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  1. #81
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    FearlessLeader is offline Winner 2013 - Most Memorable Thread
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    My family have been proud atheists for at least 4 generations. Please don't dismiss my family's strong belief in humanism and reason, which have been passed down on BOTH sides if my family for over 100 years, as I don't dismiss anyone else's belief in religion, PP. [text removed by moderator]
    Last edited by Mod-pegasus; 18-04-2013 at 14:24.

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    Weighing in as being raised by 1 catholic and 1 athiest parent. Is it really worth conflict with your significant other or their/your family? I mean think about it logically - believer or not, it's an old dude in a funny dress rambling on about the phases of life and he then tips some water on the kids head. Will it change your child physically? No. Will it change your child mentally at this age? No. Will your child remember the ceremony and ask questions? No. Will your child be forever bound to the church? No. I was baptized and I haven't stepped foot in a church off my own back, nor have the church chased me down with nets and pitchforks. My parents were very diplomatic at speaking to me from both sides and giving me the options to choose my beliefs once I was old enough to understand maturely.
    Don't let your stubbornness about your beliefs ruin a good family dynamic and yours/your child's relationship with others! If you don't believe in it then having it done shouldnt bother you

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    Quote Originally Posted by Olin View Post
    I don't think my opinion is rude at all. That's how I view atheism. It doesn't have any tradition, science or evolution isn't an atheist belief, it doesn't 'belong' to atheism. They are 2 different things.
    You can teach your children about science and how you view the world AND about God and religion. Why does it have to be 1 or the other?
    Baptism isn't a bad thing. A child can get baptised and learn about 1 parents religion and also about the other parents views and make up their own mind later on (as most people do) when I say trump, I believe if a parents beliefs involve a ceremony, then that ceremony is important enough to not include it at all.

    I don't think anyone should get angry. Its just my opinion. If you are comfortable with your beliefs mine shouldn't worry you, they're not about you and I'm not telling you how to raise your kids. I'm not an extremist in anything so I'm open to most things.
    You said atheism holds little value and no tradition or culture. My family is living proof that you are wrong in this. As GirlX pointed out, and as I explained, atheism is more than just a lack of belief. Please don't try to hide behind the "but is just my opinion" line. Wrong is wrong and it is rude indeed to decide that a whole group (atheists) holds less value than another group (religious people) because they don't hold ceremonies. You say your view isn't about me but if its about atheists, then yeah, it is about me, and you dont really get to dictate how I feel about it and it does make me angry when atheism is dismissed as less important or less valuable because its not religion.

    I did not say evolution and science cannot be valued by religious people at all, I was saying these form a large part of the core of atheism. Whereas religious people either disbelieve science or attribute it to an invisible deity, which is quite different IMO.

    Baptism might be fine by you, not bad at all, but it would be abhorrent for me. And I'm not alone in feeling this way.

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    Quote Originally Posted by SassyMummy View Post
    Sometimes you just forget to talk about things before you become seriously involved with someone.
    Not to be antagonistic, but I honestly find it incredulous that people don't discuss, or have any real sense of their partner's stance on religion...

    Either way the OP said it came out of the blue - so in her case I think that it's unfair on her to have to compromise - if he had have discussed such am important thing with her prior, then fair enough but he didn't. Not cool to spring it on her now and in my mind he is the one who should compromise.

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    As an atheist myself though what I don't get is when self proclaimed atheists say they wouldn't baptise their children but if their partner wanted it done it's up to them to do it and raise them in the religion.

    If people really did hold strong atheist views wouldn't they fight their partner as their belief their child shouldn't be baptised is as important to them? I just can't wrap my head around that position.

    I think the point here in the OP is that her partner didn't have strong religious views until after the baby was born when he decided baptism was important. People are entitled to change their minds, but she doesn't have to give ground just because he's had a change of heart. I'm not sure how I'd negotiate this as it's never happened to me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    My family have been proud atheists for at least 4 generations. Please don't dismiss my family's strong belief in humanism and reason, which have been passed down on BOTH sides if my family for over 100 years, as I don't dismiss anyone else's belief in religion, PP. How small minded
    You claim to be highly intelligent, surely you can have a discussion without resorting to name calling.
    Humanism and reason isn't an atheist belief, it doesn't 'belong' to atheism.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Olin View Post
    You claim to be highly intelligent, surely you can have a discussion without resorting to name calling.
    Humanism and reason isn't an atheist belief, it doesn't 'belong' to atheism.
    Just as culture and tradition doesn't 'belong' to religion.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MeetTheBluths View Post
    Either way the OP said it came out of the blue - so in her case I think that it's unfair on her to have to compromise - if he had have discussed such am important thing with her prior, then fair enough but he didn't. Not cool to spring it on her now and in my mind he is the one who should compromise.
    just to clarify, my view comes from the point if view that this was a surprise to the OP, which to me implies that:
    - he isn't a practicing Christian
    - he doesn't discuss or follow the faith

    This to me says he is agnostic at best! I would think one needs to at least show an interest or preference for Christianity if they want their child baptised... Otherwise it makes no sense and you may as well just have a non-religious ceremony.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    Just as culture and tradition doesn't 'belong' to religion.
    This doesn't make sense. There are certain traditions cultures and beliefs that do belong to individual religions and is specific to them.
    Nothing belongs to atheism, any belief or tradition you have is yours individually. There is nothing organised about atheism and to want claim to that is hypocritical isn't it?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Olin View Post
    This doesn't make sense. There are certain traditions cultures and beliefs that do belong to individual religions and is specific to them.
    Nothing belongs to atheism, any belief or tradition you have is yours individually. There is nothing organised about atheism and to want claim to that is hypocritical isn't it?
    So? That doesn't mean all culture or tradition belongs to religion either. Some religions have these things. Some cultures and traditions exists that have nothing to do with religion. And some families have traditions that are atheist. I don't know why you call yourself open yet wont accept this.

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