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  1. #1
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    Default 11 week old sleeps 20min blocks. That's it.

    please tell me that my 11 week old sleeping 20min blocks all day and not wanting to go back to sleep no matter what i do is completely normal and he's going to improve. He wakes once at night but takes 3hrs to get to sleep for the night. He's awake at 5am and i bring him to bed with us so we can all get more sleep. Otherwise we would be starting the day from 5am.
    If its not normal, it seems i have the same sleep issues i had with dd - who we had to get a sleep specialist come to our home to help us out, only then she improved after 4mths of visits.
    He's fully breastfed and we dont have feeding issues.
    I just need some support here.
    I dont get a break during the day. The constant rocking and settling is bloody exhausting. Hearing him 'cry it out' breaks my heart and i get anxious. And 'crying it out' only makes him totally distressed as we tried this for the first time last night after 2hrs of trying to get him off to sleep. DH was really frustrated last night and had to go outside to calm down, i was almost in tears mainly from dealing with it all day then having to put up with it at night too.

    Whats even more frustrating is that i stick to my guns with a sleep time routine. i communicate with dh so he does that same as i do. Everthing is consistant. His room is dark for sleeps, music is played to drown out sudden noises. We follow feed, play, feed, sleep. He is swaddled for every sleep. I keep him up for 2hr max but usually 1.5hrs is his ideal time. But 20mins is all i get. I allow him time to self settle, i allow him to grizzle before i go in and start assisting him - the same techniques are used as i know swapping what i do to settle him confuses him.

    I want to enjoy my baby but yet again lak of sleep issues are taking over. de ja vu of my 1st bub. U'd think i'd have learnt from that but i just cant firgure out what we are doing wrong here.

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    so i spent 45 mins getting him down for a sleep that included feeding him to sleep which didnt work. he slept for 20 mins on the dot. now is wide awake, no signs of wanting to go back to sleep.

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    Hi there! Big hugs it is very exhausting! My ds was exactly the same. Some days he refused to sleep at all at that age. Then he moved to 3x30min naps a day- which was frustrating to rock for an hr only to get 30mins :/
    We visited a sleep school & taught him how to self settle. So he would put himself to sleep but still only 30mins. He did this for months & months then finally he starting sleeping longer. I honestly just think some bubs are better sleepers than others. I don't have much advice for you as it sounds like your doing everything you can. Just feel assured that you're definately not the only mother to go through this! You'll get there!

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    Yep, I have to agree. My DS did this at about the same stage and it practically KILLED me! 20 minute cat naps at best, the second I'd nod off for a nap myself after finally getting him settled he'd be awake again.
    It's certainly pretty shattering.

    Do you have a swing or a rocker that you can try popping your bub in for that settling phase? DS slept for all of his naps in his bouncer. There were a few times where I'd wake up from a short nap and I was still bouncing his rocker with my foot after doing it in my sleep .
    Perhaps he's in need of some extra food? One of my friends followed a paed's advice and started trying to get her LO to go up to four hours without a feed as that's the 'average' time. Nope, no dice. He became really restless and wouldn't nap for more than a short period at a time.
    When she went back to feeding on demand he went back to napping for longer. Sure, he was feeding more often but sleeping better so she could get some rest too.

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    you're doing nothing wrong lovely, please don't think that. If it helps at all, this week H has gotten a bit better- I can settle her in her cot now and today after 40 minutes resettling she slept for a second sleep cycle.
    He will probably get there in the end. I'm sorry I don't have any more advice, just encouragement and sympathy.
    Are you sure you don't want to try sleep school?

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    how does the sleep school teach them to self settle? and whats stopping me from doing it in my home without spending the rediculous $$$ ???
    My mum offered to make a trip to help me out for a few days. She got ds to sleep in 5mins just by rocking him in the rocking chair. She couldnt for the life of her, settle him back to sleep aftr that 20mins. So its not just me!!
    He self settles during the night, if he wakes. He will self settle during an overnight feed if i put him in his bed awake. i know he can self settle. he just wont during the day or for bedtime at night.
    i dont even care if he wont self settle. my dd didnt for ages. i just cant even get him to go to sleep anymore and sleep a full sleep cycle! he used to, but the last month his sleeping has decreased heaps.
    ive been laing here for an hr feeding him. he had that 20min nap my mum got him down for and hes still wide awake while feeding. like this morning, no signs of going back to sleep. if i get him fully up he will last 30mins before hes ranky again, so i know he needs more sleep.
    It must be the age for it. i need to stop beating myself up. its frustrATING tho. especially in the evenings when my dinners go cold, dh and i tag team when he wakes each 10-20mins and we are not even eating together anymore.

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    You're doing nothing wrong and it's completely normal. I had the same thing with DD only she would only sleep in my arms or with physical contact (ie, a boob). I really struggled with coping with her because a standard day was 2 x 20 min sleeps, she was ALWAYS with me. She hated baby gyms, swings, bassinettes etc.

    Oh, and chuck the whole sleep routine thing away, let them sleep when they are tired. If baby isn't tired then there is no point forcing the issue - you will just end up more stressed. Google "wakeful babies'.

    I found DD loved being all snugly in a pouch sling as well, she would sleep longer in there but I would often have to move around for this to work.

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    DS1 did this and DD does this as well.....only DS2 was the better sleeper.

    I resigned myself to teh fact that I was only every going to get 20 - 30 min naps during the day as there was nothing I could do to get him and her to sleep. I would pat, rock, feed, etc, etc and nothing would work.

    What was good for DS1 was I would go for a walk in the morning for his first sleep and he would sleep the whole hour as he was constantly being rocked the whole time. Maybe you could try that for one of his sleeps so he gets a bigger block?

    DS1 is a champion sleeper....basically the older he got the better he was.

    DD on the other hand is a crap sleeper....and I am just hoping she gets better as she get older!

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    At 11 weeks my bub was exactly the same n I was a mess because of it. She is now 5 months n just grew out of it. I stuck to my routine and communication cues for a bit over a month and something must have worked. Somedays she'll catnap but most she has a good sleep. A booked called the dream baby guide by sheyne rowley helped me sooo much! It's for babies over 6 months but I used the settle cues n communication the same.

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    Are you wrapping/not wrapping him? Perhaps the opposite of what you're doing would help??

    What about a dummy? Are you using one?


 

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