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  1. #1
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    Default Leaving 18 month old while I travel overseas

    Ok deep breath... My husband is traveling overseas to Europe for one month in the middle of the year for work, and I have decided to go for a few weeks except ... I have decided to leave my daughter (who will be 18 months old then) at home with my father in law.

    I'm feeling nervous but very confident in his abilities, he's in his late 60's but very fit and active, and absolutely adores my daughter, having cared for her many times in the past, albeit only for a day at a time.

    We are doing all sorts of things in the lead up to the trip to make sure everyone comfortable and happy such as lots of overnights stays and time where DD and FIL can spend together bonding more, so that side of things doesn't worry me at all. I know DD will be fine and in great hands, to be honest FIL is waaaay more patient and spends more time playing with her on the floor than I've ever had time to lol.

    My questions for you lovely mumma's is, do I need to make any other "official" arrangements such as written consent to medical treatment, letting local police know, etc?? I have already lined up several local friends and neighbors to drop in and be generally be available day/night in case FIL needs help with anything.

    We've had mixed reactions (mostly supportive though) from our friends and other family members, some of them think we are a bit crazy! So please, no judgements as we've pretty much heard it all. :-)

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    Default Leaving 18 month old while I travel overseas

    We did something very similar only ours was just three weeks. We wrote out a letter stating our daughter will be in the care of parents in law. Let the dr clinics know as well as daycare. But I don't think you HAVE to. I think it's a great idea, everyone needs time out.
    Another thing we did leading up was longer (3-4 night stays) rather then just overnighters. And our parents in law stayed at our house so everything was familiar and as normal as possible.
    Good luck and have fun.

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    Default Leaving 18 month old while I travel overseas

    I have no specific experience, but would suggest some longer stays before you go. Overnight is a huge difference to a few weeks - for both your DD and your FIL!

    I think it's a great idea to have your doctor informed and perhaps give your FIL a letter of authority - just for emergency situations.

    Have you though about your FIL staying at your place? This would make it more 'normal' for your DD and perhaps be easier for your FIL too. Whilst my DS loves visiting others, home has all of his toys and keeps him entertained on his own longer.

    Good luck - I don't think there's anything wrong at all with what you are doing. Although personally I couldn't do it, especially with my FIL or Dad - they would freak after a day!!

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    Default Leaving 18 month old while I travel overseas

    Yes I should have mentioned he will be staying at our place during that time. Definitely easier than having to childproof his own house!

    The other complicating factor is that he will be going overseas himself soon, and returning only a few days before I fly out :-$

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    I agree with chickpea. Get Enduring Power of Attorney organised through a lawyer. It doesn't ahve to be your FIL, but it needs to be someone you trust A LOT who is allowed to access your finances. The idea is that if something happens overseas they are legally able to access your money and can even sell your house/car/etc if needed. Might sound a bit extreme, but it's good if you have someone who trust that much who can be in charge of your finances when you go. This is a good idea irrespective of whether your dd is with you or not.

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    If he is going overseas first and only back a few days before you go how will you test the longer stays etc? Assuming everything will be booked what will you do if it doesn't go well?

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    Default Leaving 18 month old while I travel overseas

    Umm. We won't!

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    Default Leaving 18 month old while I travel overseas

    Children are very flexible and have great coping skills. Everything will be fine. We skyped our daughter which worked well.

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    Default Leaving 18 month old while I travel overseas

    We left 3 children with MIL last year for 2 weeks. She is not a constant in their lives as she lives on the other side of the country so we didn't have any contact before we left.
    I never thought about a consent form, that sounds like a great idea.
    MIL came to our house and we wrote a huge list of where the kids were when so their daily activities stayed the same. We wrote what they generally ate and when.

    Hope you all have great time. Get FIL
    to take lots of pictures of their time together so your DD can look back on their special time together.

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    Default Leaving 18 month old while I travel overseas

    Thanks so much for the helpful suggestions! My husband visited the local police today and they also suggested written consent, letting our local doctor know, and getting our wills done.


 

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