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  1. #61
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    Default Tell me....is forming an opinion and expressing that opinion - the same as `judging'?

    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post

    What is being missed here, is just as someone is allowed to have a provocative opinion, others are allowed to have an opinion against it. Otherwise what I see is a few people going thread to thread causing trouble and derailing then demanding that no one is allowed to say anything or it means they are being bullied.
    Exactly.

    If you believe in something enough to go against the grain, does it really matter what others think of you. Who cares what others say. If you truly believe in something that others don't, who cares. Its like religion. there are many religions out there. I don't believe in forcing beliefs on other people. I don't like people that come knocking on my door to tell me I can be saved. I tell them thanks but no thanks and exit the conversation. I don't care if that is what they believe in. They have the right to believe in whatever they want to. The same as i have the right to believe in what i believe in. If I were to join them in a conversation in religion I expect to have a conversation about religion. if that turns to debate and things get ugly, then I knowingly entered into it with my eyes open. I can't expect them to change their mind and believe in what I believe and vice versa.

    There are certain people in all kind of circles that I don't have conversations about certain topics with. When 2 people are passionate about a subject and have opposing views, you can only accept their view and move on.

    I know rambling.. It makes sense in my head. We have all been jumped on at one stage here. You pick yourself up, learn from it, and move on.

    Sent from my magical black talky thingy using bubhub

  2. #62
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    Buttermilk - It was obviously me you think questioned her 2nd thread as being trouble making. I didn't understand why she didn't contribute to the first thread given she started it. She clarified she had read along to a point, got caught up and by the time she returned it had been closed. I said I understood that and had that happen to me as well so I got it.

    I've been speaking in a general sense more than the Op's situation. I think maybe people responded a bit harshly to her as they felt she had been harsh and it snow balled a bit.

    I do stand behind my comments in a general sense though *not* relating to the OP. Certain people expect to say whatever they wish, offend whole groups of people and no one is allowed to even respond bc that's their opinion and any rebuttal supposedly means bullying.

  3. #63
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    Default Tell me....is forming an opinion and expressing that opinion - the same as `judging'?

    Quote Originally Posted by tannedangel View Post
    I haven't read other replies, but no, having an opinion is not the same as judging.
    I often find that people who feel judged by another's opinion, its because they are not 100% confident in what ever it is that they are doing, so they get defensive.
    Why didn't I just wait for you to put this up. This is what I meant.

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  4. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by lambjam View Post
    I'm baffled by the number of people insisting that forming an opinion is different to (and somehow superior to) judgement. I know what you're trying to get at, but the fact is you're wrong. As I said earlier, Oxford defines "judgement" as "the ability to make considered decisions or come to sensible conclusions".

    You need a new word to describe the behaviour you're talking about, judgement doesn't cut it
    I agree with Vic that said judgment is to form an opinion. being judgemental is criticising someone or something based on your own values.

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  6. #65
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    Default Tell me....is forming an opinion and expressing that opinion - the same as `judging'?

    Quote Originally Posted by αληθη View Post
    How about condescending snob?
    Well that's hardly a sensible conclusion

  7. #66
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    Default Tell me....is forming an opinion and expressing that opinion - the same as `judging'?

    Quote Originally Posted by NancyBlackett View Post
    Well that's hardly a sensible conclusion
    Be good if that was the last word spoken about it

  8. #67
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    Default Tell me....is forming an opinion and expressing that opinion - the same as `judging'?

    Oops I mean anons post about the snob

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  10. #68
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    Default Tell me....is forming an opinion and expressing that opinion - the same as `judging'?

    Snobs* geez!

  11. #69
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  12. #70
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    Default Tell me....is forming an opinion and expressing that opinion - the same as `judging'?

    Quote Originally Posted by Benji View Post
    I have been accused of being in these 'cliques' and clubs because I am a long-term member and I have felt, on several occasions, that I have said something unfair and boy have I been jumped on !!! If *anyone* here says something that is bound to upset, there are consequences.. I've felt it myself and I do believe that most of the time I deserved it lol.

    A lot of the time people responding to the offending statement haven't actually read the responses, so IMO it's not a case of 'bullying' (in fact, often the retaliation is due to the statement being pretty close to bullying itself - singling out of a minority group or whatnot).
    Agree with all of this.

    It doesn't matter who you are, if you're going to post something that you know is going to stir things up, be prepared to have to hash it out.

    I've been around here for a while and have been accused of being in cliques or gangs(lol) simply because I've disagreed and called out someone that has been offensive or rude. I'm not being cliquey, I'm being myself. Sometimes people don't like that and that's cool.

    BH has got all kinds if different personalities floating around. Some are quite, some are forceful, some like to debate and some like to stir things up ALL the time. It makes for some interesting times, but I always remind myself that most people on here don't know me, so their opinion or judgment of me doesn't really need to upset me.
    Last edited by Jakois; 12-02-2013 at 12:37.

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