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  1. #101
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    Quote Originally Posted by HugsBunny View Post
    That's lovely for you but I think it's important to remember that not everyone is like you and your culture.
    I would resepct the persons culture though? I went to a friends wedding, it was Vietnamese, they had around 1000 guests. Tradition was to give them money in an envelope. I think it would have been highly rude of me not to respect it and give them the gift that is traditional for them?

    Jenaismum:
    I would love it if someone wrote on their invite 'we are saving for our first home and have a wishing well set up instead of gifts' I would be honoured to help contribute to that, I love my family/friends, why wouldn't I want to?
    Gifts are expected at weddings, its not rude to say what you want, I prefer it because you'll get them anyway, because most people will feel uncomfortable going with nothing. You shouldn't feel rude in asking or telling people what to get. It's a wedding!

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    Quote Originally Posted by CookingMonster View Post
    I have been invited to an interstate wedding and am very excited to go. It is going to cost me almost $300 in flights and $260 in accomodation in addition to hire car. The wedding has a wishing well style gift request.
    How much do you think would be appropriate to give? It is just me - DH and dd are staying home.
    Plain and simple: You give what YOU can comfortably afford.

  3. #103
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    Quote Originally Posted by Buttermilk View Post
    I would resepct the persons culture though? I went to a friends wedding, it was Vietnamese, they had around 1000 guests. Tradition was to give them money in an envelope. I think it would have been highly rude of me not to respect it and give them the gift that is traditional for them?
    Absolutely respect that persons culture but you have told people they are rude and shouldn't attend a wedding if they can't give a 'decent' amount of money or spend that money on a gift. You're assuming the couple in question are of your culture when in fact it's most likely you have no idea about the couple at all.

    I'm just saying that because its what happens in your culture doesn't mean it happens that way for everyone else, and to say everyone else is rude for not doing what you do is rather rude in itself.

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    Stiflers Mom  (01-03-2013)

  5. #104
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    You matched up cards with money? Wow Does it really matter? You invited, I'm assuming, people you cared about. It was not their job to fund your wedding. Maybe those people just couldn't afford it? Weddings these days have become a huge cost to guests. Outfits, travel, accommodation. Then if you are on the bridal party add easily a grand to that.

    I'm just floored at some of the comments in this thread
    uh yeah! simple. eg: i opened the card and saw who the money was from. was i meant to shut my eyes and not see who gave what?


    btw there was none of those 17 guest who had to travel to the wedding. it was in Brisbane City.. Some lived at New Farm.. 5 mins away. Some of these people as well, and others decided to take up double and triple shots at the bar tab. Not really fair on others. we had a staff member come and tell us 20 mins into the reception that the same people are doing double and triple shots and the bar tab is down $500. in 20 mins??. Rude. they should be able to drink with control, not see it as a freebie grab and get tanked and start yelling swear words around the reception like they did and think it was hilarious.

    I didn't invite anybody to ''fund'' my wedding. we paid for it ourselves and invited whoever we wanted to. but as i said it isn't that difficult to buy a $3 card. it's just manners.

    Don't worry, it's not the fact that i didn't get money from 17 odd people, but at least a $3 card would have been nice.
    Last edited by GlitterFarts; 01-03-2013 at 12:13.

  6. #105
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    Quote Originally Posted by HugsBunny View Post
    Absolutely respect that persons culture but you have told people they are rude and shouldn't attend a wedding if they can't give a 'decent' amount of money or spend that money on a gift. You're assuming the couple in question are of your culture when in fact it's most likely you have no idea about the couple at all.

    I'm just saying that because its what happens in your culture doesn't mean it happens that way for everyone else, and to say everyone else is rude for not doing what you do is rather rude in itself.
    It's not Australian culture to give nothing. What culture are you talking about?
    I would also know the couple very well if I was attending their wedding!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennaisme View Post
    Erm.. Sarcasm doesn't translate well in text.
    So.. Are you being sarcastic?? oO
    Not in the slightest.

    Thomas J Kelly sums up my feelings on this issue very well:
    http://www.ihateweddings.com/index.php?itemid=37

  8. #107
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    Quote Originally Posted by Buttermilk View Post
    It's not Australian culture to give nothing. What culture are you talking about?
    I would also know the couple very well if I was attending their wedding!
    No I'm not saying give nothing, but you've stated that its rude not to give a 'decent amount of money' which roughly translates to 'more than $50'.

    You'd know the couple well? I'm attending a wedding in 3 weeks for a couple I've never met before :-) I was also invited to 2 weddings last year for people I had met once and the other couple I'd never met either. Not everything is black and white. That's all I'm trying to say.

  9. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    Not in the slightest.

    Thomas J Kelly sums up my feelings on this issue very well:
    http://www.ihateweddings.com/index.php?itemid=37
    And err.. Where does the "You can pay me to be at your wedding" come into it thing?

  10. #109
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jennaisme View Post
    And err.. Where does the "You can pay me to be at your wedding" come into it thing?
    Never said that I said that if anyone deserves gifts it is the guests, not the couple.

  11. #110
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    Quote Originally Posted by shelle65 View Post
    Never said that I said that if anyone deserves gifts it is the guests, not the couple.
    Ah, apologies, I misunderstood. Guests get a gift regardless, so I'm not understanding this?


 

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