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  1. #431
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wise Enough View Post
    Undercover when I went through my situation I found talking to people helpful. Do what you feel helps you. It's a bit like looking for answers, no one has been in that situation so they can't help, but I found talking about it helped neutralise the pain a but, it became like discussing the weather in the end, didn't upset me at all.

    In regards to legal action you really can't do anything until a decision has been made he did cross the line. So don't decide yet. Wait a year and see how you feel. Your feelings may change. I know you just want the physc sessions covered but in reality if you think about it you haven't been able to work so you should be compensated for lost earnings. Your marriage has suffered and you and your DH may need counselling in the future so you should claim for that too. I'm not a lawyer but you will be amazed at how much you have been affected financially by all of this.

    So in the interim start recording missed days of work (and back as far as you can remember). Write down when your shrink sessions are and how much they cost. I can't stress enough how important it is to record it because you will never remember later. Perhaps start a diary writing down how you feel?

    Psychological injury is hard to prove if you're functioning. But you haven't been functioning for a while and it should be easy to prove. That being said I think going back to work is great for you.

    Stay strong

    Hello,
    thank you for those tips, I will do that. It's mainly the psych sessions I can't afford and I think he should pay for those, but at the same time I feel to protective of him to sue him! I think in the back of my mind I just want to have a possibility that one day it will all be okay again and we can be friends. Stupid really, I know I don't want that and won't do that but it's like I just want the possibility there... Ahhh I don't know!
    you are right, psychological injury is hard to prove. My psych has documented everything which might help, and my condition seriously deteriorated because of what he has done.. Yes I am still functioning but barely and I hate that I have suffered so much pain and he is just happily getting away with it. For that reason alone id like to sue him, I don't even care if I lose, I just want him to feel some of this hurt and anxiety! That sounds horrible and in another sense I don't want him to suffer at all... Can you tell I am confused? xx

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    Don't think about legal action now, just keep recording everything (don't just leave it up to your shrink) and see how you feel in a year from now. I know you need the money for your sessions but even if you did start immediately the money would never be through in time. In my case the other side didn't deny what had happened but a settlement still took 1.5 years to happen.

    How did you feel when Rhianna took back Chris Brown a week after he had beaten her senseless? I imagine you wondered WTF like the rest of the world. I think she said something about missing him and still loving him and I though ARGH!! He beat you!! In your case the doctor didn't hit you but he sure messed you up good and proper.

    KEEP RECORDING EVERYTHING!! Every sick day. Every appointment. Every cent you spend that might be caused by him.

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    One day at a time is right hun, you have come such a long way.

    If you read this topic from beginning to now you can see how far you have progressed and how much stronger you have become.

    There may be some free services available to you if you contact your local mental health team. There are plenty of loopholes and ways to get around the system if you are able to link in with the right people

    Just remember you have an entire army here ok bubhub that are fully supportive of you and if you are having weak moments (we all have them), where you need a bit of support, there are plenty of people here willing to offer it. Just know that lots of us think of you often and send positive thoughts xx

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    Sorry I haven't read other replies but honestly, I think he has done this before and he is totally praying on your vulnerability. I have no idea how you should handle it as I don't know what it's like having your mental complications...but I seriously think he might be a "successful sociopath" (look it up). And even if he isn't, this isn't going to end well, trust me.

    *good vibes for you*

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    Hi undercover! Lovely to hear from you. Would it be easier for you to take legal action against the practice as his employer? Not sure if it's possible, but they have certainly contributed to how you're feeling right now.

    I know you're feeling a lot of feelings, but it's so great to acknowledge them as I believe understanding how you feel is fundamental to your healing. And you will heal.

    Take care x

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    Thanks ladies...
    Mrsharvey I will look into that. There's a huge part of me that does not want to take legal action but another part that is deeply hurting as a result of his misconduct. It's not fair that I am suffering so much worse directly resulting from the position I went to for help. I just wonder if it would help me heal or if it would make things worse.

    i am really struggling today and keep wishing that I had not ruined the doctor patient relationship.. That is what I am really missing. Feelings of his aside, I really relied on him and I hate that I have lost it. I know it sounds silly and sometimes I wonder if I am actually crazy for hurting this badly... I wonder if a day will come that I can go a few minutes without thinking about it all, at the moment, I can't.

    You have all been so helpful and I really thank you xx any advice is always appreciated and gives me something to read!!

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    Just be aware that any legal action against him will cost you tens of thousands of dollars.

    Even if you win and get your costs awarded, you will still have to pay upfront before getting anything back.

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    Quote Originally Posted by NancyBlackett View Post
    Just be aware that any legal action against him will cost you tens of thousands of dollars.

    Even if you win and get your costs awarded, you will still have to pay upfront before getting anything back.

    Not true, most big firms take cases on a no win no fee basis. They will take their costs out of whatever is awarded. They won't take the case if they don't think they can win.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wise Enough View Post
    Not true, most big firms take cases on a no win no fee basis. They will take their costs out of whatever is awarded. They won't take the case if they don't think they can win.
    You still usually have to pay for outgoings as the case progresses. So things like filing costs, getting expert reports etc.

    Plus you have to take into account if you lose, you mightn't have to pay your own lawyer but in all likelihood you will have to pay for the other side's legal costs.

    If you sue the medical practice instead of - or as well as - which makes sense because they will have deeper pockets to pay should you win, you also have to factor in that those deeper pockets mean they can afford more expensive representation and will likely do so.

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    No, I never had to pay a cent until the end, and it came directly out of a settlement. If you withdraw from the case you have to pay.

    Though its true if you lose you may have to pay the other sides costs. They will give you a fair idea on what your chances are at an initial meeting.


 

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