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  1. #31
    threechooks's Avatar
    threechooks is offline If my spelling annoys you that's your problem.... I have better things to do than proofread !
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    Quote Originally Posted by mama and her little bear View Post
    And if you do the right and the child goes crazy off the rails?
    Sorry I don't understand what you are saying? Are you trying to say 'As a parent you do all the right things and your child still goes off the rails' I think that is highly unlikely that you do all the right things and your child goes off the rails. If your child has issues, you have gone wrong somewhere. Even if it is something small like being too permissive.

  2. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by threechooks View Post
    Sorry I don't understand what you are saying? Are you trying to say 'As a parent you do all the right things and your child still goes off the rails' I think that is highly unlikely that you do all the right things and your child goes off the rails. If your child has issues, you have gone wrong somewhere. Even if it is something small like being too permissive.
    You're kidding me right? As I have said several times, children get to an age where their peers are much more influential than their parents. If you have a child that doesn't fit in easy and suddenly has friends that show them attention, they will generally want to please them and in some cases, unfortunately, that isn't a good thing.

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  4. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by threechooks View Post
    Sorry I don't understand what you are saying? Are you trying to say 'As a parent you do all the right things and your child still goes off the rails' I think that is highly unlikely that you do all the right things and your child goes off the rails. If your child has issues, you have gone wrong somewhere. Even if it is something small like being too permissive.
    I disagree. Teenagers exercise free will, sometimes they take it too far. Not every mistake a kid makes has to mean the parents did something wrong. Lots of teens with D&A addictions and issues with the law come from loving, supportive families. I will agree many that act out have a bad home life, I know I did. But not every wayward teen can blame their parents.

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  6. #34
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    If the parents negligence has obviously contributed to the kid being. $hit... Then I can see any problem with them being forced to do parenting classes as the article outlines. If the parent has honestly tried their best and their kid is still doing $hitty things then I can't see a problem with them being forced (as a family) to go to counsellIng as the article suggests.

  7. #35
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    Busy-Bee is offline Offending people since before Del :D
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    If the teenager has $hit parents then the parents should be held responsible for being $hit parents, they are still not responsible for the teen's delinquent actions. Who decides the scale of being a $hit parent?

    It is extraordinary simplistic to believe that delinquent teen must mean $hit parents. One of the things my brother used to do was sneak out at night and, well, lets just say it wasn't legal. My parents had no idea as he went to bed and was back in his bead before they got up.

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  9. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    So now other siblings must pay financially by not being able to do a sport bc their brother or sister did the wrong thing? Again, you are promoting that others take the responsibility and fall out from their actions.
    Actually the garnishing I was talking about was in response to someone else saying to garnish the teens income when they get some.

    Quote Originally Posted by threechooks View Post
    I can see the Op's point though. When a juvenile smashes the glass on a council bus shelter, who pays? Not the parent, Not the child... that's right folks the rate payers. Where is the responsibilty. If I end up raising a little Sh**t, I will certainly stand up, own up and claim him as my problem, not societies.

    exactly if my 13 year old son (who cant have a job) breaks a businesses window or hits a car with a rock someone has to pay that. That would be me tax payers cant cover everything for us

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    I actually had the police come into my workplace once after there'd been a spate of vandalism. Anyway, they actually pushed us to not press charges for the damage to the office as it was a couple of young boys who had *never* done anything else bad in their life, straight A students, absolutely mortified and upset parents and the boys themselves were extremely remorseful after simply having been spoken to by the police.

    To think that their loving, caring, attentive parents are seen as bad parents by some who should be financially burdened for their sons making a stupid, once-off, mistake is just beyond my comprehension and is just illogical to me.

    I find it odd that people assume that because they are 'good' parents their kids will never act out. I think we need to be prepared for the fact that while our children are loved, educated and disciplined when necessary that is no guarantee that they will never make a mistake or get in with the wrong crowd. I'm prepared for it and refuse to bury my head in the sand and presume that naughty kids = bad parents.

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  12. #38
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    Oh heck no! Punish the kid I say! They either have parents that have tried everything so won't listen anyway or they have parents who don't care so won't care to attempt discipline. Our step daughter skipped school when we were at work, went into my bedroom, stole jewellery and my car keys then took my car for a joy ride and when she got back, crashed it into our garage (which was loaded up with all furniture after our house flooded the week prior). Do you know what the police did? Nothing.

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    Sorry, but this is just not true, people go off the rails for many reasons. Abuse, mental illness, grief. You could do all the right things and still end up with a child who goes off the rails.

    Or should we fine parents if their child has mental illness? After all, sometimes it is genetic.

    Quote Originally Posted by threechooks View Post
    Sorry I don't understand what you are saying? Are you trying to say 'As a parent you do all the right things and your child still goes off the rails' I think that is highly unlikely that you do all the right things and your child goes off the rails. If your child has issues, you have gone wrong somewhere. Even if it is something small like being too permissive.

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    Boot camp at Lavarack should fix a few issue i reckon.

    But no i dont think parents should pay for the kids actions. I dont think it teachs the kids anything other then there not resposnsible for their own actions someone else is


 

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