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  1. #1
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    Default Comfort Feeding?

    Ok so I've seen people say different things about comfort feeding/feeding to sleep etc and I'm a bit confused. I'm still around 6 weeks away from having bub so I really have no idea at this point but I want to be prepared.

    On the one hand, I've read that breastfed babies will wake frequently during the night, and that's normal. But then I've seen other people say that if they don't want to feed bub every time they cry because they don't want to encourage 'comfort feeding'.

    So how do you know if your baby is hungry or just wants to suck for comfort? I want to try to avoid dummies if I can and I've been told that babies will often just want to suck and its fine to give them the breast for that reason, but then other people just seem so against it?

    I don't want bub to always have to be bf every time he wakes up in order to get back to sleep but I assume that they grow out of comfort feeding at some point? But at the same time I don't want to deprive him if that is what he needs. What if he's actually hungry every time he wakes up? How do you tell?

    Sorry if this is a bit all over the place, I don't really even know what I'm talking about I'm just a bit nervous about the whole bf thing, I really really want it to work for us and I feel like there's a lot of conflicting information about the 'right' way to do it

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    SpecialPatrolGroup's Avatar
    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    Hungry, seeking comfort, over tired...whatever. If my dd seemed to be seeking the breast she got it. IMO it all helps to remind her that she is loved and that I am responding ro her needs as and when she needs it. My dd went on to self wean at 20 months and is an affectionate but very independent little human.

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    Bf offers nourishment, cuddles, happy hormones for baby, sleepy hormones for mum and baby, pain relief, warmth and comfort.

    So my motto is that you can't over comfort a baby and if in doubt pop a boob out.

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    Quote Originally Posted by SpecialPatrolGroup View Post
    Hungry, seeking comfort, over tired...whatever. If my dd seemed to be seeking the breast she got it.
    Ditto!!!! We fed to sleep until it stopped working, at which point we tried something new. She self weaned at 14mths and now self settles without too much trouble, and is still a very cuddly little girl Each baby is different, go with the flow and with what suits your family. As knowledgable and helpful as people can be, I ignored most of the advice given to me and did what felt right for us hope this helps!

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    SpecialPatrolGroup is offline T-rex is cranky until she gets her coffee.
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    I just want to add - don't listen to all of the *making a rod for your own back* stuff that people go on with. I carried my feeding to sleep routine around like a dirty secret - don't ever let anyone make you feel bad for responding to your baby's needs.

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    It really does come down to what you're comfy with, and what you think your baby needs. I don't comfort feed at night. DD wakes 2 or 3 times for a feed in the night. If she wakes any more than that I send DP in. If he can't settle her in 30 minutes I'll then feed her, but otherwise I don't want her coming looking for feeds every hour all night. We don't bed share, so I won't comfort feed. If you want to bed share and are happy to comfort feed, that's up to you. There's no right way to do it. But i would say at least for the first few months, offer your baby feeds whenever they want it, as you can mess with your supply if you don't. But as they get older and you know them better, you can tell a bit more when they're actually hungry.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post
    Bf offers nourishment, cuddles, happy hormones for baby, sleepy hormones for mum and baby, pain relief, warmth and comfort.

    So my motto is that you can't over comfort a baby and if in doubt pop a boob out.
    This exactly

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    Quote Originally Posted by SpecialPatrolGroup View Post
    Hungry, seeking comfort, over tired...whatever. If my dd seemed to be seeking the breast she got it. IMO it all helps to remind her that she is loved and that I am responding ro her needs as and when she needs .
    I agree with this ^^^

    I will offer DD3 the breast whenever I can see that she is upset or looking for it. It works well for us she is a very happy baby

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    I comfort feed at day and night. I see it as part of my job spec, as I am currently on maternity leave. As my son has grown older, I have a few different strategies and he doesn't always want to be comforted in that way, but if he is hysterical or upset, I definitely pop him on the breast. At times it can be the only way to calm him down or get him to sleep if he is overtired. The way I see it - it's stressful being a baby, and so I will comfort him as much as I can/as he needs. You can't overfeed a breastfed baby.

    However, you have to do what feels right for you, and feel good about it, because goodness knows every Tom, Joan and Martha will have an opinion on how much/how little you feed, dress, play with, nap etc. your little one.

    I did lots of reading during pregnancy, as a FTM, and had all sorts of opinions on how I wanted to parent. I have to say that while that's been a great foundation for me, more often than not instinct takes over anyway...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post
    Bf offers nourishment, cuddles, happy hormones for baby, sleepy hormones for mum and baby, pain relief, warmth and comfort.

    So my motto is that you can't over comfort a baby and if in doubt pop a boob out.
    I agree with this, particularly when they are still very little. Now that my DS is 5 mths I do sometimes get DH to resettle him if we are having a rough night but I would always comfort feed if necessary (eg DH couldn't settle him back to sleep or DS is upset). I am comfort feeding to sleep now as DS has a sore throat at the moment and is looking for extra comfort.

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