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  1. #51
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    Waterlily - unfortunately a lot of people do equate $$ and power with worth. Sad, but true.

    Not everyone though.

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  3. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by OurLittleBlessing View Post
    Waterlily - unfortunately a lot of people do equate $$ and power with worth. Sad, but true.

    Not everyone though.
    That's something that I find really upsetting. Everyone has worth.

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  5. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimberleygal1 View Post
    mmmm I'm curious to know how a child would benefit with having a stay at home parent if the kids are at school? What would the point be? I for one would be bored being at home on my own with the kids at school, I would rather be out working but that's just me. I don't need to work financially, I choose to because I love my work.

    Dh works away, I work 4 days full days a week with 1 child in school currently. The second is in daycare the 4 days a week and the 5th day is our day together which I love. I don't find it hard to juggle, you just have to find that routine. Nor do I have family anywhere near close by to call on. I just manage.

    My day goes a bit like this;
    5am- get out of bed (ds2 is an early riser but ds2 may sleep in til 5.30)
    I have a shower and get ready
    5.40 - Breakfast for all including feeding the 3 furry family members
    6.00 - Kids dressed, teeth and hair brushed, pack ds1's lunch in his bag
    6.15 - watch a bit of tv, quick tidy up of dishes etc from the morning.
    6.50 - Out of the door
    7.00 - drop ds1 to wait for the bus to school
    7.10 - drop ds2 off at daycare and spend time reading etc with him
    7.30 - I am at work and ready to start
    I work through lunch. Finish at 3-3.30 depending on if I have had a break through the day.
    DS1 finishes at 2.20pm and goes home with a friend 2 days a week and has after school care 2 days a week. If he had to come back to work with me for an hour he would be able to and has done.
    I pick ds up by 3.30 and ds2 up by 4pm. I have time to zip to the shops if need be. I also have a few hours of daylight left to enjoy time with the kids before dinner at 6pm, bath,and bed by 7pm for ds2 and 7.30pm for ds1. I make ds's lunch and pack their bags when they are in bed and have clothes ready for all of us for the next day. Usually on Sunday morning I cook bulk meals and freeze for occassions during the week so I don't have to cook every night. The weeks dh is home it's that little bit easier as he is very productive and hands on.

    I also struggle when people suggest daycare fees are expensive, I don't think they are, not when a majority would be eligible for the ccb and the ccr and those not eligible for the ccb such as myself still get the ccr which is quite a cut leaving the oop manageable. Last year my oop for 2 in daycare was $330 per week which we didn't see as expensive. This year I have 1 less in daycare but school fees, excursions etc instead.
    Sorry, but I am not going to get into the nitty gritty of that question. I have a feeling it would not end well.

    I'm happy for you that you are pleased with the way things work in your family. That is not a sarcastic comment either!

    Not all people's goals or ideals are the same though.

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  7. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimberleygal1 View Post
    mmmm I'm curious to know how a child would benefit with having a stay at home parent if the kids are at school? What would the point be? I for one would be bored being at home on my own with the kids at school, I would rather be out working but that's just me. I don't need to work financially, I choose to because I love my work.

    Dh works away, I work 4 days full days a week with 1 child in school currently. The second is in daycare the 4 days a week and the 5th day is our day together which I love. I don't find it hard to juggle, you just have to find that routine. Nor do I have family anywhere near close by to call on. I just manage.

    My day goes a bit like this;
    5am- get out of bed (ds2 is an early riser but ds2 may sleep in til 5.30)
    I have a shower and get ready
    5.40 - Breakfast for all including feeding the 3 furry family members
    6.00 - Kids dressed, teeth and hair brushed, pack ds1's lunch in his bag
    6.15 - watch a bit of tv, quick tidy up of dishes etc from the morning.
    6.50 - Out of the door
    7.00 - drop ds1 to wait for the bus to school
    7.10 - drop ds2 off at daycare and spend time reading etc with him
    7.30 - I am at work and ready to start
    I work through lunch. Finish at 3-3.30 depending on if I have had a break through the day.
    DS1 finishes at 2.20pm and goes home with a friend 2 days a week and has after school care 2 days a week. If he had to come back to work with me for an hour he would be able to and has done.
    I pick ds up by 3.30 and ds2 up by 4pm. I have time to zip to the shops if need be. I also have a few hours of daylight left to enjoy time with the kids before dinner at 6pm, bath,and bed by 7pm for ds2 and 7.30pm for ds1. I make ds's lunch and pack their bags when they are in bed and have clothes ready for all of us for the next day. Usually on Sunday morning I cook bulk meals and freeze for occassions during the week so I don't have to cook every night. The weeks dh is home it's that little bit easier as he is very productive and hands on.

