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  1. #231
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    This thread is starting to reallllly drag on :-/

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  3. #232
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    Quote Originally Posted by Buttermilk View Post
    But no one said you invite people just for the gifts? You do know you will get them though unless you say otherwise. Like I said, if you have a wedding just for presents, you are better off saving the costs of the wedding and buying your own presents.
    If you read my other post, you would see that I was replying to Ladidah about babyshowers vs. weddings. I never said that's why people are invited to weddings, but that some people expect gifts/money from them when in reality it shouldn't matter if a guest even gives you a gift or how much money.

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    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    If you read my other post, you would see that I was replying to Ladidah about babyshowers vs. weddings. I never said that's why people are invited to weddings, but that some people expect gifts/money from them when in reality it shouldn't matter if a guest even gives you a gift or how much money.
    And I disagree for reasons given in the last 25 pages

  5. #234
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    Quote Originally Posted by Buttermilk View Post
    And I disagree for reasons given in the last 25 pages
    And that's why everyone has an issue.

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    Lol one thing that I found rather rude was a group of about 30 people were at a public park obviously celebrating a wedding on the cheap, there were next to no food and a few bottles of wine and limited decorations and clearly no entertainment. It looked like a light supper and a few drinks.
    What I found interesting was there was a huge wishing well plonked as the main attraction, it looked so big I commented to my fiancé it appears to have cost more than the wedding itself!
    I was dumbfounded as to how this couple who were not even in correct wedding outfits, had the cheek to expect cash donations to a wedding costing less than $500!?!

  7. #236
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    I think people are moving away from traditional weddings because of some of the vibes coming up in this thread.

    The last 3 I went to were less formal, garden or beach weddings with less structure and " traditions". Lots of gorgeous food and wine, beautiful decorations and music and every single guest had a wonderful time. All were "no gifts" (though some did bring gifts) and a wishing well plonked in the middle of the room asking for cash would just not have flowed with the theme of celebrating with friends and family, the union of a couple.

    A lot of people resent being asked for money to attend a wedding. The whole idea that its to help you recoup some of the wedding guest is ridiculous to me, they are guests, that you've invited to witness your wedding.

    I hear lots of people boast and say (not directed to anyone on here) "oh we bagged 15k or 20k in gift money for our wedding" to me it's just another reason why people don't like being forced into giving money.
    Last edited by Clementine Grace; 03-03-2013 at 12:05.

  8. #237
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    I guess it seems that for some couples the aim is to recoup their reception expenditure through gifts or cash received. To me, that seems quite mercenary and it is not in the spirit that DH and I approached our wedding and the way we viewed ourselves or our guests - as co-participants in a retail transaction.

    Each to their own, but from the examples given by some in this thread that sort of mind-set obviously has the potential to cause some post wedding resentment once the reconciliation is completed. I'm glad we avoided that.

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    I just want to know if those people who consider it 'rude' to only be given $20 by a guest have specified on the invite 'please ensure you give a large enough gift to cover the cost of your meal'.

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  12. #239
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    Quote Originally Posted by LaDiDah View Post
    I just want to know if those people who consider it 'rude' to only be given $20 by a guest have specified on the invite 'please ensure you give a large enough gift to cover the cost of your meal'.
    Would love to see that!

  13. #240
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    Why would anyone do that? It's pretty common knowledge to give more than that at a wedding. I mean who does that? I don't give anyone a $20note for anything let alone a wedding.
    The only issue I see in this thread is people don't want to part with their cash and resent anyone who dares a wishing well. And you show resentment by blaming them, how dare they expect anything from you?
    Geesh.

    Even suggesting because you didn't means you got married for the "right reasons" ??
    Talk about being gracious, that extends to giving aswell.


 

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