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  1. #61
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    Wow, what a situation! I haven't read all the replies and I probably don't have much to offer as advice, but what you are going through is way too complicated for a GP to treat. A GP should be referring you to the people who ARE qualified to help you. If he won't refer you, find a new GP. He is too involved with you and totally unprofessional. Seems like he has his own issues and you are suffering because of them.

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  3. #62
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    I think psych ward does sound scary. But have you ever considered going to one that is more like a 'home?' There were a couple I looked into once when I was having a very hard time. They weren't part of the hospital, they were more places you admitted yourself to to rest. I reached a point once where it sounded nice, to potentially go away for a week or two and rest and have people focusing on me and helping me figure everything out. Not having to worry about any outside pressure.

    How long have you been depressed? Did I read before, 8 months? I know it seems like such a long time but depression (especially severe) does take a long time to overcome. This is the first full year I haven't been on anti-depressants since 2004. It's taken a combination of meds and therapy and sometimes my meds needed to be changed or raised. I think with how severe you are your psychiatrist and therapist should probably be handling your care the most and just a GP every now and then to update your referrals. Have you not found your counsellor helpful, have you tried others? I only found a counsellor this past year that I really like, I've tried many on and off and finally found one that I feel really gets it and is helping. Battling depression is a constant trial and error of figuring out what works.

  4. #63
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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    Actually, & this is going to sound bad & I hadn't really thought about it until now, but when we started talking (about 3 weeks after beginning Efexor) he wanted me to trial coming of them because he thought he could make me better.. I came off them, & have questioned quite a few times to him that I possibly do need them, that I feel such strong anxiety still even though the depression has slightly lessoned.. He tells me I don't need meds, that I'm okay. I don't think he wants to acknowledge I'm unwell. I just take what his sais as gospel, he is VERY respected & runs his clinic.. I just read how bad that all sounds. My gosh, this is overwhelming!!
    I agree with everything everyone says.

    Just by this comment alone I'm inclined to think he is wanting to keep you unwell and dependant on him because you say he said he liked it..
    So why would he want you to be any different to what he likes? He obviously doesn't care for our emotional welfare if he's been inappropriate to you.

    I think you have now been given all the advice that is going to be said.. The next step and next chapter in your life lies with you and only you. No one else will ever fix you except you.

    I think You know now what you need to do...

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  6. #64
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    I agree that you seem quite strong even though you dont feel it. thats why I think you have the faculty to start building an alternate support network ASAP to protect yourself if this current one stops (seeing as it is highly inappropriate and the Dr would definitely know that what he is doing is plain WRONG).

    There is one thing about this situation I can not shake, and I really don't want to distract others from keeping up the excellent posts that can help you, but I think it's worth considering. When I read your story, I got the same creepy gut churning feeling I do when I hear about terrible cases of kids being abused. So often those kids are vulnerable and someone comes in to their life and preys upon them because they know they are easy targets, and more often than not those adults are in positions of authority/power. There are quite a few parallels here in my mind and I am of firm belief that this is entirely his abuse of his power and position of trust, and that you are in no way to blame, you have simply become his victim. I do not think you are in any way to blame for the situation; I think that if you started to feel partially to blame may make things harder to recover from in the long term.

    Having said that, if looking at the situation as an emotional affair is the kick in the pants you need to cease contact, then harness that feeling but do so knowing that it may make things tougher in the long run.

    I just don't think you should beat yourself up and think it is your fault. Being depressed, suffering anxiety, these things can make your thoughts stray so far from what a rational, mentally healthy person would think. I find sometimes people who have not been in that position can not understand how far removed your thoughts can be and can not understand HOW your mind could tell you these thoughts and that you'd actually believe them. And that's not YOU, that's your mental illnesses making that happen. So in my mind your actions would hardly constitute a conscious choice to start an emotional affair. In fact, your actions when under fire have suggested that you understand the inappropriateness of this situation and your want to stop it (turning down the kiss, avoiding contact since, posting on here looking for help). The tough bit now left for you is sorting out that alternative support network

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  8. #65
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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    Actually, & this is going to sound bad & I hadn't really thought about it until now, but when we started talking (about 3 weeks after beginning Efexor) he wanted me to trial coming of them because he thought he could make me better.. I came off them, & have questioned quite a few times to him that I possibly do need them, that I feel such strong anxiety still even though the depression has slightly lessoned.. He tells me I don't need meds, that I'm okay. I don't think he wants to acknowledge I'm unwell. I just take what his sais as gospel, he is VERY respected & runs his clinic.. I just read how bad that all sounds. My gosh, this is overwhelming!!
    Are you serious?!!!! It takes 3-4 weeks for an antidepressant to start working and he had you go off it only 3 weeks after starting it??!!!!!! Did he wean you off? This man is not safe.

