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  1. #311
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    Stop being so hard on yourself. You're sick and someone took advantage of you while you're sick to try and benefit themselves. They will keep trying to manipulate you until you feel strong enough to not need them.

    Maybe plan a holiday with your hubby and DD? Put all your effort into that.

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  3. #312
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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    Hi ladies....
    I had a little melt down before reading all of the replies. Basically I feel like a terrible person & I know everything I am doing it wrong. I don't know how to forgive myself for everything I have caused & apparently this may be resulting from PTSD caused by my dr, though I am not to sure. I have OCD (for those of you who do not know - obsessive compulsive disorder is an anxiety disorder usually incorporating depression... Obsession & compulsive behaviour to reduce anxiety & depression.... ) I know it is all part of my illness but I need to be it. I have made an app with my psych for tomorrow & I am going to figure out a plan.
    i have to best this, I have to let it go.... Or this depression will never go & the anxiety will linger too. I know I am prolonging the pain for a temporary fix, & in the end the pain could be much worse.

    so any tips ladies?
    im sorry for my meltdown... I decided maybe this thread wasn't so good for me while I'm feeling so low (I contemplated taking my entire packet of sleeping pills after my last post............ & then I realised I need the support. I need an outlet.
    Thank you again, everyone!!!!
    I am a long time sufferer of OCD and depression and anxiety if you ever want to talk feel free to pm me

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  5. #313
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    I think nancy meant that if you are waiting for this case to go through the boards and decision made regarding your GP, and his conduct towards you, in order to gain some kind of closure or ability to move on, it may be a while.
    She is advocating for you to move on and get the help you need irrespective of where the case is headed etc.
    complaints can take a while, to collate evidence etc etc. don't wait for a verdict before getting yourself better.

    I'm so glad you reopened the thread. I was worried for you.
    Please know we are here for you and are not judging you. Tone can be misread on forums, and what is meant can be misconstrued.
    Please stop saying you are selfish etc. you are ill. Not selfish. You are doing your best to try and pull yourself up out of a very deep hole. You are to be commended.

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  7. #314
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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    Hi, thank you so much for your reply... You are right. Can I ask, breaking the "addiction" which I totally agree it is, does that feel like depression? I feel so totally empty and depressed..... Will that ever go away???? I know that sounds silly but I was already having mental health issues before this and this has just added..... No, my daughter won't be little forever and I would hate for this to ever hurt her. I hate myself for everything!! Thank you for taking the time to post....
    I'm glad to see you back I was worried about you. And I'm glad to see you have an appointment with your psych - that's wonderful news and a great step in the right direction. Well done!

    But in answer to your question, yes breaking the addiction can feel like depression. For me, I went through a myriad of feelings: angry that I couldn't submit to my addiction, guilt that I'd gotten that bad in the first place, shame that that was who I'd become, desperation to do it again, feeling like I couldn't go on or think about anything else until I got my fix. It really is so hard to get away from addiction but you can do it. You really can I know you feel absolutely horrible for what's happened, but beating yourself up about it isn't going to do any good sweetie. Acknowledge it was wrong, but focus on what you can do right now and today that's right. The past is done - you can't change it. But you can do your best in the present. It does get easier, I promise. If you ever want to pm me, please do. Hell, if you want to text me, pm me and I'll give you my details. I'd rather you text me than him x

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  9. #315
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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    Hi, do they really take years? What do you mean no further advanced? Sorry I'm a little confused....

    I know I need help.... Underlying reason.. I don't know, he was my doctor & made me feel better & wanted me dependant on him & I stupidly fell into that!!!
    I mean it takes years to get an outcome. The AHPRA doesn't resolve complaints in weeks or months.

    Once they have gotten the information from both parties they can take well over a year to reach a conclusion or recommendation.

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  11. #316
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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    Hi, thank you so much for your reply... You are right. Can I ask, breaking the "addiction" which I totally agree it is, does that feel like depression? I feel so totally empty and depressed..... Will that ever go away???? I know that sounds silly but I was already having mental health issues before this and this has just added..... No, my daughter won't be little forever and I would hate for this to ever hurt her. I hate myself for everything!! Thank you for taking the time to post....
    aww please don't hate yourself, i'm sure you're a delightful kind person! It's awesome of you to re-open this thread, good on you, you need a pat on the back. we are all annonomous here but consider us to all care about you as if we know you in real life.

  12. #317
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    Quote Originally Posted by Minchi View Post
    aww please don't hate yourself, i'm sure you're a delightful kind person! It's awesome of you to re-open this thread, good on you, you need a pat on the back. we are all annonomous here but consider us to all
    care about you as if we know you in real life.

    Thank you, this is really sweet

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  14. #318
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    Quote Originally Posted by IvyRain View Post
    I'm glad to see you back I was worried about you. And I'm glad to see you have an appointment with your psych - that's wonderful news and a great step in the right direction. Well done!

    But in answer to your question, yes breaking the addiction can feel like depression. For me, I went through a myriad of feelings: angry that I couldn't submit to my addiction, guilt that I'd gotten that bad in the first place, shame that that was who I'd become, desperation to do it again, feeling like I couldn't go on or think about anything else until I got my fix. It really is so hard to get away from addiction but you can do it. You really can I know you feel absolutely horrible for what's happened, but beating yourself up about it isn't going to do any good sweetie. Acknowledge it was wrong, but focus on what you can do right now and today that's right. The past is done - you can't change it. But you can do your best in the present. It does get easier, I promise. If you ever want to pm me, please do. Hell, if you want to text me, pm me and I'll give you my details. I'd rather you text me than him x

    Thank you so much for this! It is really helpful (though I am sorry you have ever had to go through what you have).. Very inspiring, so thank you!
    (haha don't give out your number - my track record with my GP is uncool.. lol)

  15. #319
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    Glad you are back.. I don't understand why you need to see his report before writing your own?? Tell the truth. The odds are he will be quick to file his report & may have already done so and as others have said IF he showed you a report its unlikely to be the real report he is lodging. He is still stringing you along & controlling the situation. Do not believe a word this person says to you, everything will be done for his own interest, not yours. That has already been proven. Take care of yourself, lock your phone away & put your energy in to your family.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Undercover001 View Post
    I get what you are saying, that's why I am keeping his texts too. They know I am mentally unwell, he is trying to say I wasn't. If he says I am, it just makes his case worse because, as the medical board says "a patient could take all of there clothes of and offer themselves to a doctor.. Or try to seduce them.. The patient has no legal or ethical obligation. It is only the doctor who does... " the medical board don't care about what the patient does, only the doctor. I am not suing him.
    This is partially true. But due to the fact you have deleted a heap of texts, which he knows, he is going to paint the picture that a crazy clingy woman has contacted him outside of hours, he had politely replied. Then when you lodged the complaint he told you to stop contacting him and you haven't. Especially if you lie in your report to cover his butt, which I'm reading you plan to - you are painting yourself into a corner as basically a stalker that won't leave him alone (now you no longer have the early texts). He will get a slap on the wrist for replying to you, but he won't be de-registered.

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