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  1. #1
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    Default Parents room - am I being unreasonable?

    Today I was in the parents room at my local shopping centre, breastfeeding my baby. I was the only person in there. There was a curtained off area so I was sitting behind that. Someone walked in, sounded like an adult, with no kids. They went to the toilet and left. Then just as I was finishing up, another adult with no kids walked in, went into the toilet (no flush) and as I came our from behind the curtained area, it was one of the centres male cleaners. I'm not sure if he actually used the toilet, but he was in there for a good 5+ minutes. I felt really uncomfortable being in there with him. If it was a dad in there with his kids, I'd have no problem, but I just felt really vulnerable being in there with him on my own, especially with my boob out! As I'm a new mum, I was wondering if its normal for non-parents to be using that toilet? Obviously they can't put up a sign saying "parents / carers only", but I'd think people would just leave that bathroom for parents, I certainly have never used a parents room toilet before becoming a parent. I went to go to the toilet after he'd left and it was unflushed, there was a wee and the remnants from a messy #2. So I held on until I got home.

    I was thinking of contacting the centre to let them know that I appreciate such a nice parents room but felt uncomfortable having their male cleaner in there using that toilet when the men's toilets are about 8-10 steps away... But is that being unreasonable?

  2. #2
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    I think your upset is understandable. If the person who used the loo was a member of staff then Centre Management is in a better position to stop this happening in future than if the person is a member of the public. They have staff toilets for staff...

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    αληθη  (10-04-2013)

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    The cleaner might have been cleaning it or restocking it. I wouldn't complain about cleaners being in there. In general though I think it's odd for people without kids to use parents rooms.

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    Uh gross, I was going to suggest that maybe he was, you know, CLEANING the toilet....until I got to your past bit where he was really in there messing it up. Vom...
    Maybe he thought there was no one in there (if he couldn't see you behind the curtain). Still no excuse for leaving skiddies in the bowl, but just more gross than creepy

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    I think it's a problem a lot of parents rooms have and I remember a lot having trouble with staff going in and using the microwave, I know some had put up notices saying the microwave was not for staff use but they just ignored it. I've never had any problem with male or female being in there with their kids but adults with no kids always used to bug me, I couldn't sit on the chairs as my kids used to kick off the arms with my nipple in their mouths so was always in the open area on the couch and it does make you feel uncomfortable.

    On a side note I don't understand how people (male or female) use the toilet and walk off with no flush. The state I've seen some female toilets is horrific!

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    I've only ever seen female cleaners come in so haven't had that problem.

    That's really gross about it being dirty.

    You could ask centre management about it but I'm not sure what they'd do other than apologise to you.

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    If it's a cleaner, then maybe he was just doing his job?

    As for random people just using parent's room facilities, I've listened to various childless people suggest it to other childless people, so I assume most childless people think it's more than acceptable behaviour.

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    I used a parents room in a really remote part of Myers in Melbourne years ago (before it was knocked down) and as I was leaving (I had just changed DD2's nappy) a really old pervy looking man came in walking around with real purpose. I was alone. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.

    I personally loathe many parents rooms because you are really quite alone in them and often isolated. I've only ever seen female cleaners in them. the one i use at our local shopping centre is very busy and it's the only one I use. Otherwise I breastfeed anywhere but in one.

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    I don't think they could say only people with kids can use them in the same way I regularly use disabled toilets but am not disabled. I use them because I often have several kids with me and it's safer.

    Parents rooms often smell - I'm surprised anyone without kids would want to use one!

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  14. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by SassyMummy View Post
    If it's a cleaner, then maybe he was just doing his job?

    As for random people just using parent's room facilities, I've listened to various childless people suggest it to other childless people, so I assume most childless people think it's more than acceptable behaviour.
    If it was a cleaner doing his job he didn't do a very good one considering he didn't even flush the toilet after someone else had apparently left their remains and not flushed? I thought a cleaner would at least flush the toilet and supposedly clean the toilet. If he went in there to clean I'd like to know what he did clean


 

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