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  1. #21
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    Default Which manners are most important to teach your children?

    Quote Originally Posted by BlissedOut View Post
    We also don't have a ban on cuss words, I've been over that in here before though.

    Same reason, it's not what you say, but how you say it... we don't allow aggressive talk in our home.
    Fair enough, I understand your thoughts. Thank you for replying to my quote. I was really interested to know. What choices work for your family is completely valid, thank you for replying.

    Also do you find whilst out and about that people request the please and thank you from your children before giving them a drink etc (ie at a friends place etc) all young children that enter our home are reminded to use please and thank you and I have seen this at many homes. Do you come across this and how do you and your family manage it? Again curious lol.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 1CrazyMoose View Post
    Also do you find whilst out and about that people request the please and thank you from your children before giving them a drink etc (ie at a friends place etc) all young children that enter our home are reminded to use please and thank you and I have seen this at many homes. Do you come across this and how do you and your family manage it? Again curious lol.
    Ooo Im curious too because I always ask for please/thank you manners from other children who come into my home.

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    Default Which manners are most important to teach your children?

    Quote Originally Posted by London View Post
    Ooo Im curious too because I always ask for please/thank you manners from other children who come into my home.
    Yes same here :-)

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    Quote Originally Posted by 1CrazyMoose View Post
    Fair enough, I understand your thoughts. Thank you for replying to my quote. I was really interested to know. What choices work for your family is completely valid, thank you for replying.

    Also do you find whilst out and about that people request the please and thank you from your children before giving them a drink etc (ie at a friends place etc) all young children that enter our home are reminded to use please and thank you and I have seen this at many homes. Do you come across this and how do you and your family manage it? Again curious lol.
    I've never had a friend try to coach my kids on their version of manners and the kids 'school' teachers share my thoughts on it. So far it's a non-issue.

    We're a bilingual family, our other language doesn't have an equivalent for please and thank you, which has also influenced our thoughts on enforcing the use of it.

    I won't be surprised if my kids just pick it up and use it due to social conditioning, but it's not a big deal for them not to use it with us and others.

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    Default Which manners are most important to teach your children?

    My DD is only 5mths, but it's never too early to start demonstrating/modelling the behaviours u wish them to follow! I agree with all of the above, as well as making eye contact when being greeted/spoken to, and actually act like ur interested when someone is speaking to u. I get so angry when a 15yr old check-out chick says 'hi' in the most depressing, monotone voice, with barely a glance towards u and can't carry the most basic of conversations! Is social media the cause of these (in my eyes) bad manners, or simply no social skills taught by parents?
    NB: I'm not attacking the shy people - there is a difference between shyness and indifference.

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    Not trying to offend you Blissed, but I just found that so strange.

    I guess it doesn't really matter if people use please or thank you or not, but I'd automatically consider someone rude if they didn't use these words to me when asking me to do something for them/when I have already done something for them.

    Despite there being no need for someone to say "thank you," to me when I give them a massage, because, well, they're paying... but if someone didn't say, "thanks!" when they left (they always do), I'd be a bit weirded out I think. I'd wonder if they didn't like me, if I'd done a bad job, etc.

    I also don't give things to people if they don't say, "please." To adults and children alike, I'll wait and if they don't pick up on the fact I'm waiting for manners, I just say, "...please Stacey...?" and wait until they do.

    I've never met anyone who isn't taught "please" and "thank you," as the most basic of manners, so I just find your approach so foreign.

    I hope it works out well for you though.

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    I havent read all the replies, but my DS is not quite two...

    So far we have Ta/Thankyou
    Yes please
    Please
    ...

    I am working on excuse me.

    He grasps the concept of sharing but like any toddler, sometimes forgets. he is an only child though, and has no problems sharing food (LOVES feeding our dogs his dinner) and will often force us/nan to "share" his food.

    I will work on others as he grows. Children with manners are such a pleasure to be around. Working in early childhood pre-SAHM, i found the children with lack of or no manners a challenge, and often found myself encouraging them. E.g.

    Child: "GET me some paper. I want to draw!"
    Me: "Can you please get me some paper to draw?...........................Yes i can do that for you.................................Your Welcome"

    We werent allowed to force them though.. pet peeve! Some of them i would have loved to say "I can only get you some paper when you use your manners!!"

  10. #28
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    Blissed Out, out of sheer curiosity, what would your reaction be if you were at your friends place and your child asked for a drink and the person said "yes what?" or "what do you need to say?" or something along those lines (in the appropriate polite voice, not a harsh one)?

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    Default Which manners are most important to teach your children?

    Reading through this thread reminded me of my 2 year old nieces confusion with manners - she can't quite get her head around "yes please" and "no thank you" so when you say "A, would you like a drink?" The answer is usually "no please" haha - so cute!!

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    Default Which manners are most important to teach your children?

    One "manners thing" I'm quite proud of my DS1 for is saying "Pardon?" instead of "Huh?" or "What?"

    Drummed into him from years of refusing to respond to anything other than pardon.


 

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