Im 41, hes 37. I had fertility issues, IVF x 2 didnt work (me trying with donor product alone early last yr), fibriods, low ovarian reserve, scar tissue from abortion at 21.
We had only been together a few months (but very close freinds for over 2 yrs) when I found out I was pg - hadnt used protection as the prognosis for pregnancy naturally was low (as informed by my IVF specialist). He wanted desperatley for me to abort and still wishes i had i think. I couldnt bring myself to abort given my fertility history and age and previous abortion.
So he never wanted the baby to begin with, but on and off has tried to become involved. He has been up and down like a yoyo, staying, leaving, coming back....so maybe i should be less shocked that he has finally left for good 4 days before my scheduled c section (Monday).
I guess I just thought he was essentially a good man with a good heart and would protect me. But if thats the case why has he left me alone? He hasnt even told his parents of the pregnancy. He has never even introduced me to his parents!!! He told me a couple days ago that he wants out and wont "cope" with a new baby, and doesnt want the responsiblity "at this time in his life" and "isnt ready". Also told me under no circumstances does he want to be named as the babys father on the birth certificate. Tells me it has nothing to do with me that he loves me deeply but just isnt ready for kids.
Am I going insane or is this really abnormal behavior for a 37 year old man?? Or are all men no matter what age scared to commit and do hurtfull dumb stuff like this?
I feel very alone even tho I have great friends and have support for Monday now lined up..... But..... Im really really sad - for me.. but also for him and our unborn child. Need hugs.