View Poll Results: Do you feel at all 'better' than those who have different fathers for their children?

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  • Yes, totally

    9 14.06%
  • A little

    10 15.63%
  • No, not at all

    45 70.31%
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  1. #21
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    I don't feel better, but I do feel grateful that my children have the same bio father, would be so much more complicated IMO, dealing with 2 paternal families, organising 2 different arrangements, etc. (not that I have to deal with that anyway, dd & ds bio dad not involved, though we do still have contact with his fam)
    Dp doesn't want children and I'm done having them but if we felt differently I'd have no problems with having another child to another bio father, *if* we had been together in a stable relationship for a long time.

  2. #22
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    I don't feel better, but depending on the circumstances I might feel like I made better choices. I do think less of people (women and men) who have multiple kids with multiple mothers/fathers when they're careless and the kids suffer as a result.

    If life just works out that way and they're doing the best for their kids, giving them a loving happy home, then I wouldn't think they were any different to me really.

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  4. #23
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    I don't think that I am better but I do feel lucky that I am in a strong marriage and that I do not have to worry about custody etc

    Seeing family law clients daily strengthens my determination to never separate (unless DS or I are harmed of course) and not to have children with anyone else if we did divorce.



    Sent from my GT-I9100T using The Bub Hub mobile app

  5. #24
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    No.

    Children need supportive environments to grow. Doesn't matter the make up of it. My only worry is that the step parent may not be as caring. Tho some bio parents are just crazy.

  6. #25
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    My boys are to the same father. He's a great dad and even though I'm not with him I'm glad he is their dad. It wouldn't bother me if they had different dads though as long as both dads were decent parents. I love the fact that my boys have each other more than anything. I'm not certain I have it in me to have another so I'm glad I was pregnant when everything went downhill so my boys got to have a brother. I hardly think I'm better than anyone though. Or that it means more because they are from the same father.

    I learnt the hard way how standing on a pedal stool thinking my life was so secure and perfect could crumble in a second. Just celebrated my 5th wedding anniversary (over 10 years together), living in a new house we'd built, secure well paying jobs, seemingly happy, hubby affectionate and a great father and always on the same page, never arguing, feeling like I could burst my life was like a fairytale .... Then just one text intercepted on a phone and the bubble burst. No one coukd believe it could happen to such a 'perfect' couple - least of all me .... So nope - I don't ever consider myself 'better', but I do clench my jaw tightly behind my forced smile when I hear others bang on about how they'd 'never' this and that.... I used to say 'never' too ....
    Last edited by Theboys&me; 19-04-2013 at 22:08.

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  8. #26
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    No I wouldn't say I am better than them but it does make me appreciate my little family when I think of my brother's kids (try to keep up this is confusing). He has 4 children to 2 mothers. Mother A has eldest child, then my 2 nieces then just had a baby to a different man (so 4 kids to 3 different fathers). Mother B has my niece and nephew and is now pregnant to another man. These kids will have all these half siblings and its messy!!

    It makes my head hurt and I feel sorry for the kids mostly. And just happy that my kids get a relatively normal, boring family.

  9. #27
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    No, certainly not better than anyone else. Particularly since I'm no longer with fob anyway

    But I am glad my boys have the same father for logistical reasons. I already hate having to share custody and make arrangements. To have to do that with more than one father would be a PITA.

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  11. #28
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    I feel better for MYSELF that my children have the same father. I really dont care what other people do.

  12. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Theboys&me View Post
    My boys are to the same father. He's a great dad and even though I'm not with him I'm glad he is their dad. It wouldn't bother me if they had different dads though as long as both dads were decent parents. I love the fact that my boys have each other more than anything. I'm not certain I have it in me to have another so I'm glad I was pregnant when everything went downhill so my boys got to have a brother. I hardly think I'm better than anyone though. Or that it means more because they are from the same father.

    I learnt the hard way how standing on a pedal stool thinking my life was so secure and perfect could crumble in a second. Just celebrated my 5th wedding anniversary (over 10 years together), living in a new house we'd built, secure well paying jobs, seemingly happy, hubby affectionate and a great father and always on the same page, never arguing, feeling like I could burst my life was like a fairytale .... Then just one text intercepted on a phone and the bubble burst. No one coukd believe it could happen to such a 'perfect' couple - least of all me .... So nope - I don't ever consider myself 'better', but I do clench my jaw tightly behind my forced smile when I hear others bang on about how they'd 'never' this and that.... I used to say 'never' too ....
    no one can ever say 'never' but as I said in my response you can be determined not to see it happen. I do not believe that there is such a thing as a perfect couple either despite some people probably thinking DH and I fall into this category.

    I just know from my experience of relationships,and as I said my career, that there is very little that I would end my marriage over and DH feels the same, the only exception one of us putting DS or the other in danger of some kind.

    I

  13. #30
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    I find the attitude of someone being better for something like this (and yes there are people who think this) strange. Better at what? A better person?


 

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