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  1. #21
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    The first study is about cry it out techniques, which have nothing to do with controlled crying at all. It is nowhere near the same thing, with cc you still go in as often as every minute to pat your baby on the bum so they know you are there etc. you just don't pick them up.

    The second takes information from studies done as far back as 1976 and the latest is done in 2000. It also says that the studies used are not specifically for control crying as there have not been any studies undertaken on control crying at that point in time.

    The link I posted is the closest thing to a study that anyone has done at this point.



    Quote Originally Posted by missie_mack View Post
    Last time I checked this wasn't fact either. This was based on asking parents to fill in a survey on whether there baby was sleeping at 4 months and basically again at 6 years to see if they were ok.... not really the gold standard of science!

    But here is a study that involves science, not opinion
    http://research.unt.edu/news/unt-res...sleep-training

    And a position paper about controlled crying
    www.aaimhi.org/inewsfiles/controlled_crying.pdf

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  3. #22
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    Hardly an opinion piece
    http://www.nhs.uk/news/2012/09Septem...or-babies.aspx

    This explains exactly what methods were used in the study that I posted.

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  5. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by beebs View Post
    Hardly an opinion piece
    http://www.nhs.uk/news/2012/09Septem...or-babies.aspx

    This explains exactly what methods were used in the study that I posted.
    Exactly, it's the largest longidtudinal study done in this area. It is also not an 'opinion' piece.

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  7. #24
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    True missie, but it even says in the study not to use it as an excuse to close the door on a crying baby and not come back. There are very strict rules when doing cc properly. That is what they are talking about.

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    It puzzles me to read that your DS could self settle for months and now he totally 'unlearnt' it. Makes me wonder is teaching self settling is really worth it esp when it involves so much tears and stress both mum and bub and then having bub, to forget it every time they hit a new milestone or go on a holiday.

    Having said this I do read lots mums saying there were more stress and tears re sleep before the training compared to during the training. So it may be worth it when you see the quality of sleep everyone is getting at the end. Also mum must be comfortable with what she's doing...set her own threshold..whether it's 1 min or 10 mins...watching the clock is so important cos 1 min may sound like an eternity!

    I really don't know if my bub can self settle. Though he goes to his cot wo protests after gradually training these two months..I will still sshh pat when he cries cos its so hard to hear him cry. But he still cries every night within 1-2 hours after going to bed (no matter if I put him down earlier or later) and at 4ish am! And we have to bring him to our bed so all of us can continue to sleep till 645am or 7am. Other times he whinges in his sleep he can continue sleeping. DH and I are quite tired of this..it's like bub has two set alarm clocks in him.

    So last night we decided to let him cry at those two times till he self-settled. Actually wasn't real crying...more whining punctuated with few seconds of loud cries..at 1130pm it lasted intermittently about 20mins. Don't judge me he's not hungry cos he took 210ml at 8pm followed by 90ml at 9pm...that's 300ml. In the day he can last 4 hours with just 180ml each time. At 4ish am he whined for 12 mins. I was fully awake to make sure he didn't bump his head against the cot sides or rolled onto his tummy etc and I was watching the clock and listening to his whines/cries. He then slept..till 710am.

    We have been dealing with these two wakings for these few months and its high time we allow some crying with the hope of eradicating these wakings. I truly believe we jumped to attend to him too soon each time, more so as he was sleeping in our room and we are light sleepers. we should have given him the chance to self settle. I read that attending to baby too soon ruin the chance for them to self settle and also reinforce the habit of waking at those times.

    When he woke at 710am I offered him milk and he didn't seem too hungry so I reckon his wakings weren't due to hunger. He's of good weight and taking solids now. I do make sure I rule out everything such as hunger, wind, pain, temperature etc before I allow him to cry. It's not easy but I guess I have to do it at one point or other if this continues.

    I do hope he will not forget what he has learnt! And tonight gets better!

    Sorry I don't think I shared anything about CC, more my own experience. I would say do what you deem as comfortable. It's really tough for you now esp when you have had him so good for 7.5months.

