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  1. #1
    αληθη's Avatar
    αληθη is offline BH name read as Aleethee
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    Default Living on my Own

    Has anyone lived on their own (with no partner/ actually just you) and how did you go?
    I have never lived on my own. I lived with my parents, then with dp then in a share house. I'm thinking when my lease runs out next Feb that I should find my own place but I'm a scardy cat sook wuss and I'll have a 7ish month old bub. I don't know if I'd cope emotionally with bub and no one else around me. I'm a homebody so am really enjoying sharing a house because I have people I know around with me, but I also hate sharing because only two of my housemates are my super close friends (one being dp the other being his best mate who is like a brother). We have a spare room so there's only one other person in the house but she's a smoker (though you're not allowed to smoke in this house), she acts like she's 18 but she's 28 and the bathrooms are always left disgusting and the only part of the cleaning roster she ever follows is vacuuming downstairs so none of her other specified jobs over the other four weeks are ever done (we have one cleaning job a week to do each). I can put up with it until this lease runs out because I will be back and forth between living at my dads and living here while I adjust to having a baby but if she doesn't move out next year I probably should.
    Dp may or may not move out with me. Him and I have a few things to sort out and he's not FOB so if he can't handle bub then he won't stick around. If dp is happy to move out with me then yep I'm super set no problems moving but I'm terrified of living on my own? I'm a bit prone to the blues so if I'm away from people I might fall into that too.

    I've forgotten half of what I've said but how did you go living on your own? Am I just being a sook and is it really no biggie?

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    I lived on my own before moving in with DF and I loved it! If I was you I would give it a go. You need your own space for your family, you don't want to be dealing with share house crap.

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    αληθη  (11-04-2013),MrsSS  (11-04-2013)

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    I have never lived on my own because I am also a scaredy cat wuss

    But I have considered it before and some things that I would need to feel safe:
    - no side access to the house - preferably front only
    - excellent locks on all windows and doors and a security door
    - possibly a flat/unit scenario so there would be others in semi close vicinity
    - possibly an intercom
    - still close to friends/family so if I got lonely I can walk around there
    - a good community area such as a shopping village with good cafes, shops etc

    I think these things would make me feel more secure living alone and with a bub I would definitely prefer this to share housing.

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    αληθη  (11-04-2013)

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    I lived by myself and DD from when she was 6ish months old. It was lonely and I spent a lot of time at my mums anyway. This only lasted for a couple of months until my uncle moved in with us as he moved to our area. Then I met DH anyway

    But I also wouldn't like to be living with people who were messy and feeling like they weren't doing their fair share. I would probably think this was worse.

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    αληθη  (11-04-2013)

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    I lived on my own for about 3 months when ex left when I was pregnant. Ended up moving back home with my parents as I chose to study once bub was born instead of going back to work.

    I loved living on my own! I am a control freak so it was good to do everything my way. I also lived in a townhouse at the time so I was never really 'alone' as such so I didn't get scared in that sense although the first few weeks I couldn't sleep anyway so I would always hear those noises in the night!
    Honestly if I could afford it, I would do it without even thinking, my dd is almost 6 now do I wouldn't be on my own.
    Last edited by mummyrissa; 11-04-2013 at 16:01.

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    Having a young baby can be very isolating, so I personally wouldn't recommend living alone unless your share house situation is really undesirable. I guess in the 7 months before you have to decide you'll get a sense of whether you need company or your own space to focus on your family more. The friends I do have who have had a baby in a share house have had really great experiences, but they had share houses they really loved

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    αληθη  (11-04-2013)

  12. #7
    αληθη's Avatar
    αληθη is offline BH name read as Aleethee
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    I'd be perfectly fine during the day I think but my area (which is the area I'd be looking at) is a bit dodgy being uni suburbs and also the Westpac helicopter is always flying over and helicopters scare me! D: haha.
    I think I would need a lot of what you said too Babyla. I would probably be within walking distance of where I am living now (border of the two suburbs I'd be looking in) and the boys would still live here so I could come round and visit and stuff. All my other friends live 15-30 minutes away and my family aren't around here (dad's closest at nearly 2 hours away).

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    Yep - it's totally ideal. Everything your way! And if you do feel like company you can just call a friend over!

    I wouldn't have it any other way these days...

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    αληθη  (11-04-2013)

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    I lived on my own when DS1 was a baby for close to a year before my now DH moved in.
    It was awesome! I couldn't ever imagine sharing with anyone with a baby.
    I needed the space to clear my head and to just be with DS1 and not worry about anyone but us!

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    αληθη  (11-04-2013),Stiflers Mom  (11-04-2013)

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    I have briefly earlier this year before my flatmate moved in. I didn't like it

    I'm a scaredy cat and jumped at every sound. And it's a bit lonely. I'm just not the type who is happy to live alone, especially now that I've got kids.

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    αληθη  (11-04-2013)


 

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