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  1. #391
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    It is still a long hard road ahead, but be proud of the steps you've already taken along that road. I am glad that you asked for help and have come to this point now. Keep going, you have already taken the hardest steps.

  2. #392
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    You are showing amazing strength, you are doing the right thing. Its sounds like you have come a long way. It is great you told your husband and that you have recognised what an unhealthy relationship you had with your GP. Great stuff!

  3. #393
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    I'm so glad yesterday was ok. You must have been so nervous!

    Please don't fall into thinking 'I should have known'. You were doing the best you could with what you knew at the time. Everyone trusts their GP - you have to be able to. He was the one that breached the trust. Yes, you have hindsight now, but please don't think you should have known then. You didn't. And that's ok. He sounds like an old pro at this sort of cr*p.

    The depression will linger for a while, but you are finding clarity within yourself, and that's great.

  4. #394
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    Sounds like you have reached a turning point and things will only get better from here!

  5. #395
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    Thanks ladies. I am really not feeling like I have turned a corner. I feel so horrible.. I just want to contact him - logically, there is no single reason. I wonder if this feeling will ever pass. God I hope so. I can barely get out of bed. My psych sessions are no longer covered by Medicare & I need them so badly! The only way to get them funded is to sue him and I do not want to do that. This is so god damn hard!!

    thanks for letting me vent!

  6. #396
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    Can you see another gp and get a new mental health care plan so you get more psych sessions? Stay strong - you're doing really well. Every second that goes by is one more closer to feeling better.

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    Undercover001  (01-06-2013)

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    Unfortunately no, the max is now 10 sessions per year. I just hate that I wasted all of them trying to figure out what my GP was doing to me & now that he has screwed me up more I cannot get access to any more and I really really need them! Argh.

  9. #398
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    I have been told by a GP that the amount can be extended in certain circumstances (he said something like up to 52 visits per year). Maybe see if you can have a chat with Medicare and see what those circumstances are and if you would be able to qualify.

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  11. #399
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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    Unfortunately no, the max is now 10 sessions per year. I just hate that I wasted all of them trying to figure out what my GP was doing to me & now that he has screwed me up more I cannot get access to any more and I really really need them! Argh.
    You could alway try using the beyond blue website http://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-sup...ediate-support

    They have a free 24 hr phone number - 1300224636 u can call and talk to a trained mental health professional about what you're going through. They also offer online chat between 4-10pm everyday if u wouldn't want to talk on the phone.

    They might be able to point u in the direction of some free or more affordable health care. Perhaps find you a psychiatrist etc that bulk bills. You seriously cannot wait till next January to have another session when the Medicare rebates roll over.
    I saw a psychiatrist A LOT last yr. it was expensive to begin with but once I got to my Medicare threshold around the middle of the yr I was only paying around $10 for a 1hr session instead of over $100. U need to find the money someway, rearrange ur finances. Your mental health should be your number 1 priority. Without your health u will really struggle in your life and your relationships.

    Sorry if that sounded bossy. But I've been in that depressive black hole and I know the only way out is to get yourself out. Staying in bed and worrying will only lead to more of the same.

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  13. #400
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    Thanks ladies. I will somehow find out how to find more sessions. Unfortunately since all of this has happened I haven't been able to work much and we are extremely broke doesn't help. We are struggling to pay bills etc so I don't know how I'd find another $140 a week for app.. But I will work something out.

    today has been awful. I cried for 10 hours, I considered admitting myself to a psychiatric ward about 50 times. I have done some stupid things in the past few days.... Ready, judge away, I deserve it :-(

    1. Ages ago, when on the phone to my GP, I added his son while looking at his page (in error, I was scrolling down on my phone) and Facebook would not let me retract the request. Dr didn't care so I left it and his son never accepted but never declined it. When all of this came out with AHPRA, I sent an inbox message to his son asking him to decline the request. I did not want him to recognise my name & add me and write on my wall... He did not decline it. Then when his family found out, his son noticed straight away and recognised my name. Again I asked him to retract the request. He did not. I left it....

    2. About 1.5 weeks ago I received an anonymous text message basically telling me that my gps wife was struggling with what he had done and wanted to speak to me for clarification. She wanted me to help her understand. I told my GP about the message and he said it was up to me. I didn't call her, I wanted to help her I really did but I was afraid (selfish I suppose).. Last Wednesday, I received another identical message. I called her and explained. I said I would talk if she wanted and went to give her my number. Well she screamed at me, told me her husband hand not had ANY contact with me in the past 6 weeks and.... Turns out she is not struggling with mental illness and is not an alcoholic, which is how he drew me into his world argh. I hung up in tears, I think I was set up there..... Then I did the dumbest thing I have done through the whole thing. I was angry that she blamed me and that she didn't believe me that her husband had still been contacting me to get me to change my statement, I forwarded a text of his where he was telling me "I need to see you to talk about your statement. My wife is almost asleep, once she is I will be able to get out".. Then a subsequent one saying "my wife woke up. I will not be able to get out to see you today, damn!" And I few other comments.. I forwarded that to her via the sons Facebook account. I know, so so so so childish. I should never have done that and a soon as I hit send, I regret it and there was no way to retract it. I am so horrible.

    I have now had hubby bloxk the sons account, all contact numbers of my doctor, the texts giving me his wife's number, have all been erased. I have asked that him and his family do not contact me & that I will so the same. I have done so many stupid things and I just have this huge guilt, his family didn't deserve to get involved and I never meant to cause harm . I feel like all along I have been set a big trap . I told the medical board everything. & have them copies of what had been sent to the Facebook account. They said they could understand & weren't concerned about my contact there. But I still feel terrible.

    i have felt extremely suicidal today, this is quite new for me and I am scared to feel like this. At what point should I seek help? I feel like sometimes I lose the ability to think rationally and just get so hopelessly sad.

    I feel like I've destroyed who I am. I used to be so kind, so caring, so honest and so not like anything I have done... Oh ladies. You can judge, just please not too harshly, at least not tonight. I'm bawling as I write this and I just needed to tell you since you ladies know the rest of the story xoxoxoxo


 

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