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  1. #61
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    we had a wishing well, and 17 people unaccounted for when matching up cards/money.. 17 people to match up to the only annonomous amount of $65..

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    But that was your choice to invite them and spend that much! I don't know about you but I don't invite people to my wedding to receive a gift from them, I invite them to share and celebrate our special day. Money in an envelope means nothing to me. That's just me though, I want to spend time with people for who they are not how much money they give me.

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  4. #63
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jarylee View Post
    But that was your choice to invite them and spend that much! I don't know about you but I don't invite people to my wedding to receive a gift from them, I invite them to share and celebrate our special day. Money in an envelope means nothing to me. That's just me though, I want to spend time with people for who they are not how much money they give me.
    This

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  6. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by queenvee View Post
    As for the whole single mum scrapes her money together to travel to a wedding......I don't know how many people would leave themselves with nothing just to attend a wedding. She would probably borrow money or get a government loan or something. Or not go.....
    A government loan? Really? Lol yeah ok cos the government are in the habit if just handing out money

    I recently went interstate for a big family birthday celebration with my two kids. After paying for flights as well as all my other household bills for the fortnight, I was left with $50. $50 to spend over a four day weekend on myself and two kids. The birthday party was held at a restaurant. I had to eat the salad bar so that I was able to buy a meal for my kids. I could have borrowed money from someone but I could never have afforded to pay them back so I just wouldn't ask in the first place.

    Honestly, some people really just don't have a clue. Government loans? Please!

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    Quote Originally Posted by missie_mack View Post
    Personally I think how much a person gives you based on their income is a reflection of who they are. To come to a wedding, eat, drink and enjoy the festivities and only give $10 or worse nothing seems to say that they don't think particularly highly of the couple.
    But then you're damned if you do, damned if you don't. If you don't come, the bride and groom think you don't think enough of them to share their day after they have honoured you with an invitation.

    If you do go but don't give 'enough' then they don't think you think much of them.

    If everyone thought that way, I'd be so scared of getting an invitation to a wedding!

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    I find it so sad that people think that the dollar value of a gift relates the depth of regard a person has for the couple getting married. As I said I will always give the very best/most generous gift I can afford however in our current position it would not be over $75 dollars but sadly I feel that in the view of many in this thread I would be regarded as a being in it *for a free feed*.

    I really hope that none of my wedding guests felt they had to prove their worth.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HugsBunny View Post

    Government loans? Please!
    I know!

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    This thread is making me never want to go to a wedding!!

    I thought the idea of a wedding was because you loved each other and wanted to share that with friends and family.. But it sounds like its a money grab and you'll only be happy if guest give you hundreds to attend your wedding.

    It you can't afford to feed your guest don't invite as manny!!

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  15. #69
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    Quote Originally Posted by missie_mack View Post
    I am sure if you truly cannot afford it a friend or family member would understand. But really if someone can afford to splash the cash willy nilly on themselves constantly and not even give a card or a gift- it seriously has to make one wonder what their opinion or what esteem they hold you in.
    Each to their own I guess.

    Personally though, I don't take much notice of what others spend their money on - I'm too preoccupied with living my own life to scrutinise the spending habits of those around me.

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    I can't believe how many people equate money to etiquette. I went to a wedding interstate, cost me a fortune I didn't have, and we gave $50 for our family of four. It upsets me to think some people consider that rude. You may think a family are well off, but how do you know? Some people hide financial distress quite well. That $50 was difficult for us to spare. I love the people involved, I wanted to be at the wedding. Should I offend them by refusing to attend or attend and 'only' give $50 which is still a stretch?

    When did we become so money obsessed? That more money given = better guest.

    Best wedding I went to was a friend's wedding where the reception was in their backyard. Low key, celebratory, genuinely about sharing their happiness with friends and they made a point about appreciating all gifts big or small.

    Part of being a good host is being gracious.

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