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  1. #1
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    Default Struggling :(

    DH has always travelled for work; we've been married for nearly 13 years and it's something I've gotten used to. At times I've even enjoyed the bit of space, time to indulge in Gossip Girl and ice cream

    However... He's been commuting since September, a commute we thought would see him away 3-4 nights a week but which has turned out to usually be 6 nights. We decided at Christmas that this wasn't viable, so we would move the family. We decided to take our time, not rush the sale of our house, plan things properly. And I was happy with this because I love our current set up, our house, school, friends.

    But having made the decision to go I'm finding myself really struggling with him away. Every time he leaves for the airport I just want to sweep everyone up and go with him. I'm often teary and just feeling tired and spent. It's strange for me, because I've always coped so well with him away, it's as though I've lost the reason for doing it and the ability is following suit.

    Anyway... Sorry for the essay. Just wanted to introduce myself to this part of the forum and perhaps find some mojo in your stories

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    That sucks that you're just starting to struggle with it now. My theory is before you decided on the move it was just something you had to cope with and no big deal, but now you know there's a light at the end of the tunnel it has created a type of anticipation and you just want it to be over!

    Hopefully things will start to pick up soon for you.

    My dh works away from home, but travels all over, so really no matter where we move he's still going to be traveling.

  3. #3
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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    I think you're right. That light at the end of the tunnel is a curse!

    How much time is your DH away?

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    I honestly don't know how you do it, I wouldn't cope if DH had to go away for work, we've only spent a total of 7 nights apart in the 8 years since we've lived together. so I think your amazing coping with it for so long.

    I don't have any suggestions for you or anything just wanted to say that that must be really rough for you and I hope time passes quickly so you can move.

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    Quote Originally Posted by lambjam View Post
    How much time is your DH away?
    He usually tries to make it home for weekends, but it depends on the job. He was away for somewhere between 6-8 weeks before Christmas and I think the longest he's ever been away was something like 3 months. Since Christmas the longest has been two weeks, which is good and he's in the process of lining up a job that will keep him local for a month or maybe twoand we're hoping that coincides around the time that bub #1 is due.

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    lambjam is offline Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!
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    Thanks peanutmonkey

    Wow, that's a harsh schedule Disbride! I hope you can arrange things so he's around more when bub arrives.

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    Hugs chick, it really can suck hey.

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    With DHs career field. He simply can not stay where we are if he wants to progress. We tossed up him working away and coming home when he can. The money would have been amazing and he would be leaving his dream and getting a lot of recognition in his field.

    He told me one night that he could never do it. The thought of being away from us both so much would be too hard, I think I would have coped.

    I always thought of the poor partners at home with the kids and no help, I never once thought about the husbands away from their families and homes. It takes a very strong couple to take on such a task. You have bother endured so much and still carried on and coped for so long. What a great relationship you must have!

    Like you said, light at the end of the tunnel.

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    *Hugs*

    I'm a bit like you too, sometimes I cope, other times I really struggle. It's so hard. I'm feeling good tonight though because DH is back this weekend for just a few days, at least it's something

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    Big hugs. Like the PPs have said it might be getting to you more now that you have a light at the end of the tunnel.

    It is hard when hubby's work away. Mine has done FIFO work for the past 4 years. Was not so bad when it was just me, but has been harder since DS was born a year ago. I'm really struggling with it at the moment being 29 weeks pregnant and running after a toddler. I'm also sick at the moment with a chest infection which doesn't help things! And of course hubby only left a few days ago and won't be back for a month!! Always the way!

    Takes a strong couple to deal with one partner working away. It's hard on me sometimes but also so hard on DH being away from us and home.

    Keep going as best you can. Hopefully the move won't be too far away and you can put this part of your life behind you!!!


 

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