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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by cassieh View Post
    I am finding this group is helping me a lot, as I can be very judgmental. I have a friend who has just given birth.. Her baby is less than a week old and she has given up on the breast already... She didn't go to any breast feeding classes or ask questions at the hospital. So I can't help but think it is a lack of knowledge that has made her give up. It's really hard not to try and tell her to stick at it, that its not meant to be easy...
    I would advise you not to tell her to 'stick at it and that it's not meant to be easy'. Considering you haven't even been there you really have no idea at all.

    It's great you're trying to find out as much as you can beforehand.

    And great that you acknowledge you can be very judgemental because it shows tbh.

    Try to steer clear of comments like those highlighted above when you are asking for womens personal experiences with breastfeeding. It's offensive.

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    Default Breast feeding vs Formula Feeding??

    Some people just don't want to.

    I formula fed my kids from birth because that's what I wanted... and there's nothing wrong with that.

    Stop worrying about your friends situation, her baby is being fed.

    If you really want to BF, arm yourself with knowledge and a good support system.

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    Default Breast feeding vs Formula Feeding??

    I am not going to say anything to her .... And yes I don't know how it is... Which is why I'm asking other people's experiences and why they struggled so I can have a more open mind & also am aware of the potential problems I'm going to have to work through. I'm sad to admit that I am judgemental, which is why I have joined this forum so I stop being so judgemental and hear other people's stories.. And understand what they were going through, how they felt, etc. I'm not meaning to be offensive....
    Last edited by cassieh; 22-02-2013 at 08:29.

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  7. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by cassieh View Post
    I am finding this group is helping me a lot, as I can be very judgmental. I have a friend who has just given birth.. Her baby is less than a week old and she has given up on the breast already... She didn't go to any breast feeding classes or ask questions at the hospital. So I can't help but think it is a lack of knowledge that has made her give up. It's really hard not to try and tell her to stick at it, that its not meant to be easy...
    Just be a little more sensitive. Breastfeeding can be insanely difficult for many women. Combine that with a zillion hormones flying around the new mother and it's a volitile mix! I know with DS when I was trying to establish bf'ing with him if anyone asked me about bf'ing in the first few weeks I would have burst into tears. I didn't go to classes or even know what a lactation consultant was. I assumed that since it was natural it would be easy and if I had any questions I could ask a midwife - I had no idea how much conflicting information there is and how painful it can be. Women focus on the pain of birth, pffft, walk in the park compared to bf'ing for me!!

    Quote Originally Posted by cassieh View Post
    My sister in law breast feed and she will be a great support as she has told me of all the nights she sat there crying, wanting to give up. So I think it will really help to have someone pushing me to go through.
    Surround yourself with support - great strategy!!

    Quote Originally Posted by cassieh View Post
    For those of you who did switch to formula.. Did you consider mix feeding? Or was it formula exclusive.. And did the mid wives express their concern for not sticking with breast? I am going to RWBH and they are very very pro-breast feeding.
    I was never able to establish bf with DS but I could not accept him not having any breastmilk so I expressed what I could for about 4 months. It was terribly time consuming but I'm glad I did it. Expressing can offer a middle ground between ff and bf.

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    Default Breast feeding vs Formula Feeding??

    Sorry if I offended anyone with my previous comments.

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    Default Breast feeding vs Formula Feeding??

    It does help if you can accept that breastfeeding is difficult and something you both need to learn. If you are willing to invest the time , effort and pain for the first few weeks then it is worth it in the end!

  11. #27
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    Default Breast feeding vs Formula Feeding??

    Btw there are heaps of women who have no trouble breastfeeding. But it's not talked about as much.

    Yes there are people who find it hard.

    Yes there are people that don't want to bf and that's fine.

    I've bf both my girls with ease beyond the first few days. for our family breast IS best. There is no substitute.

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    Default Breast feeding vs Formula Feeding??

    Rose.. Did you do anything to prepare yourself for breast feeding? Any creams on your nipples? Anything you did that you found really helped you?? My mother has suggested tanning my nipples as a way of toughening them up. Lol. Has anyone done that?

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    I found bf hard and painful .. Managed 3 months .. Then switched to formula ..
    with my next baby I will try to bf again .. Hopefully wont be as difficult ..but will ff if need to ( would prefer breast as much easier and cheaper in the long run)

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    Default Breast feeding vs Formula Feeding??

    I don't think you offended anyone, I think it is great how honest you are being, and educating yourself. You really cannot understand something until you have been there, so it is nice you are trying to.

    Breastfeeding is such an emotional roller coaster, I think if the body wasn't full of hormones, just birthed a baby, extreme sleep deprivation, then more people would succeed, but it just isn't that easy. So many new Mums say 'I didn't realise it would be this hard' because it is - it is a massive life change having children, especially the lack of sleep, and sometimes FF is a great way to make a lot of things so much easier (like filling baby up to make him content and grow, rather than suffering depression and a malnourished baby because others think you 'should' breastfeed).


 

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