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  1. #1
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    Default Am I in the wrong?

    So this is a big lengthy...
    Bit of back story - BIL has a 4 yr old that he has hardly seen due to the mother being difficult. FIL refuse her as a grandchild demanding a paternity test even though he looks exactly like BIL.

    Ok so my partner started a new job doing FiFo work and he decided I should move in with his dad and brother to help us save some money. I was ok with the idea since it ment me and the kids would be closer to my family and also all our friend. (We were 3 hours away from everyone)

    So we move in and everything is alright for about a month. But the FIL starts getting annoyed at the mess the kids make, the noise they make. He starts making comments about how I am always out all day "living a life of luxury and spending all his sons money" - when in fact I was seeing friends or taking my son to the library park etc just so I wasn't in his hair.

    Anyway - fast forward a month and BIL goes to court and gets access to his daughter. He saw her once and apparently she is the smartest 4yr old ever and he starts comparing her to my 5yo daughter ad saying how stupid my DD is.
    The next night BIL and FIL got drunk and went on about how stupid my daughter is (she is not biologically my partners so not a blood relation to them) how smart BILs kid is. How my son will be raised as scum like me and my Dd.

    The next night he had a go at me because I told BIL not to threaten my daughter and FIL lost it. He called me ever name under the sun, called me a lazy fat mole and every derogatory name you could imagine. Told me he would have my son taken off me and put into his care.

    So since then I haven't gone to see him or take my son to see him. Df thinks I'm being unfair but I don't see why I should Take him to see him after what he said. It's not right and if it was anyone else I would have nothing to so with him at all....

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    Grebbeci  (18-04-2013)

  3. #2
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    what has you dp done to protect you from his family?

    He is insane, no way in the world I would ever go back near them again if they had treated my kids and I like that!

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    gizmoduckus  (19-04-2013),αληθη  (18-04-2013),LoveLivesHere  (18-04-2013),Mod-Myztik  (20-04-2013),MonkeySeeMonkeyDo  (19-04-2013),SoThisIsLove  (18-04-2013),SugarSkull  (19-04-2013)

  5. #3
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    Definitely do not go back there! That sounds horrible and not a safe environment for you or your children. I'd be telling your DP he has no idea what has been going on and there is no way he can expect you to put up with that crap.

    I am so sorry you're going through this how horrible.

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    MonkeySeeMonkeyDo  (19-04-2013),SugarSkull  (19-04-2013)

  7. #4
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    I would be moving away from the crazies as fast as I could. Especially if you're there on your own op. Saving money is great but at the risk of living in such a negative environment, especially for your children, I would not stay. Nor would I be making ANY contact with bil. Good luck op.

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    mrsoptomistic  (19-04-2013),SugarSkull  (19-04-2013)

  9. #5
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    They sound like revolting people. The way they spoke about you and your DD is appalling. Did they not care that you would possibly overhear their comments?

    Have you made other living arrangements? You don't need to be subject to that kind of treatment.

    And put your foot down and keep it down regarding your husband wanting you to visit them with your DS. I don't think he should expect you to have anything to do with them after what they have done and said.

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    Mod-Myztik  (20-04-2013)

  11. #6
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    You are not being unreasonable.

    No way I would be around those people with my children and I'd be so pi%%ed if my DH didn't support me on this.

    These people are gross. Toxic.

  12. #7
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    my gosh, how disgusting are these ferral people?!! how dare they treat you both like that. DO NOT go near them again. as for your dp - if he were my dp, boy he would have it coming his way so fast he wouldn't know what hit him. He should be on your side.

  13. #8
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    You are not in the wrong... What dreadful people.

    Stay far, far away.

    Like pp's said, saving money is great, but being abused isn't worth it.

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    MonkeySeeMonkeyDo  (19-04-2013)

  15. #9
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    You are not in the wrong you and your children do not need to be in a negative environment and no one not even family has the right to make you and your children feel like you are nothing.

  16. #10
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    Your dh needs to step up and protect you all, he is suppose to be your safe place to fall.

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    MonkeySeeMonkeyDo  (19-04-2013)


 

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