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  1. #531
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    Lissy if you are looking for positive afirmations google Louise Hay she has daily affirmations on her website - I also bought her book (How to heal your life) & have a whole heap of affirmations on my wall. I'm also trying to practice gratitude - the last 2 cycles I've done I've felt much more grounded - I was getting a bit lost & dissolutioned last year -but focusing on my mind & also changing my diet (I eat Paleo) has really changed my outlook on things.

    Thanks for the congratulations girls - I'm over the moon xx

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    Oh Betty cause when you have diabetes they automatically don't let you go over your due date, then once your one insulin your classed high risk and when high risk they just wanna get the baby out as soon as they can. He did mention that with diabetes there is a higher risk of still birth for some reason??? I don't know what the stats are but I'm not taking any chances. I know dr Singh has my baby's best interests in mind so I'm happy to follow his direction.

  3. #533
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    Totally fair enough, I would trust him as well. I knew you had the GD but didn't recall you mentioning any other health issues and I didn't know GD made you high risk -- was just curious.

    I have a hernia which is an unknown quantity during pregnancy and labour so I'll probably end up having a Cesarean.

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    I think your high risk once your on insulin for GD. Apart from that I've had no other issues what so ever. I've been really lucky.
    That's sucks about the hernia, are you ok about having the Caesarian? I heard alot of ivf girls elect caesarians just to minimize risk.

  5. #535
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    Yeah, while I like the idea of a water birth, I have never felt a really strong desire to have a natural birth -- grew up hearing how traumatic my birth was (and still have the dent on my skull from forceps to prove it) and so I am ok with a cesarean. (As a bonus Dr Singh thinks he can operate on the hernia at the same time as the cesarean!)

  6. #536
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    thanks Goldie, i didn't want to put you on the spot by saying that but it's good to be truthful i think and i wanted you to know why i hadn't mentioned you in the 1st post! because you hadn't had as many cycles for me to have read about the ups and downs, which is bloody fantastic for you, if only we were all so lucky! oh god please don't think i'd crash your thread and then make you not feel at home here, you are an integral member!! so sorry if it came across that way. absolutely nothing but good feelings here now, but it does take time to work through reading about other people successes when you are struggling so much yourself. that's why i stopped posting on BH for most of last year, i couldn't really deal with it well. and there were lots of ladies who got lucky like you, it was actually other monthly threads which made me want to stop posting and how many times i needed to keep re-joining that was the final straw. i am so happy to cheer you on as you give me hope, like betty said just because you were so fortunate with ivf does not mean you didn't have your fair share of heartache before that. but thanks for being so considerate and saying what you did, you are going to be a beautiful, kind, lovely mummy

    kate - another fellow paleo girl! i'm with you there! i have been eating paleo since feb last year, fell off the wagon a bit when i started cycling again late last year, but really kicked it in again for last couple of months and feel great. (my god being on 25mg of prednislone/steroids would have me the size of a house by now without it, already gained 10kg since this time last year, but i was very small then and i'm over the vanity for now, just want to be healthy for myself and bubs). i actually remember you mentioning a plan you got from your chiropractor (or other healthcare person, if memory serves me?) and i almost wrote to you and asked for it as you had offered it! i'd love a copy if you have the time, especially if it has any recipe suggestions. i've got some beauts if you are interested. i make the best paleo banana bread going i am not 100% stict paleo anymore and have worked out what works for me. i eat pretty much paleo + dairy now, so totally grain free, and the only milk i drink is the A2 milk which was reccomended to me by a doc in the US that i skyped with about my MTHFR issues. i will look into louise hay, i have a book or 2 of hers from years ago, but won't hurt to refresh my memory. i currently have a little stand with cards next to my bed with affirmation quotes that i rotate through like 'when you are eating fruit think of the person that planted the tree' - i love that one
    oh and i'm calling twinnies too!!

    oh shiz Betty, if you've seen some of my posts over there you've probably seen some of my crazy!!! lol...a lot has happened these last few weeks. i always kept an eye on what you were doing with cycles as we shared kee as a dr. and yes i was jealous of you too!!! lol, not in a nasty way of course just wishing it was me!! but like i said to goldie, you all keep me inspired to keep going - that it CAN happen, and that real pregnancies can eventuate out of this ivf madness. i just realise now to keep it real and reach out and take all the support i can get instead of making out i'm ok. actually just had massive spit at hubby, well not really at him, but just had a huge flood of tears and he had to just sit and listen for AGES. it's crazy what sits just under the surface, eventhough i'm feeling pretty good generally compared to how i used to in years past

    so there's my evening spew for you, thanks for listening, sorry again in advance for how i go on and on at the moment - hopefully it will calm down one of these days!!

  7. #537
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    thanks for welcome too TK and newmummy - you'll all be new mummies soon!!

