I'm not about to have a sook about anyone else, I just need to vent about what I have done myself that I am now regretting. I don't really need to be told I was wrong because I already think that myself.
Someone once told me that it wasn't a problem unless I thought it was. At the time I didn't think any of it was a problem. But now, now I have regret in the things I have done as a parent. Infact I actually feel like a bit of a failure and well a pretty rotten parent really.
DS is 15 months old and he is co-sleeping with us. Now we nevernplanned on that happening, it just happened and I didn't have a problem with it before because it allowed me to get more sleep or at least feel a bit more rested. It made night feeds easier so I could close my eyes and have a rest while he fed. But now I wish he was in a cot, he is waking in the middle of the night and climbing out of bed and then he's awake for another hour+ while we try and get him back to sleep. All those nights of getting a bit of a rest would probably have been better spent training him to sleep through the night in the cot.
He's also still having bottles at night. We've tried weening him off it but we just suck at this parenting thing and we give in. We offer him water so that he might think its not worth waking up, it works on the odd occasion but we end up getting a bottle just to keep him happy if the water frustrates him coz it's not what he wants. Yes I think he is in control.
He also gets rocked to sleep, I have been thinking about it a lot lately while rocking him and I just feel like such a bad parent for allowing this to go on. I don't think I should be rocking him to sleep still but it breaks my heart to hear him crying that allowing him to cry in the cot is so hard. I just need to suck it up and get it done.
Problem is now that DS hates the cot and won't sleep in it so because we have now had twins which are 4 weeks old we have them using the cot. We figured he's never going to use it so we didn't want to buy another one for a twin when his was going to waste.
I just hope we don't screw up with the twins as well.
I could go on there are many things I feel like I am failing at. Just needed to get the sleeping off my chest. Maybe I'll air my regrets about other things later.