My DS was a biter. He bit at daycare and I used to hate going to pick him up wondering if there was an incident report to be signed, once he bit 4 times in one day. He's growing out of it now but nothing I did could change his behavior. They never tell me who he bit. It's very hard but very age appropriate. The cearers do everything they can to be vigilant and intervene quickly. My DS has also been on the reviving end and it is hard to see them come home with bite marks. It think it's innapropriate that the biter should leave especially if it is she appropriate. I would hope the center is providing you with incident reports and following their own guidelines.
By your standard...my DD is a little sh#t...and I assure you she is a wonderful, amazing little person and that she is well loved and there are consequences for biting...it is a stage!
Indeed River Song
Pesca77 I suggest you do a little research about `typical child development'
As a mother of a biter, and a child who has been bitten in care, I can see both sides but blaming a parent for a 2 year old biting and saying they arent being raised right really gets my goat. My DS2 is a biter. He bites when people/children are in his personal space and he feels like he cant escape. Not an excuse to let the behaviour slide which we certainly don't but he is far from being a little $hi7!! We are working on it but his sensory issues are making it difficult for us.
OP, it certainly isnt nice when your child is the one being bitten and by all means keep up communication with the centre ti make sure they are doing their upmost to take control of the situation but also tey to remember that this other child is just that, a child and their parents are most likely mortified by it, even if they dont show that and im sure they want the situation resolved as well. Its definitely not nice hearing that your child has bitten someone and its even worse wheb people tar them as horrible children because theu are exibiting an undesirable behaviour - they are still learning and growing and some kids are biters. I dont believe a 2 year old can be a "horrible" child. They are not malicious.
My son was also a biter when he was around 18 mth. Awful. I have 5 kids and he is the only one to have bitten - it is NOTHING to do with parenting (not saying I'm a perfect parent, just that this one isn't on me lol). The daycare people had to watch him like a hawk and have strategies in place as he was randomly nipping. They said he would go for one child as she shrieked a lot and gave him a reaction which unfortunately reinforced the behaviour.
Ultimately he just grew out of it when his eye teeth finished coming through and his language jmproved. I don't think any of my efforts made much difference.
Just putting across another POv.
Pesca I hate to say it but your son isn't biting because he was exposed to it by another child - it's just a typical behaviour!
My son was being bitten constantly by the same child. It was in the 3 - 4 age group so at that age it should have passed. Every parent and carer wanted the child removed from the centre. My son is above average in all areas especially socially. So I explained to him that maybe the child biting him didn't feel safe and comfortable when playing with him. I asked DS to make an extra effort with this child and instead of waiting for the child to get upset and angry and march over and bite my DS that he should seek him out and play, chat and befriend him so he doesn't get the chance to get upset and feel the need to bite. All i know is that when i explained to my DS that there might be a reason behind the behaviour he was willing to help. The biter in that centre no longer bites (we are talking a bad biter who ripped skin off) and he is finally adjusted. Not sure if your child is of the age where you can give this direction. But if they are sometimes it is easier to give your child helpful tools to rectify the situation themselves rather than getting angry and upset. The parents of the child biting are probably more horrified and upset than you.
However before you all jump down my throat, please read the part where I described the mothers response! I also reiterated that the child can't be blamed because it's due to bad parenting.
The 'mums of biters' have all expressed sadness and frustration at not being able to control your LO's behaviour - but you are at least trying and aware it's bad. Riversong you mention consequences even.
This mum constantly laughed every time she was pulled to the Directors office about yet another incident & refused to try and discipline or do anything at home and said 'kids are just being kids'.
So I stand by my original opinion - bad parenting. But it's not a reflection of all biters - my adorable niece was one too.
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