What you are describing is not marriage. It is not a partnership or anything remotely like it. He is a dictator, pure & simple. He won't even put his clothes in the washing basket or hang out clothes (just towels)? Seriously??!! So, all he does around the house is reheat dinner & put the dishes away. This is not how marriage is meant to be. The wife isn't meant to do EVERYTHING! It's a partnership, a joint relationship, a combined parenting experience, etc, etc. It doesn't have to be 50-50, yes if one person works more than the other then the non-working person may be able to do more around the house, but the bottom line is that you both should be responsible for the house & the family in general. As for demanding s3x, well if you don't want it, then as the others have said it is rape, regardless of the fact that you are married.
I work 2 days a week & run my own business but mostly I'm at home with our kids (dd 17 months and ds, 6 years, who is at school). My dh works up to 80 hours a week (mostly from home though), but he will still do the laundry (put on a load, put clothes in the dryer or hang them up, sort through dry clothes & put them away), he does the bins, he vacuums (my ds hates the vacuum, so dh often vacuums when I'm out of the house with the kids), he cooks (maybe 2 nights at the moment cause he's working REALLY long hours, but in previous times when we were both working horrid hours he would cook every night) & he does the dishes most of the time (I'm dreadful at cleaning up the kitchen!!). He will also happily do the grocery shopping although currently I end up doing it most of the time. For the kids he does heaps which means putting one of the them to bed at night (we take one child each), bathing them, helping me make lunches in the morning/get ds ready for school/get dd ready to go out, he gets up to dd overnight (not all the time, but quite frequently) and he plays with them when he can.
There is no list of 'jobs' that a 'wife' or 'husband' *should* do, it is something that should be worked out in each marriage. It's going to be different depending on your personal preference, personality traits, etc, etc. It's also going to depend on how much you work. BUT, each partner should do a fair amount each. Your dh is not remotely pulling his weight and it doesn't sound like he ever has.