View Poll Results: Do you feel at all 'better' than those who have different fathers for their children?

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  • Yes, totally

    9 14.06%
  • A little

    10 15.63%
  • No, not at all

    45 70.31%
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  1. #111
    lambjam's Avatar
    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    Oh yeah, Of course Peanutmonkey. I don't live my life thinking it is going to happen, I just know that life has a way of throwing curve balls and I would never be one of those people that would say "XYZ would never happen to me".
    Yes. I think there's a big difference between living your life in fear and simply accepting that you can't see all ends.

    You simply cannot know beyond doubt how you or your partner would deal with certain curve balls. The death or permanent disablement of a child, an injury to one of you that leaves you irreversibly changed in some way, a long and unavoidable absence. You can't know how you would change, you can't know how your partner would change, and you sure cant know how your relationship would change. That's not to say we should live our lives in the shadow of looming peril, but we sure as hell shouldn't judge others for such things.

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  3. #112
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    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    When I see couples who are together for the "sake of the children" and the entire family is miserable I would have to agree, I made the far better choice to separate from my son's father to pursue happiness for us all.

    I find it strange that to some I would be a 'better person' should I not have had my son...because I'm not with his dad. Screw that.
    I think u need to read all my posts rather than just one answer to a question after my original post

  4. #113
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    Quote Originally Posted by BabyG4 View Post
    I get asked all the time also.
    I still remember a convo not so long ago where a lady said 'omg you have 4 beautiful daughters, are they all from the same father' 'yes' 'now not meaning to be rude but is the father still around because it would take a real good man to stick around after 4 daughters'
    Ummm WTF.. Funny thing is she thought it was normal to ask these questions and thought I was extremely lucky to have a hubby that loved his daughters and didn't leave me after no son.
    Considering sex is determined by the father id say thats all his own fault anyway lol

    What a strange and rude thing to say!

    Sent from my GT-I9100T using The Bub Hub mobile app

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  6. #114
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kelly8329 View Post
    I think u need to read all my posts rather than just one answer to a question after my original post
    I have. I still think children are not 'mistakes' or 'bad choices' unless they're not looked after. If they are... not my business.

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    DS was a mistake, an error in judgement. I'm not afraid to admit that. I'd have to have been crazy to plan to have a baby to XDP. But some mistakes turn out to be the best sliding doors moment in your life- and DS was mine, I tell him that every day, and he thanks me for "borning" him.

  8. #116
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    I don't really care TBH. I'm happy that my boys have the same dad, as they both got his super good looks, but it wouldn't be the end of the world if they had different dads.

    Just to add I've being asked if they have the same dad quiet a few times as well. Especially when ds2 was younger. I loved the follow up of 'and you're still together!?'

  9. #117
    Theophania's Avatar
    Theophania is offline 'see what had happened was..there were these three ninjas and a blue monkey and well it really wasn't my fault..'
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    I don't think I am better than someone who has children to different fathers. I feel lucky to have my beautiful children to my fantastic husband. I feel lucky that my kids have the most AWESOME father!!! I came from a blended family and never saw anything wrong with it.

  10. #118
    Buttoneska's Avatar
    Buttoneska is offline Winner 2010- Most Community Minded Thread Award
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    I only have one kid and pregnant with another

    Both same dad

    I don't feel better in the slightest but I feel bloody relieved. I often think and see how hard it is having children from different families, step siblings, half siblings, step parents etc

    It's often complicated logistically as well as emotionally, I think it would make an already hard job even harder.

  11. #119
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    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    I have. I still think children are not 'mistakes' or 'bad choices' unless they're not looked after. If they are... not my business.
    That's fine that's your opinion .
    Mine is different and I am a product of a bad choice and I am the one who has spent 30 years not knowing anything about my father or his family.
    It's not just about a mother being a great parent, luckily my mum made a better choice second and third time and my step dad is amazing.

  12. #120
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    Not at all. I do feel for those having to juggle visitation etc but they are neither worse nor better than me. I definitely judge on some things but paternity isn't one.


 

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