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  1. #1
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    Default How do you help yourself wean? 😥

    I always said I would BF until DS was ready to stop.

    Thing is he decided he's ready to stop at 17 months, all of a sudden, just complete breast refusal!

    I just wasn't mentally prepared for this. I thought we had so much more time. I thought that it would be slow and gradual not cold turkey! I guess he thought differently.

    DH keeps reassuring me that this is a good thing, much easier for him to just decide to stop than for us to wean him before he's ready.

    It started a few weeks ago but he had teeth cutting so I just convinced myself that he just wanted cold soy milk from the fridge to cool his mouth. Kept offering him BF thinking he would come back to it.....he hasn't.

    Now I'm having to suddenly adjust to the fact that our bf journey has come to its end.

    In theory I am fine with it. He is a happy confident little guy and I still get lots of cuddles and kisses from him. He just doesn't need this from me anymore.

    I guess I just hadn't realised how much I had tied my worth as his mother to the fact I could BF him. I now realise that deep down I still have feelings of failure linked to emergency CS and all the difficulties we've had with his sleep. BF was the thing I felt I had done well.

    Sorry for the ramble just needed to voice all the nonsense in my head.

    DH is very supportive but he just doesn't 'get' all my failure feelings.

    Any others have this experience?

    How long did it take you to adjust to being weaned?

  2. #2
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    Also forgot to ask... Should I be expressing now that he isn't feeding to prevent mastitis or is that unnecessary?

    Prior to him stopping he was feeding morning and at bedtime....

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    Thanks MM! A new bra is great idea!

    He was only having two feeds, first thing in morning and last thing at night.

    No full feeling yet, had a little leaking yesterday but not much.

    Thanks for words of support and advice.

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    can't imagine how you're feeling

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    giggle berry  (09-04-2013)

  6. #5
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    threechooks is offline If my spelling annoys you that's your problem.... I have better things to do than proofread !
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    I could have written your post word for word, last year. DD did the same at 13mths, went from 6 feeds in a 24 hr period to nothing, complete refusal. I withheld other fluids, I kept offering every half hour for 2 weeks. I did skin to skin. I tried everything. I was in a lot of pain, had a lot of engorgement. I expressed just a little, once a day for comfort. Majority of my supply went by two weeks. I know how you feel, it terrible when mum isn't ready . People close to me didn't understand either, they said I should be happy I got to 12 mths. I grieved for my BF relationship and couldn't see anyone BF for quite awhile as it made me teary. When I here 'experts' say that babies/toddlers don't self wean I want to punch them in the face

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    giggle berry  (09-04-2013)

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    threechooks, I am completely on the same page! People around me had been making comments for a long time that he is too old to be BFing still, so they think I should be happy, feel free!

    Trust BH to put me in touch with those who can relate to the concept of grieving the loss of my BF relationship!

    👍

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    threechooks  (09-04-2013)

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    DS1 did this at 18 months exactly. I was about to offer him his bedtime feed and he just climbed into bed and went to sleep. I was sad but like your DH said, he did it when he was ready! I really missed our bf cuddles for awhile.

    Well done for getting to 17 months!

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    giggle berry  (09-04-2013)


 

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