.I recently travelled to NZ for a wedding.It was in the middle of nowhere,I knew NOONE going,had to hire a car to get there and didn't drink,hardly ate anything so I gave them a card,no money.

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    I would buy them a gift. It is what you are comfortable with and if they are still living at home you can get them something lovely for their new home. We had a wishing well at a fancy venue, most couples gave $100 but a few gave gifts which were appreciated also. I gave a gift at a wishing well wedding when I heard the bride say she couldn't wait to count her 'earnings' as the in laws were paying for the wedding.

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  12. #7
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    Wow, people are supposed to cover what it cost the couple to invite them

    To me a gift is a gift! Whether it be $20 or $200. Give what you feel comfortable with and what you can afford.

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  14. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jarylee View Post
    Wow, people are supposed to cover what it cost the couple to invite them

    To me a gift is a gift! Whether it be $20 or $200. Give what you feel comfortable with and what you can afford.
    I guess you don't have to cover it but this is what I've heard friends of mine talk of being 'done' in their families so I have always assumed it was a general rule most people follow....

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    I would give $100. No way would I give $200.
    But then I hate wishing wells.

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  17. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jarylee View Post
    Wow, people are supposed to cover what it cost the couple to invite them

    To me a gift is a gift! Whether it be $20 or $200. Give what you feel comfortable with and what you can afford.
    This^^^ for sure.

    Give what you can afford. I don't believe guests should have to cover their "per head" costs. The bride and groom chose it, knowing full well the prices. Any gifts or money are just a bonus IMO.

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