  9. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by btmac View Post
    I am not convinced that the motivations behind it are about teaching your child to be an independent self settler as opposed to satisfying a parent's own need for uninterrupted sleep.
    See to me, those two things aren't mutually exclusive.
    I don't think CC is optimal, and I don't think I could do it. I think it is probably detrimental to a baby's wellbeing.
    But we ALL make choices in regards to our children that aren't optimal. Some formula feed, some send their children to childcare for long hours, some let them watch more than a little bit of tv. Most of the time, we do these things because we have weighed up our needs and our child's needs and for whatever reason, our needs trump theirs on the issue.
    I admit, I judge when someone uses CC just to train a baby to sleep, but if the baby is sleeping terribly, the parents are desperately sleep deprived and nothing else is working, I think it is the lesser evil by far.

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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    See to me, those two things aren't mutually exclusive.
    I don't think CC is optimal, and I don't think I could do it. I think it is probably detrimental to a baby's wellbeing.
    But we ALL make choices in regards to our children that aren't optimal. Some formula feed, some send their children to childcare for long hours, some let them watch more than a little bit of tv. Most of the time, we do these things because we have weighed up our needs and our child's needs and for whatever reason, our needs trump theirs on the issue.
    I admit, I judge when someone uses CC just to train a baby to sleep, but if the baby is sleeping terribly, the parents are desperately sleep deprived and nothing else is working, I think it is the lesser evil by far.
    I agree to an extent. I had to resort to this when my DS1 was waking numerous times at night and standing in his cot and wanting our attention! We didn't have any choice. We didn't want him to cry and we never let him, until it drove us so desperate. I am not using this as an excuse but at that time DH and I didn't know what else to try. I was on the verge of tears that allowing him to cry will hurt him. I had wanted to rush to him but had to hold back. I was imagining all sort of horrible things just letting him cry.After one or two nights (can't rem exactly now) everything improved. And today he is not mentally or emotionally damaged. He's a confident (over confident more like it) happy goofy little bloke.

    And with this bubba I do not wish the same thing to happen, at least try to nip things in the bud if possible, and not wait till he can climb out of his cot. Cos I have an older child when needs my attention too. Can't be a grumpy tired mum whole day. Fortunately he's not as persistent as his brother...maybe cos we have tried to start things on a better footing this time armed with more knowledge and understanding.
    Last edited by Mom2TwoDSs; 28-03-2013 at 09:15.

  11. #28
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    I used CC with my elder two. The first was about 6 months old and the second 4 months old.
    It took 3 days for both babies to self settle and not rely on me to rock them or pat them. Pretty sure those three days didn't scar them for life and they are two pretty fantastic sleepers.
    The eldest slept 13 hours a night from around 7 months and up to a 5 hour nap still at 4 years old.
    The middle one slept 12 hours a night from 4 months old and 14 hours a night at 6 months and napped 3 hours up until he was 4.
    Then I had my guilty baby who was born with 1 kidney so I had the guilts and wouldn't let him cry.
    He has been a sh&t sleeper from 4 months old and still at 2.5 if he wakes in the night he expects us to come in to settle him.
    Looks like CC could have worked in my favor if I did it again.
    I personally am an awful mother when I function on no sleep. I snap and scream and get frustrated at everything and I tend to get sooky .
    So I don't believe 3 nights of CC is awful, mind you I don't leave my baby for longer that 10 minutes and if the cry changes from a simple grizzle to a bit of hysteria I am in there quickly.
    I never let my baby scream is out, I believe there is a difference between a cry for attention and a cry for a reason.

  12. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mom2TwoDSs View Post
    It puzzles me to read that your DS could self settle for months and now he totally 'unlearnt' it. Makes me wonder is teaching self settling is really worth it esp when it involves so much tears and stress both mum and bub and then having bub, to forget it every time they hit a new milestone or go on a holiday.
    This is a really good point - baby's can have lots of sleep regressions in the first year. I know we hit them all. When we let go and accepted that this is how it is, our lives got better because we just stopped fighting what was a natural thing.

    In saying that, I'm not for or against it, we tried 'versions' of it but ultimately it didn't really work for us, do what works for your family.

    I believe that a baby is part of a family unit and everyone's needs are important.

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    Quote Originally Posted by btmac View Post
    I am not convinced that the motivations behind it are about teaching your child to be an independent self settler as opposed to satisfying a parent's own need for uninterrupted sleep.
    That is actually pretty offensive, you don't know anyones individual situation. As I said, I had two newborns, one which took all of my attention 24 hours a day 7 days a week, and one who got almost no attention from me. To me that was far worse than CC. Far, far worse. As I said, I did by the book, timed, in and out and patting on the bum, I never just let him cry it out.

    There are actually studies that show that PND is less in women who CC.

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