+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 4 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 32
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Darwin
    Posts
    299
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked
    69
    Reviews
    0

    Default Would you be ok with your preschooler being told?

    I have had 2 stillbirths, and my preschooler DD was very much involved in the pregnancy, and then involved in grieving as a family for her little sister. When she is asked about her family she states she has a big brother and little sister, but they died and went to heaven. We have told her if she wants to talk about them it's ok, and if she doesn't its ok too.
    So my concern is, I don't want her to upset other people with what is seen as a 'religious statement' of they went to heaven. How would you feel if your 4yr old came home and said their friend has a brother and sister in heaven?

  2. #2
    GrabbyCrabby's Avatar
    GrabbyCrabby is offline She is everything I need, that I never knew I wanted... She is everything I want, that I never knew I needed...
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Posts
    1,167
    Thanks
    3,303
    Thanked
    205
    Reviews
    3
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I don't see it as an issue. I think it's lovely that your DD has a relationship with her angel brother & sister, that's special IMO . x

  3. The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to GrabbyCrabby For This Useful Post:

    Hopefully Waiting  (16-03-2013),HugsBunny  (14-03-2013),αληθη  (14-03-2013),LoveLivesHere  (14-03-2013),mousky  (15-03-2013),OJandMe  (16-03-2013),Pilbara  (14-03-2013),SugarSkull  (18-03-2013)

  4. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    3,037
    Thanks
    1,498
    Thanked
    730
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    No issue .. I am not religious .

  5. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Maybelline For This Useful Post:

    αληθη  (14-03-2013),SugarSkull  (18-03-2013)

  6. #4
    bunkx's Avatar
    bunkx is offline Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    The Hills WA
    Posts
    6,575
    Thanks
    565
    Thanked
    1,252
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I'm not religious & don't believe in heaven, but it wouldn't bother me if my dd2 came home and told me that, I mean I would feel heartbroken for her little friend

  7. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to bunkx For This Useful Post:

    Fang  (20-05-2013),SugarSkull  (18-03-2013)

  8. #5
    LifeInShadesOfGrey's Avatar
    LifeInShadesOfGrey is offline Just a little bit silly :)
    Winner 2012 - Best Username
    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    5,674
    Thanks
    2,052
    Thanked
    1,364
    Reviews
    35
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I would think how sad for that family to have gone through such a terrible time of losing two loved ones.

    I wouldn't think anything negative and I certainly don't see anything wrong with someone saying that "they went to Heaven"

    If anyone had an issue with the reference to Heaven (and Im not religious) i would be disappointed because you shouldn't have to change something like that just to please someone.

    But I agree with below *points down*.

    Sent from my Unicorn.
    Last edited by LifeInShadesOfGrey; 14-03-2013 at 09:28.

  9. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to LifeInShadesOfGrey For This Useful Post:

    αληθη  (14-03-2013),LoveLivesHere  (14-03-2013),Mod-Degrassi  (14-03-2013),SugarSkull  (18-03-2013)

  10. #6
    lambjam's Avatar
    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Canberra
    Posts
    7,177
    Thanks
    2,062
    Thanked
    4,956
    Reviews
    1
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I don't believe in heaven, but I have no issue with other people believing in it. As such, I expect my children to encounter people who believe their loved ones have gone to heaven. Then I tell my children that they can believe in heaven if they want to but they don't have to.

    I suppose the only thing you may want to consider is that other children might tell your DD she is wrong if what she's saying goes against their beliefs. Children not appreciating tact and all that! If that worries you, you could warn her that not everyone will agree with her, and that that's ok.

    Best wishes

  11. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    9,870
    Thanks
    3,034
    Thanked
    5,843
    Reviews
    2
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    I'm not religious, but I think it's a nice (and non-confronting) way for a child to say they have siblings that have passed.

    I'm sorry for your losses

  12. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Mod-Degrassi For This Useful Post:

    αληθη  (14-03-2013),LoveLivesHere  (14-03-2013),SugarSkull  (18-03-2013)

  13. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    gold coast
    Posts
    842
    Thanks
    100
    Thanked
    103
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Sorry duplicate
    Last edited by tamute; 14-03-2013 at 09:48.

  14. #9
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    gold coast
    Posts
    842
    Thanks
    100
    Thanked
    103
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    I think it is beautiful that she knows about her angel brother and sister and its great that you are able to talk about this with her. My sister lost her little boy at 22 weeks and we talk about him with our ds who was 3 at the time and knows that his little cousin is in heaven with his pa.
    I would not be offended if ds1 came home and said this I would just explain what it means. You as a family should be able to talk about your angel babies they are a part of your family and people need to be able to accknowledge this as so often people find it hard to talk about these babies that have left us too soon. If its one thing that I have learnt since my sisters loss is that it can help to talk about the angel babies as this helps with the grieving and lets the parents/other siblings know that even though they are not with us we havent forgotten about them.
    Sorry a bit long

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to tamute For This Useful Post:

    SugarSkull  (18-03-2013)

  16. #10
    αληθη's Avatar
    αληθη is offline BH name read as Aleethee
    Winner 2012 - One most likely to be hacked by Nomsie
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Posts
    2,961
    Thanks
    3,031
    Thanked
    805
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Degrassi View Post
    I'm not religious, but I think it's a nice (and non-confronting) way for a child to say they have siblings that have passed.

    I'm sorry for your losses
    I agree with this, and Lambjam.
    If you have to change the way you innocently phrase something to not offend someone then you're probably not going to be able to say much at all about anything..


    Sent from my talky stick

  17. The Following User Says Thank You to αληθη For This Useful Post:

    SugarSkull  (18-03-2013)


 

Similar Threads

  1. Quick breakfast ideas for preschooler
    By smudgy in forum Lunchbox Ideas
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 17-07-2012, 13:30
  2. Pants for tall slim preschooler
    By my 2 angels in forum General Parenting Tips, Advice & Chat
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 19-06-2012, 19:58
  3. Seeking preschooler activities around Ultimo
    By SoReal in forum Inner West
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 01-05-2012, 15:54

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Einsteinz Music
Make music at Einsteinz Music in age-appropriate class in Sydney's Inner West, Eastern Suburbs or North Shore. For ages 6 mths - 4 yrs. All music is live! Christmas Gift certificates available for full term or casual classes. Call 0431 338 143
sales & new stuffsee all
The Health Hub
Give a new mum a fitness boost for Christmas & New Year. Studio-based, small group training sessions - cardio, strength, core, Pilates & boxing. Choice of 16 hrs per week, flexible-arrival feature - bubs & kids welcome! Gift vouchers available.
featured supporter
GymbaROO
GymbaROO offers activities for babies & toddlers in a fun learning centre, focussing on developmental education. Classes are available Australia-wide. Enrol today & help your child to reach their full potential. Visit the website to find out more.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!