thank you all again for the helpful replies. Well I made it through the weekend and I went to WORK today. I did not expect I would be able to do that, but I did it! My boss is an amazingly caring beautiful woman who I would be so bloody lost without, and also my colleagues especially those I work closest to. I honestly work with the most amazing, supportive beautiful people I could ever wish to work with.
For me, yes I still feel depressed blah blah but I did it. I have a psychiatrist appointment on Wednesday & I have gone back and seen my old GP, who I did shared care with during my pregnancy with me daughter & has seen me a few times here & there over the past year. He was really supportive too.
Umm what else...
I visited a girlfriend last night, she is my best friends sister in law and our dds are the same age and wanted a play. I see this friend occasionally, but she sees my doctor, yes the doctor, and loves him. Every time id heard her mention his name lately I felt like vomiting. She has seen him for 10+ years and he does her paps and everything.. Plus he sees her kids. She asked me what happened as she had heard a little bit from my best friend.. She said she saw him last week and he was bright red and really awkward with her (he knew we knew each other). Anyway she asked me what happened.. I decided to tell her because I thought seeing as she sees him for the things she does and the fact she trusts him with her dd and one day her dd may see him alone, I told her everything... She was in shock. She never wants to see him again, she said she's always found him creepy but had thought he was a great GP. Anyway we got talking about my issues, as I had never spoken to her about any of it, I guess it was a bit personal. She told me that last year she had an app with him and he told her "I see your friend *undercover*, wow she is in a bad wow, don't worry I will fix her". My friend had no idea what he was talking about & never bought it up with me because she had no idea how!!
anyway, that in itself is so bloody wrong..
well there's my update, thank you all again! x