    Jen, yes i do recall you mentioning wazza a long time ago i think? he is friggin awesome, so very happy with what we are doing now, though kee was lovely too. and yes i am seeing both wazza and dr matthias in sydney, thankfully wazza has agreed to work with him (not all fs do). it's a huge protocol, but we need to go out on a limb now...we are facing things like donor eggs/adoption/surrogacy if it doesn't happen soon. the thought terrified me until this cycle they told me that all the embyros had stopped growing on day 4 and not to expect a transfer, that day i truly mourned and was convinced i would never have my own biological children (as it would have been the 3rd cycle in a row we didn't make it to day 5). found out it may have been an icsi issue that was not suiting my eggs (that's another story, i will never use icsi again) but this time wazza said to cut it off at the pass and if they didn't make it to day 5, then we need to know instead of panicing and putting them back early all the time if they are just dying inside of me. lo and behold on transfer morning (saturday) i made the call, which was supposed to confirm the no go, and they tell us we have one early blast, one compacting morula & 2 more morulas!!!! this was after the day before the report had been they were not progressing!!! so they had a nice little sleep on day 4 or something, who knows, but it was an incredible miracle. i feel so blessed to even be in the TWW right now i'm still pinching myself. we put in the 2 best, but the others did not make it to freeze. wazza sang his 'there's a bear in there' song for us at transfer and lots of other fun stuff. but in the previous 24hrs i had to face my worst fears, and i found in my heart such a deep desire to be a mum and to give my husband children that i know i will do whatever it takes. i don't need to stubbornly hang onto making it happen my way, with my genetics. that any child - donor/adopted etc will be our babies. but before now i could have never said that.

    sorry to go on, there has just been so much lately, just Thursday a week ago (4 days before EPU) our beloved kitten Rocky was hit by a car and died. again i have never mourned so hard in all my life. he was like our child and we are still greiving quite badly. we loved him so dearly, he was our little boy. i wrote a lot about it over in the immunology thread so i don't want to go on - plus i need to go to bed and have a shower right now!! lol...but seriously, his passing also broke open my heart enough to realise i could have children a variety of ways. i didn't give birth to him but i loved him like a child! he was only 6 months old, which is so sad that he didn't have more time, but i am so grateful for having had the time we did. he came into our lives when we were hurting so badly and helped us heal. he taught me how to love again and be vulnerable, as this journey can make us so self protective and hardened. it was so beautiful to see my hubby cradle that little kitten like a baby and tell him how beautiful he was, it melted my heart. i could see what an awesome dad he will be. it's like Rocky gave us our training wheels for parenthood and i truly believe that the gift Rocky has given us by being in our life is that we will have children sooner because of him. i KNOW i can accept however we need to have kids. life is too short. we have been given hope in this cycle, and would potentially go 1 or 2 more with wazza with my eggs, but then it would be time to move forward knowing we have given it our all, without the bitterness i had in my heart before that beautiful little soul wrapped up in a kitten came into our life. hopefully i don't sound too crazy right now!! i had never had my own adopted animal before, only ever with parents etc, i have such a newfound respect & love for the animal kingdom. they understand unconditional love more than we do i feel! i am actually in the process of writing a story about his life, called 'rockyknowsbest (that's my instagram) - how one little cat taught me to live again'. It's a mixture of Rocky's life and ivf, just the journey. I've always wanted to write a novel and have started many, but never had a topic i was passionate about enough to complete it. even if no one ever reads it, and it's just for me, hubby, loved ones etc it will be great to read when i'm old and in a rocking chair one day when i can't remember any of it!! it's also helping with the healing process, doing something productive. and i plan to put lots of photos through it, i'm actually making a special picture book with my nana tomorrow that you can get printed at big W of all his best photos. (i'm serious about him being like a child - i have like 1000 photos to choose from, he was absolutely adorable). we used to joke at how smothered the poor little guy was with all our pent up nurturing coming out, but now i like to say all the kisses i gave him were to last him forever as he wasn't going to be in this world long and i'm so glad for every kiss i gave him (on the top of his head of course!lol). my nana is so lovely, like a best friend, and coming to spend my day off work with me tomorrow to keep me company.

    eeek...i wasn't finished after the last post...step away from the computer alisa!!! nighty night everyone

  8. #538
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    Whoa ladies, so sorry for the prolific posts last night. I woke up and realised it might be a good idea for me to start a blog, a diary on BH has never really appealed for some reason, and besides there are other things than ivf I like to write about. I'd love to keep all my semi paleo recipes there too! So I was going to remove the above posts as it's a bit embarrassing (this is the 2nd thread I've done this on now ), but I'll leave them in and maybe copy them over to my blog when I get it organized. Then I will keep my posts to more appropriate updates here and put a link at the bottom of my sig for anyone who has the time or feels like reading more about my life!! Seriously it's like I'm a bit OCD at the moment with all these built up words inside of me, even after I'd showered last night & turned off the computer I had to write in my little book I carry around as I couldn't sleep without doing so! I often think you'd have to be a little obsessive to finish writing a book anyway as it's always been too easy in the past to give up, so I'm going to strike while the iron is hot and keep writing!

    Have a great day girls. Must be so fantastic for you Kate to wake up knowing it's not a dream and you ARE pregnant!!
    Last edited by lissyloulou; 17-05-2013 at 06:30.

  9. #539
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    Hey Betty I just saw you over at the BnB thread and I have always wondered is your real name Betty (which is super cool by the way) or are you BettyW cause you love love love Betty White like me??!!
    If so, no need to say your real name on here, I just wanted to say your username is really cool

  10. #540
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    Lissy I rather enjoyed reading your post. I went through the exact same thing when I lost my rottie a year ago, he was 12 and i got him when I was 21 so he was with me for all the major moments in my life. It was literally the worst experience I ever been through in my life that I have sworn off ever having another pet. I didn't stop crying for three days straight. It breaks my heart every day that he won't be around to watch my daughter grow up, he absolutely loved kids and would have just adored her. So I know exactly how your feeling and so sad to hear of your loss xxx

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to Goldie77 For This Useful Post:

    lissyloulou  (17-05-2013)


 

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