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  1. #121
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    I judge dont say anything but definatly judge.

  2. #122
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pesca77 View Post
    The thing I don't understand is why pregnant women continue to smoke in public and allow the opportunity for judging (be it right or wrong).

    If they claim to feel so bad and guilty, aware of the damage to their baby etc etc then why not at least keep it to the privacy of your own home?? Hide away and be ashamed if you truly are!

    Of course some women have no issue with continuing to smoke, which is their decision to make, so can do so anywhere. But I really don't get why you would smoke in public if you truly feel bad about your choices.
    ^^^ This! I don't really judge, I just can't stop looking out of shock that a pregnant woman would smoke in public!!!! I feel that women are putting themselves out there to be judged and would also expect to be judged if they are visibly pregnant and smoking in public.

  3. #123
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pesca77 View Post
    The thing I don't understand is why pregnant women continue to smoke in public and allow the opportunity for judging (be it right or wrong).

    If they claim to feel so bad and guilty, aware of the damage to their baby etc etc then why not at least keep it to the privacy of your own home?? Hide away and be ashamed if you truly are!

    Of course some women have no issue with continuing to smoke, which is their decision to make, so can do so anywhere. But I really don't get why you would smoke in public if you truly feel bad about your choices.
    I think you'll find that smoking is an addiction, and that addictions generally can't be switched off the moment you leave your home.

    I'm not a smoker and never have been... but I have suffered addiction before, and while I preferred to keep my addiction to myself, there were plenty of times that my addiction would take over when I was in public.

    I think the "why do it in public if you're *so* ashamed?" argument is a bit odd... fat people might be ashamed of their bodies, should they remain at home in case someone catches a glimpse of their fat?

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  5. #124
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    Yes I do, but I'd never say anything, or at least I'd never say anything to a stranger.

    A good friend of mine smoked during her pregnancies. I never said anything.
    One day after her kids were born I went to her house to visit. She told me to take my shoes off before entering the house as she didn't want my shoes to bring in germs on the floor where the kids were crawling.

    I took my shoes off and then told her how asking me to take my shoes of was a bit hypocritical considering she passed on all sorts of toxins to her kids by smoking when pregnant.

    She (in jest) called me a *** little b1tch coz she knew I was right!

  6. #125
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    Reading some of the other replies has made me look at things in a different light and I appreciate the point of view.

    I've really only seen a handful of pregnant women smoking and as I said in my previous post I knew 2 of them. I also lived next door to a family of smokers who seemed to have no problem with the 20/day habit that the pregnant girlfriend had and made a point of saying how healthy the baby was when he was born. They also had no problem with the 50/day habit the mother had when she was well aware she had very serious heart problems. Oh and then there was the son, FOB previously mentioned, who happily smoked pot around his pregnant girlfriend and her 4 children from a previous relationship. I can't say I didn't judge in that case. They knew the risk and just didn't care.

    Like others have said I'm one who doesn't understand why people smoke when there is so much evidence on just how bad it is. In saying that I probably shouldn't because I know that my diet has been far from healthy and has caused me a lot of health problems. I've made a lot of changes but I still have some ways to go to turn it around completely. next addiction to beat for me....dairy!

  7. #126
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    Don't get me wrong I loathe smoking - my mother has had crippling respiratory problems her entire life because she was raised by parents who smoked and she has paid the price (as did they by dying early of smoking related illnesses).

    And I also don't get the pregnant woman smoking in public if that is the only one or two she has each day - but to me it's like shouting at an overweight person for eating junk food. No amount of judgment will really make them change - it will only make the person isolated and bitter.

    I guess I was really surprised by people who admitted they smoked yet still judged others - I honestly find that very strange. I would like to think my failings make me more compassionate not less.

  8. #127
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    Yes I do, but I think it's due to my infertility. In the past I have said something to family and friends but never a stranger.

  9. #128
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sonja View Post
    I guess I was really surprised by people who admitted they smoked yet still judged others - I honestly find that very strange. I would like to think my failings make me more compassionate not less.
    I also used to wear scrunchies but it doesnt mean I wouldnt judge someone wearing one now

    I dont spew profanities, insults and rightous words in my mind about it but I do think it isnt a good look...that is my judgement of them.

  10. #129
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    Quote Originally Posted by London View Post
    I also used to wear scrunchies but it doesnt mean I wouldnt judge someone wearing one now

    I dont spew profanities, insults and rightous words in my mind about it but I do think it isnt a good look...that is my judgement of them.
    Fair enough. I'm too f--king tired to notice tbh. I'm talking more about others parenting than styles. Lots of things people wear I loathe.

  11. #130
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sonja View Post
    Fair enough. I'm too f--king tired to notice tbh. I'm talking more about others parenting than styles. Lots of things people wear I loathe.
    It was meant to be a bit of a joke.


 

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