    I also struggle when people suggest daycare fees are expensive, I don't think they are, not when a majority would be eligible for the ccb and the ccr and those not eligible for the ccb such as myself still get the ccr which is quite a cut leaving the oop manageable. Last year my oop for 2 in daycare was $330 per week which we didn't see as expensive. This year I have 1 less in daycare but school fees, excursions etc instead.
    I think the obvious benefits are the parent can play a much larger role in their child's schooling. They can volunteer in the classroom, work in the canteen, do reading with the class. Then they are also available for after school activities. It also means they can help with homework in the afternoons rather than after work when everyone might be a little fractious.

    $330 a week for two children in daycare is very cheap. Our OOP costs for Childcare when i worked full time was $600 a week for one child. Rent is similarly expensive in our area.

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  9. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimberleygal1 View Post
    Maybe not so much material possessions such as holidays and such. I think it's more that people find it more necessary these days to be in a better financial
    position for their childrens benefit. That's how it is for dh and I anyway. We haven't always earned good money and we have had our times at doing it tough financially. While I don't have to work, I want to, love my job and I like contributing financially for our family. Dh and I know our children will struggle buying a house etc by the time they grow up and want to make it easier for them financially. We certainly don't go on expensive holidays or dine out though. We also live remote where the cost of living is much higher, just an example is that rent is between $850 and $1,900 per week. Thankfully we don't have that to worry about but had we not bought all those years ago we would have. But just an example as to why families may need 2 incomes.
    Like I said, I don't expect that many people would agree with what I said.

    DH and I are still trying to invest in our children's future and security we just see things a bit differently. There are more ways to be secure than just financially.

    And before anyone misinterprets me, I'm not saying that most double income families believe any differently to us.

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  11. #56
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    KG $330 a week is a lot of money on minimum wage. You have one child in care too, times that by 2 or 3 and there goes an entire income.

    My youngest is at school this year and I'm ready to start post grad studies to retrain in a different field. We also desperately want another baby but things haven't gone to plan. It's sad you value the role of SAHM so little. My role is important, I love my life and I wouldn't change a single thing. There is more to a child's happiness than 'stuff'.

    Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you love your life too, it works so keep doing it But please don't question the worth of SAHM's......

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  13. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by waterlily View Post
    That's something that I find really upsetting. Everyone has worth.
    Yes they absolutely do. A lesson some people may have to learn the hard way if they or someone they love becomes suddenly unable to earn an income or loses 'prestige'. It can happen to anyone.

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  15. #58
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    Quote Originally Posted by OurLittleBlessing View Post
    I don't expect anyone to agree with me, but I think we've become a society that is way too obsessed with material posessions and having fun (expensive holidays, dinners out regularly, shows etc). Both of which will almost definitely require a double income.
    I think the cost of housing has been more of a factor. In my parents' time it was expected that you save up for a house. An entire house. Now double income families struggle to save up for a deposit.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kimberleygal1 View Post
    Maybe not so much material possessions such as holidays and such. I think it's more that people find it more necessary these days to be in a better financial
    position for their childrens benefit. That's how it is for dh and I anyway. We haven't always earned good money and we have had our times at doing it tough financially. While I don't have to work, I want to, love my job and I like contributing financially for our family. Dh and I know our children will struggle buying a house etc by the time they grow up and want to make it easier for them financially. We certainly don't go on expensive holidays or dine out though. We also live remote where the cost of living is much higher, just an example is that rent is between $850 and $1,900 per week. Thankfully we don't have that to worry about but had we not bought all those years ago we would have. But just an example as to why families may need 2 incomes.
    I think 102 pairs of shoes and as many outfits is unnecessary and materialistic!

    I don't have to work either, but I do because I like my job.

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    Quote Originally Posted by lambjam View Post
    I think the cost of housing has been more of a factor. In my parents' time it was expected that you save up for a house. An entire house. Now double income families struggle to save up for a deposit.
    I can't remember the exact figures, but in my parents day it was around 3 x the average annual income to purchase a house. I'm pretty sure it's 8 or even higher now. It's just out of the question for many people, especially considering the cost of rent, and I live in a State where food is the second most expensive in the country yet we have pretty low wages in comparison to some of the others.

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