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  1. #91
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Crow View Post
    Please don't attack Wantingtostart for simply answering the subject with her point of view.
    While i and most of us on this thread do not agree with her opinion, i am grateful she had the guts to post it. I am always so disappointed in the way women attack each other, especially on bubhub.

    Wanting to start, thank you for providing a point of view from the other side of the arguement
    I usually try and be diplomatic in threads like these, but things like that make my blood boil because it flies in the face of bodilly autonomy of both sexes and takes away what little rights men have in regards to reproduction.

    Or would people be okay with a man slipping his pregnant girlfriend the abortion drug and letting her think it was a natural miscarriage?

    Its on the same level of abhorent for me and my morals.

    Sent from my HUAWEI-U8850 using BubHub

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  3. #92
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    If Dh suddenly decided to have no more children I would then leave contraception up to him from that second on. He doesn't want kids then he needs to stop them.

    I would not want a blended family so its either his kids or no more kids.

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    Annabella  (04-05-2013)

  5. #93
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantingtostart View Post
    Perhaps is was deceitful for my husband to tell me he wants a large family for so long, then suddenly change his mind. His needs and wants are not greater than mine.
    People are entitled to change their minds having a large family can be very difficult finacial, physically and emotional.
    There are a lot of things I thought I would do 10 years ago that I no longer want. Maybe after 1 or 2 kids he has changed his mind he is entitled to that you are not entitled to lie and betray him and force children upon him.
    If you are fine altering his life by lies and betrayal then you should have no issue if he ever betrays you in any way.

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    Guest654  (07-04-2013)

  7. #94
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post
    If Dh suddenly decided to have no more children I would then leave contraception up to him from that second on. He doesn't want kids then he needs to stop them.

    I would not want a blended family so its either his kids or no more kids.
    I agree with this with the condition that he made the decisions for no more children without discussing it with me and making a mutual decision. If he just said that's it no more and I'd been expecting more, then it's his responsibility to ensure there's no more

  8. #95
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post
    If Dh suddenly decided to have no more children I would then leave contraception up to him from that second on. He doesn't want kids then he needs to stop them.

    I would not want a blended family so its either his kids or no more kids.
    This is us...after 2 kids we decided no more and I told him I'm done with bc so it's up to you, we now have 5 lol. I'm waiting for the mirena but between now and then it's still up to him

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  10. #96
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    Quote Originally Posted by wantingtostart View Post
    Yes I absolutely would. I have always went into a relationship saying I want a large family. If a decade later when we're married and my time is running out, my husband has a change of heart, why wouldn't I?
    Because it's dishonest and disrespectful. If you didn't want anymore children you'd expect your husband to respect your decision, wouldn't you? If my husband poked holes in his condoms and I fell pregnant, there would be world war 3. Nobody should be able to get away with something like that. It's a very selfish thing to do.

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  12. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post
    If Dh suddenly decided to have no more children I would then leave contraception up to him from that second on. He doesn't want kids then he needs to stop them.

    I would not want a blended family so its either his kids or no more kids.
    If he knows you have stopped contraception and you have said it is up to him then there is no issue. You being upfront and honest.
    The ball is in his court you are not deceiving him.

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  14. #98
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    I just think that's its okay for people to change their minds. It's not easy looking after/supporting children.

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  16. #99
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    Quote Originally Posted by SugarSkull View Post
    Because it's dishonest and disrespectful. If you didn't want anymore children you'd expect your husband to respect your decision, wouldn't you? If my husband poked holes in his condoms and I fell pregnant, there would be world war 3. Nobody should be able to get away with something like that. It's a very selfish thing to do.
    Agree with this.

    Pregnancy is god awful for me. Ive really struggled through all 3 of my pregnancies. If my DH did something like this to me I would feel he obviously has no love or respect for me and my feelings if he could so easily put them aside in favour of his own wants and needs.

    I couldnt do it to my husband because I would be terrified that I would lose him if he found out. I wouldnt do anything to jepordise our relationship like that, he is too important to me and our children we already have.

  17. #100
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    Nobody's wants are more important than anothers. Not when it comes to something permanent like kids vs no kids (or few kids vs many kids).

    It's not something you can easily compromise on, so that's where you act like a mature adult and decide that perhaps if kids/more kids are ESSENTIAL to your life, then you need to find yourself a different person to make those children with. You need to decide if your relationship with that person is more important than having/not having those kids. If having more/having no more is more important, then leave the relationship.

    You can decide that another person should/shouldn't have kids just because YOU want it that way. That's the most selfish, stupid thing you could do.

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