  9. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kirst33 View Post
    I think psych ward does sound scary. But have you ever considered going to one that is more like a 'home?' There were a couple I looked into once when I was having a very hard time. They weren't part of the hospital, they were more places you admitted yourself to to rest. I reached a point once where it sounded nice, to potentially go away for a week or two and rest and have people focusing on me and helping me figure everything out. Not having to worry about any outside pressure.

    How long have you been depressed? Did I read before, 8 months? I know it seems like such a long time but depression (especially severe) does take a long time to overcome. This is the first full year I haven't been on anti-depressants since 2004. It's taken a combination of meds and therapy and sometimes my meds needed to be changed or raised. I think with how severe you are your psychiatrist and therapist should probably be handling your care the most and just a GP every now and then to update your referrals. Have you not found your counsellor helpful, have you tried others? I only found a counsellor this past year that I really like, I've tried many on and off and finally found one that I feel really gets it and is helping. Battling depression is a constant trial and error of figuring out what works.
    Well, it started as OCD/anxiety.. The ocd was present for many years, but came in the form of disturbing thoughts & constantly paralyzingly anxiety.. This, of course, led to depression. The have an amazing OCD / anxiety psychologist, she is amazing & has been there all the way through. I must add, this GP is not just a regular GP, he is trained in mental health & specializes in this area (even my psychiatrist was happy for him to control that side of it). I know it is a long process, I do understand that... It was just so paralyzingly, I just want my life back

  10. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kirst33 View Post
    Are you serious?!!!! It takes 3-4 weeks for an antidepressant to start working and he had you go off it only 3 weeks after starting it??!!!!!! Did he wean you off? This man is not safe.
    We talked about it, & I agreed. I always thought he knew what was best. He sort of weaned me, then it got hard so I recommended, then he wasn't sure I needed them so I continued to wean.. Now I want to recommended but he tells me I am not ill anymore, that I am better & meds will not help me now, just like they never have....

  11. #68
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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    Well, it started as OCD/anxiety.. The ocd was present for many years, but came in the form of disturbing thoughts & constantly paralyzingly anxiety.. This, of course, led to depression. The have an amazing OCD / anxiety psychologist, she is amazing & has been there all the way through. I must add, this GP is not just a regular GP, he is trained in mental health & specializes in this area (even my psychiatrist was happy for him to control that side of it). I know it is a long process, I do understand that... It was just so paralyzingly, I just want my life back
    If nothing else, please tell your psychiatrist about thia doctors actions so she stops referring him. His behavior is appauling and so far away from proper behavior its not funny.

    Sent from my HUAWEI-U8850 using BubHub

  12. #69
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    I'm sorry, I don't think he's safe. What dr has you try a med for only three weeks? Like I said. They take 3-4 weeks to even begin to work. My Dr wouldn't talk about weaning me off my anti-d's until I could tell him I had 6 full months of feeling good...

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  14. #70
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    Oh hun, I wish I could give you a big hug! What a scary and overwhelming situation to be in. Your GP is totally in the wrong, he has broken all codes of ethics and he is taking advantage of you and your vulnerable state. I am completely disgusted by his behaviour, it is so very wrong on so many levels.

    None of this is your fault though. None of it! The first think I really think you need to do is to talk to a mental health professional. Are you currently seeing a psychologist or counsellor? If not, you urgently need to get yourself an appointment. Ring the number that the Humber up thread gave you for the Alfred. You need someone to help you with how to handle this situation. A mental health professional can help you work through it all and give you the advice and help you need to end this relationship.

    You can do this. You do not need this GP in your life. He is not helping you, he is making this worse and even more confusing for you long term. Speak to someone babe, you have nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about.

    Big hugs xxx


 

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