If one more person tells me to "get over" my fear of giving birth or to just "focus on the positive" I may just lose the plot entirely.
I am 32 weeks pregnant with #3. At 38w with #2 I suffered a placental abruption and had an extremely scary, mismanaged dangerous delivery that resulted in a PPH, me almost stopping breathing when I was in labour, and giving birth to DS2 whilst he was posterior and brow presentation, causing 2nd and 3rd degree tears.
I am utterly terrified of giving birth. So much so that I cant even focus on holding my baby in my arms anytime in the near future because that means I have to go through it all again.
And anyone I open up to about my fears either makes a smart a$$ comment like "well its too late now you have to do it" or they tell me that it doesnt matter because DS2 and I were ok in the end, so how he got here doesnt matter - we both could have died from what we went through, I dont think its unreasonable for me to feel afraid!
I am just so tired of being made to feel like I am being stupid for worrying or that I am over reacting.
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