Havn't read other replies yet but I wouldn't really define you as a SAHM... In my books you're a working mum.. Are dads that work nightshift SAHD's? Nope theyre working Dads, and honestly I think thats usually given as their reason to be even less up for houseduties etc.. Working nights is supposed to be extremely tiring!
OP - Your husband sounds like he needs a swift kick in the bum. And he CANNOT demand sex!
But I do think that working opposite shifts can have a detrimental effect on a marriage. For a while DH who is a shift worker and I were working on opp days to avoid daycare. We only got further apart emotionally and I used to get cranky with him as I did way more on my days at home with the girls than he ever did.
So we put the girls in daycare 2 days a week and its been better for us. We also made a list of what we expect the other to do on the days they are home. I discoverd that DH wanted me to do way less than I was doing and I wanted him to do more. So we compromised. We have a MUST do list, and WISHFUL thinking list.
kids fed, looked after and put to sleep at appropriate times
1 outdoor activity for kids
1 load of laundry done per day, hung out and brought in.
another indoor activity for kids
cleaning of a room
That way we knew what the other expected and it saved arguments. I do agree with PP that you do need counselling.
Please don't just give in just because he expects or needs it.
A wedding ring doesn't EVER give him the right to demand s3x.
Forcing you to have s3x when you don't want to is rape even when your married.
Your needs matter. You need him to be a real man and step up and be a partner not a dictator.
I agree Rose's idea is a good one.
OP: sounds like your hubby may be sabotaging the relationship on purpose with his flip floppy complaints. Could the real issue be that he is unhappy about something else/doesn't want to be in a relationship?
hmm just read the rest.
Get out. Now. He sounds like a self rightous hypocritical abusive clown.
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