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  1. #41
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    Default Re: Parenting 'labels'

    I don't label my self, as a pp said I never heard about labels until joiining bh,

    I dnt breastfeed due to my milk not coming in,

    I can't baby wear due to being very small and my son is a big boy, I also fell pregnant when my son was 4 months old

    I co slept with my son until he was 9 months old and his cot is now in my room

    I have never been one for cc, ill pick my son up as soon as he cries and have always sang my son to sleep "

    I have also never had anyone watch my son

    And to me this is just being a mum to the best of my abbilities.
    Sent from my ZTE T60 using BubHub

  2. #42
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    Default Parenting 'labels'

    I am definitely a slacker mum, and identify with the free range parenting ideals too. I don't really fall into the AP category.....

  3. #43
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    Default Re: Parenting 'labels'

    Quote Originally Posted by Plexus Solaire View Post
    I was reading about AP last night on here as well and it also occured to me that the description matched much of the way I parent... and it left me thinking, isn't this pretty much the way we all do it, give or take a few things? While I coudn't bf, I definitely soothe bubs and never allow her to cry beyond maybe 20 seconds.. I usually bring her into bed with me half way through the night and she sleeps with us after her feed. In 6 months I have never been away from her or had her babysat, but I never even thought about it, it's just the way things are. I too did not know that if you did things a certain way you were XYZ type of parent.
    I just do what FEELS RIGHT/NATURAL for US. Don't we all?
    Honestly in my opinion, these labels are stupid, made up rubbish.
    I think it depends on where you live and environment, possibly how you were raised. I was hammered with advice to not parent intuitively when jasper was born to the point I felt sick with guilt like I was failing him by being responsive. And finding out that AP was actually a "thing" was an enormous relief for me. It validated what I was doing and feeling, because my environment was trying to tell me I was doing it wrong.

    But if everyone around you is responsive and nobody is suggesting otherwise then it's good that the term AP seems totally redundant and stupid.

    And actually I was briefly seeing a psychologist after katelyn was born who kept telling me I needed to do controlled crying and that I shouldn't be so quick to pick katelyn up when she fussed during sessions, she also told me I needed to do cc on my 4 year old because I mentioned he falls asleep in my arms every night and as soon as I said well actually I respond to my children SHE started going on about "people who do attachment parenting" like it was totally absurd to parent responsively.

    So unfortunately........ To some people..... It's not really rubbish that it's a "thing", including people who think that the label simply identifies some parents as crazy hippies.

    (I didn't go back to that psych by the way. I was so shocked she seemed to have genuine compassion for adult humans, just not for little ones)

  4. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boobycino View Post
    I think it depends on where you live and environment, possibly how you were raised. I was hammered with advice to not parent intuitively when jasper was born to the point I felt sick with guilt like I was failing him by being responsive. And finding out that AP was actually a "thing" was an enormous relief for me. It validated what I was doing and feeling, because my environment was trying to tell me I was doing it wrong.

    But if everyone around you is responsive and nobody is suggesting otherwise then it's good that the term AP seems totally redundant and stupid.

    And actually I was briefly seeing a psychologist after katelyn was born who kept telling me I needed to do controlled crying and that I shouldn't be so quick to pick katelyn up when she fussed during sessions, she also told me I needed to do cc on my 4 year old because I mentioned he falls asleep in my arms every night and as soon as I said well actually I respond to my children SHE started going on about "people who do attachment parenting" like it was totally absurd to parent responsively.

    So unfortunately........ To some people..... It's not really rubbish that it's a "thing", including people who think that the label simply identifies some parents as crazy hippies.

    (I didn't go back to that psych by the way. I was so shocked she seemed to have genuine compassion for adult humans, just not for little ones)

    Isnt that awful advice coming from a so called professional!! With my first son I remember going to this dr for his 6 month check up . She asked I he slept in his cot and I said no he sleeps with me. She was really shocked that at 6 months he had never slept in his cot and said I was doing wrong thing as babies need to learn to be alone. I ignored her because my instinct was so strong an i also had a strong instinct something was not quite right. Turns out my oldest has autism and has since day one( he did not regress like some) I'm so glad I kept him close , he was always with me and feeling safe. I wonder sometimes if I had taken her advice and others who told me to CiO how much worse he would be and how much further into his own world he would be. I think I parent on instinct like we all do , I'm stubborn and don't take advice unless it feels right. I do fall into the attachment parent bracket but just never thought about it. But your right boobycino it's good to know that it is a style of parenting and it's ok to follow when you have a GP or family telling you to do things you feel are not right for you or baby.

  5. #45
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    Default Parenting 'labels'

    I just follow my instincts, and I go with the flow. I'll take advice but ultimately we do what ever works. DD is happy and a very easy baby... I like to think its because she's happy and I've met her needs.
    Couldn't imagine any other way really.

  6. #46
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    well now I know the term CIO ...I did that (stiil do)..I also did CC....but I don't think I used those terms ever..I just would let my girl cry sometimes.."self settle" etc...

    I BF for about 3 months then gave up ..way to hard (with my next maybe try for 6 months..no more then that)
    I never wore my baby (I loved my pram to much)
    I never co slept..well maybe a few times when she wouldnt settle..or when we fell asleep cuddling..


    I also tried the method of SIS (screaming in shower ..when I was so tired and felt like a crazy zombie)

    I also did this a lot LRTB...(leave room take breath)

  7. #47
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    I'd probably call myself a free-range parent.

    I know a lot of people on here would be horrified by the things I let DD do

  8. #48
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    Default Parenting 'labels'

    I have never labelled myself AP, but I think everyone would have some AP values with their own parenting.

    I think like witwicky said, some people are too competitive about it, especially some people on here. I've never encountered it in real life, but I don't join AP groups or know anyone who is a parent who uses the AP label.

  9. #49
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    So what's a free range parent? I might be that also .... Both my boys are outside pecking at dirt most days ha ha !

  10. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by babynomad View Post
    So what's a free range parent? I might be that also .... Both my boys are outside pecking at dirt most days ha ha !
    Lol.. it's basically the opposite of helicopter parenting.

    "Fighting the belief that our children are in constant danger from creeps, kidnapping, germs, grades, flashers, frustration, failure, baby snatchers, bugs, bullies, men, sleepovers and/or the perils of a non-organic grape."

    http://www.freerangekids.com/

  11. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to shelle65 For This Useful Post:

    ChickyBee  (28-01-2013),kw123  (28-01-2013)


 
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