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  1. #271
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    Default Lock up risk-taking mothers

    Quote Originally Posted by Ffrenchknickers View Post
    I struggle so, so much with the damage that can potentially be done to babies in utero. I am one that strongly believes in the humaness of a foetus and I do find myself conflicted.

    I honestly don't know, other than on and individual and personal level. I wish I knew. All I know is that it would be very rare for someone to sort their lives out because someone in a suit or a white coat tells them to. We need more real people out there on the frontline. I just get sick of the judgement. It helps noone. I would love to be able to help more and I wish I had more answers.
    Very good point

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    Ffrenchknickers  (09-02-2013)

  3. #272
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lovemyfam View Post
    She was helped or at least they tried she went to a group home with therapy etc but broke out and took off to smoke weed, they put her in a great school and offered her a place to live while going to school but she had to stay clean she didnt she skipped school to go get high. Not sure what else they could have done, they tried she didnt care so they took the baby. I just wish they would have gotten that baby far away and never let her see her again but they didnt once she gets out of Juvenal hall for beating someone up so bad they went to the hospital for weeks over you guessed it weed she will get to see the baby because her aunt adopted the baby. So this poor baby who could have escaped this life style has been put right into it, so no doubt the next pregnancy she will do the same why shoudlnt she there was no punishment she still gets to see the baby
    She sounds like a scared child from an abusive home that didn't have the skills to cope with motherhood. No, I don't condone her using. But I think before you have a 'lock her in jail and throw away the kid' mentality you need to recognise the context here. ok the child was taken at birth and the aunty took it. Short time maybe fair enough. But people can and do change.... your approach excludes that possibility.

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  5. #273
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    She sounds like a scared child from an abusive home that didn't have the skills to cope with motherhood. No, I don't condone her using. But I think before you have a 'lock her in jail and throw away the kid' mentality you need to recognise the context here. ok the child taken at birth and the aunty took it. Short time maybe fair enough. But people can and do change.... your approach excludes that possibility.
    Agree

  6. #274
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clementine Grace View Post
    I don't agree in every case. I've seen women have baby after baby all born addicted to drugs when mother has been given every opportunity of help and laughs in the face of it. Even revels in it, not all people are good. How can it be right to let baby after baby be born suffering without intervening.
    I just don't think all women should be put into that basket. Not everyone who is an addict or has a MI is evil. We shouldn't condemn the majority for the small minority that are truely evil.

    This subject is so hard to discuss without putting our own personal experiences on it.

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  8. #275
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    Quote Originally Posted by onionskin View Post
    Her rights as the one who carries the baby, must always come first. I don't always like what that involves, but it must always be the mother that comes first.

    Bodily autonomy is paramount. Always.
    I'm not talking about bodily autonomy. there is already a power to force someone into rehab if certain conditions are met. are you saying if that person also happens to be pregnant then they can no longer be forced?

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  10. #276
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    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
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    I see the flip side- personhood of the fetus horrifying.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MeetTheBluths View Post
    I do Sonja, absolutely. But in my experience someone has to want that for themselves for it to work out that way. No amount of forcing someone will cure them if they are not going to follow through on it. In my cousin's case, she has been institutionalised so many times in her life but she always relapses. She loves her children but is unable to care for them. I really think it can only work if they want it to work - and if they want it to work we will get their permission (fir rehab) and there won't be a need to force them to begin with.

    Im glad it worked out for your relative though. That's really good, buys its just one example.
    It didn't work out. Her husband took his own life as her illness was too much for him. Her kids are adults now and in therapy for the life they had growing up. we all got to sit back on the side lines and watch while lives were destroyed and pick up the pieces where we could.

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    Quote Originally Posted by onionskin View Post
    I just don't think all women should be put into that basket. Not everyone who is an addict or has a MI is evil. We shouldn't condemn the majority for the small minority that are truely evil.

    This subject is so hard to discuss without putting our own personal experiences on it.
    Yeah I'm done with it tbh.

  13. #279
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    Default Lock up risk-taking mothers

    Quote Originally Posted by onionskin View Post
    I just don't think all women should be put into that basket. Not everyone who is an addict or has a MI is evil. We shouldn't condemn the majority for the small minority that are truely evil.

    This subject is so hard to discuss without putting our own personal experiences on it.
    I don't think they should either, I wasn't saying that. I just think there are some some cases which are complex and are hard to put in a basket. I never said everyone with an addiction is evil, I don't believe that.

    Isn't it our personal experiences of life that help shape out opinions on such issues? Talking about it from a philosophical level is one thing, but real life experience is what make it real. Everyone on here shares personal experience.

  14. #280
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clementine Grace View Post
    I don't think they should either, I wasn't saying that. I just think there are some some cases which are complex and are hard to put in a basket. I never said everyone with an addiction is evil, I don't believe that.

    Isn't it our personal experiences of life that help shape out opinions on such issues? Talking about it from a philosophical level is one thing, but real life experience is what make it real. Everyone on here shares personal experience.
    The whole basket thing is what I balk at. I don't know how it would work but I wish society didn't have these blanket rules and judgements for *everybody.*

    I agree re. the personal experiences. I have learnt more in my life from people's real life experiences than I have from any other source.

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