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  1. #1
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    Default Is this 'normal' toddler behaviour?

    I'm worried about my 26 mo DD's behaviour which has changed drastically over the last couple of weeks. She's always been a little on the shy side but it's gotten much worse lately. If I take her somewhere like the library, park etc, she wants me standing right next to her and will cry 'Mummy coming, mummy coming' if I don't go immediately over. I've taken her to friends houses, where she has been before, and she is sooo clingy - when I try to talk to my friends she'll try and hit me every time I say something (and we'll have to leave because she gets so upset). It's like she wants all the attention on her. We've had friends here for a BBQ and she refuses to come on the balcony where we are, but screams if we leave her in the adjoining room with toys, TV etc. Shes taken to sometimes refusing to get in her car seat or pram when we're out and I can't physically get her into them. She would like to be at home the whole time with just her and me (and maybe DH). It's a bit isolating! She's also started throwing some major tantrums at home, but I was expecting that to start.

    The only things which have changed are: I'm 24 weeks pregnant (and have been quite sick with it although a lot better now), and she's been teething her 2nd molars quite badly (3 are fully through now, and the last one is half way through). Could this explain anything or is this just the terrible twos? I'm finding it difficult to know how to discipline her because if it's because she's in pain or unsure because of the pregnancy, I don't want to be too hard on her.

    Any ideas of what I can do to help/reassure her? She has a large vocab but talking and explaining things to her doesn't seem to help much.

  2. #2
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    Default Is this 'normal' toddler behaviour?

    DD went through a horrible phase when she was a similar age and I think it was her molars. She is an introverted girl anyway but it was sooo much worse around her second birthday. At our weekly family dinner we had to feed her away from everyone because she would cry if anyone looked at her or tried to talk to her. She buried her head when my immediate family (who she sees at least twice a week) sung happy birthday to her. It lasted a while here (maybe a month or so?) but she is so much better now. Hopefully it's just the molars bothering her or a short phase that will pass

  3. #3
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    I was reading the first part and I thought ... you're pregnant! And then I read the 2nd paragraph and you are . I suspect seeing your body change more dramatically in the last month or so has probably affected her more than you realised. My ds was 4 when I was pregnant and his behaviour changed and I didn't realise it was pregnancy related til my pregnancy was over and he was so much more relaxed. He was quite clingy and yet liked to push the boundaries (eg. drawing on carpet with black texta!!). The bottom line was that I needed to set boundaries and follow through, but he also needed lots of lots of cuddles.

    My mum had my brother when my other brother was 3 and she said he (the 3yo) barely left her side for the last 3 months of her pregnancy. It drove her nuts, but he knew things were changing dramatically, but couldn't understand exactly so he was super clingy. Knowing this helped me understand my ds. My ds was nearly 5 when my dd was born so I thought I'd be able to reassure him with words about how things would change when his sister came along, but no about of talking, reading stories about babies, etc, stopped his anxiety ... but I think it did reduce it.

    So, lots and lots of cuddles. When you are out & about lots of reassurance about the fact that you are there and you're not going anywhere, etc, etc. Let her stay close to you if she wants to (that's pretty normal toddler behaviour on it's own). If she's just not able to be calmed down I think leaving probably is the best thing (she may be tired, overwhelmed, getting sick or just plain stressed).

    All the best!

  4. #4
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    Its pretty normal!
    Especially when you have a baby coming too, im sure shes aware of that, most of my boys have gone thru this and there is light at the end of the tunnel!
    My advice:
    When shes hitting you ect, be very firm with her not too, that is one thing toddlers cannot get away with, otherwise it can escalate, i found i let ds1 do whatever, hitting and scratching me thinking it was all normal toddler behaviours and being pregnant with ds2 he seemed to lash out a lot more than the other children as a toddler, but this was not the case, saying that tho he is now a very well balanced 8 year old
    I personally just always try to reassure the little ones how loved they are. She is 2 years old and probably understands you more than you think. I also think just from your post you need to be more authoritative with her, dont get me wrong, im sure your an awesome mumma, but kids needs boundaries and honestly it sounds like shes pushing them, just to see how far she can get.
    Another thing is and this might be off topic but as much as you can include her in the pregnancy, dont fob it off that shes little and wont understand, or be interested chances are she will! Ive always read books about the baby or shown the younger ones on the net how the baby is growing and ive also found those email updates you can sign up for have great pictures and showing them and explaining the developmental stages or her little brother/sister can really help the bonding process with siblings.
    Anyways those are just what i have done with my kids! hope it helps!

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    Default Is this 'normal' toddler behaviour?

    My 2 year olds behaviour has changed a lot in the past week or so which has coincided with her molars coming through. I think she has been in pain and has a low tolerance of life at the moment and finding it difficult to communicate this so is having a lot of meltdowns

    Oh and she has a 7 week old sister!

  6. #6
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    Thanks so much for the replies - its good to know others have gone/are going through the same kind of thing and there is light at the end of the tunnel! It's given me a few ideas on how I should be dealing with this.


 

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