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  1. #21
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    I know you may not want to hear this but a huge percentage of DV begins with the first incident when the woman is pregnant, and just gets worse from there. Leaving may not be easy and you may feel guilty, but you need to think of you and your baby.

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    dancingchipmunk  (09-03-2013),Gandalf  (10-03-2013),HugsBunny  (10-03-2013),Kiplusthree  (09-03-2013),Rutabaga  (09-03-2013),shelle65  (10-03-2013),waterlily  (09-03-2013)

  3. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrsSS View Post
    I'm sorry he is being an idiot!!

    You don't deserve to put up with his immature behaviour. What was his initial reaction when you found out you were pregnant?

    I agree with the other lovely ladies, you need to go stay somewhere for a few days. If he says that if you leave don't come back or whatever then he isn't the one for you. It's all threats and abuse which has no place in a loving relationship.
    He was really excited. We had discussed everything from breast feeding to pre schools and made sure we had the same views on most things. I made sure I thought it was right before I stopped taking the pill. We have been together for years and never had problems like this. I really don't get it.

  4. #23
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    I agree with most other PP's. Leave. This is a dysfunctional situation.

    You should surround yourself with family and friends who have your best interests at heart.

  5. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Youngmummy2bee View Post
    He was really excited. We had discussed everything from breast feeding to pre schools and made sure we had the same views on most things. I made sure I thought it was right before I stopped taking the pill. We have been together for years and never had problems like this. I really don't get it.
    Any chance that with his brother now hanging around that they could be into drugs?? That could explain the change in behavior?

  6. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by jacobsmamma View Post
    Any chance that with his brother now hanging around that they could be into drugs?? That could explain the change in behavior?
    I really don't think so. His brother is just a drop kick but I doubt he's into drugs. And the change came before that with him not coming near me ect.

  7. #26
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    Is he still out with his brother? Are you looking after the kids?

    Just remember you are not his door mat and don't spend your time sitting waiting for him to come home.

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  9. #27
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    Just to give some perspective, sometimes it can take years before true colours come out.. You are very young, what do you mean by years, how many years?

    A family member of mine was young when she met and fell in love with a true gentleman. He was sweet caring polite and romantic. They shared the same interests and hopes for the future.

    The got married after 2 years. Not long after he started swearing at her, but they were already committed so she stayed, it wasnt a big deal she said.

    Then he started pushing/shoving.

    After they had had two children it had gotten to the point where he had hospitalised her twice but she still stayed. They were a family.

    It kept going and he nearly killed her. They seperated finally and he only saw the kids on weekends.

    Years later we find out he had been abusing the son and abusing plus sexually abusing the daughter.

    Im not saying he will do all of this. Im just saying the warning signs are there and they are loud. Calling you a C*nt. Allowing the brother to joke about pushing you dwn the stairs, killing your unborn baby... And all the rest.

    Sorry. I know its not what you want to hear. But no one ever falls in love with an abusive dangerous man. They never start out that way, and often takes some time to really show. But if there are enough warning signs its better to see them clearly now and get out before it gets worse.

    Xox

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  11. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kiplusthree View Post
    Just to give some perspective, sometimes it can take years before true colours come out.. You are very young, what do you mean by years, how many years?

    A family member of mine was young when she met and fell in love with a true gentleman. He was sweet caring polite and romantic. They shared the same interests and hopes for the future.

    The got married after 2 years. Not long after he started swearing at her, but they were already committed so she stayed, it wasnt a big deal she said.

    Then he started pushing/shoving.

    After they had had two children it had gotten to the point where he had hospitalised her twice but she still stayed. They were a family.

    It kept going and he nearly killed her. They seperated finally and he only saw the kids on weekends.

    Years later we find out he had been abusing the son and abusing plus sexually abusing the daughter.

    Im not saying he will do all of this. Im just saying the warning signs are there and they are loud. Calling you a C*nt. Allowing the brother to joke about pushing you dwn the stairs, killing your unborn baby... And all the rest.

    Sorry. I know its not what you want to hear. But no one ever falls in love with an abusive dangerous man. They never start out that way, and often takes some time to really show. But if there are enough warning signs its better to see them clearly now and get out before it gets worse.

    Xox
    Wow that's really scary!! We've been together 3 years next month.

  12. #29
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    May I ask how old your dh is?

  13. #30
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    And no he's been home for a bit. Pretty drunk tho. I'm just leaving them to it and watching tv.


 

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