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  1. #101
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantingtostart View Post
    Yes I absolutely would. I have always went into a relationship saying I want a large family. If a decade later when we're married and my time is running out, my husband has a change of heart, why wouldn't I?
    Firstly, thanks for answering. I get it could be tough when majority of opinions are strongly going the other way

    Quote Originally Posted by wantingtostart View Post
    Well I would deserve it for leading him on. I could get an abortion if he did that anyway.
    This quote was your response to the holes poked in condoms statement. It in particular caught me.

    Do you not see how unfair it is. Don't get me wrong, if your (or mine/anyone's) partner poked a hole in a condom it would be a massive breach of trust and incredibly deceitful, but you've always got 'back up', so to speak.

    What could your partner do if you tricked him and fell pregnant? He couldn't do anything but accept it. I just don't think it's ok in any way, shape or form.

    Thanks for answering again and been so honest

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  3. #102
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    LifeInShadesOfGrey is offline Just a little bit silly :)
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantingtostart View Post
    Well I would deserve it for leading him on. I could get an abortion if he did that anyway.
    Ive held off posting but i cant ignore the above quote.

    If he trapped you, you could just get an abortion.

    But if you trapped him, he has no way of escape, or say in what you would do.

    That's selfish. If you weren't happy then you find someone who wants the same you do.




    Sent from my Unicorn.

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  5. #103
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantingtostart View Post
    Well I would deserve it for leading him on. I could get an abortion if he did that anyway.
    It's funny that you mention abortion. A man does not have that choice.

    People change their minds about many things over time. If your dh decided he didn't want any more children after, say, 2 and you had previously discussed having, say, 4 that doesn't mean he has done wrong by you. If you then aren't happy with his change of heart and you can come to a mutual agreement, tricking him into having more children is not at all okay... EVER!

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  7. #104
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    When DH and I got together And right up til a year ago he always wanted a big family (he's 1 of 7 I'm 1 of 4 kids) whereas I always said one was enough I compromised on two. Now we are both content on two being enough. There are times where he wants more ( he quickly changes his mind) but two for us is it. Done. Finished. I would never ever forgive him for tricking me into more. Maybe your partner changed their mind like mine. People are entitled to do so. Kids are not easy. And people no when is enough for them. Talk these things through before being dishonest. It's not like you can't find someone else who would like a big family. I just don't think it's worth potentially losing a relationship over and I think people really need to think about the consequences of their actions.

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  9. #105
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantingtostart View Post
    Well I would deserve it for leading him on. I could get an abortion if he did that anyway.
    That is by far the most childish and selfish comment I have ever read. I feel bad for your husband. You really need to grow up.

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  11. #106
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    Lol, I love the concept of "go and find another man who does want children" like you just pick one up off the shelf at the supermarket.

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  13. #107
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    Lol, I love the concept of "go and find another man who does want children" like you just pick one up off the shelf at the supermarket.
    Finding another man who wants a big family is better then trapping and lying and losing said partner anyway. I just can't get my head around the whole concept of if a man tricks a women she'll take "care" oh it if she wants but when the roles reversed a man just has to deal with it.

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  15. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    Lol, I love the concept of "go and find another man who does want children" like you just pick one up off the shelf at the supermarket.
    Yep. I can imagine being in your mid to late thirties and already having one or two children but wanting one more or so.

    The time needed to get divorced, meet someone like minded, get to know them, re partner, then go on to have more children. All providing the new partner likes your current kids and vice versa.

    For these women I understand the NEED to 'trap' another kid out of their partner. Its much easier and less time consuming.

  16. #109
    αληθη's Avatar
    αληθη is offline BH name read as Aleethee
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    Lol, I love the concept of "go and find another man who does want children" like you just pick one up off the shelf at the supermarket.
    I oddly have found way more men who want kids than who don't but yes I agree it does sound a little silly . Still better than trapping a guy who doesn't want more though.

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  18. #110
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    AdornedWithCats is offline Winner 2013 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    Lol, I love the concept of "go and find another man who does want children" like you just pick one up off the shelf at the supermarket.
    My mum picked one out of a singles magazine

    Fyi...the time it takes to separate/divorce/find a new man who likes your kids and wants to start ttc depends on the people involved. As i said before, it took my mum 15 months from her first husband walking out on her to her and my dad conceiving my brother...both of them were in their 30s. So it is possible.
    Last edited by AdornedWithCats; 07-04-2013 at 15:06.


 

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