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  1. #11
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    Default Confused. Not sure what to think/do

    I do believe in a way he will come around. Or at least I hope he does.
    How much time to I give him. I'm happy to give him as much time as he needs but then again it's not going to be easy by myself. I just don't know.

  2. #12
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    Default Re: Confused. Not sure what to think/do

    Quote Originally Posted by lucymoo View Post
    I was in a similar situation aside from having kids prior. Had only been seeing FOB for 4 months before I fell pregnant. He was dead against me keeping the baby, but I couldn't have a termination. We tried to make it work but when DD was 3 months off 2yo, I left him. We have 50/50 shared care of DD now and while he's a deadest pr!ck, he's a good dad and loves DD. He also has mental health issues but refuses to see anyone about it.
    Sorry to go off topic, but it's nice to see no matter what you think of fob you acknowledge that he's a good dad. I don't often hear people seperate the two
    Sorry if that sounds weird lol

  3. #13
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    headoverfeet is offline The truth will set you free, but first it will **** you off. -Gloria Steinem
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    I agree I would make my decision based on worst case scenario, how will you cope emotionally raising 3 children alone, how will finances play a part, what kind of family/hands on support do you have, what can you put in place to help with any of these things.

    I have had a termination after having children and I do think the decision process is different to pre-children. I never thought I would have one but I did and I don't regret it.

  4. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by mumoftwoprincess View Post
    He does want a baby.

    His anxiety is acting up and he's convinced himself it's not a good time (which I suppose it's not - but it's happened). And like I said we've DTD once this month. 6days after my app said I should have ovulated! And it's the only time we've done it where he hasn't pulled out or worn a condom. I mean COME ON!!
    Sounds like the chances are high he will come around

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    I have just found out I am seven weeks pregnant. I am 44 years of age and concerned for the child due to my age. I do not have any other children and do not know what to expect. What are the risks at my age? My partner is 51 which is also a factor. I am confused whether to have this child or terminate.

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by harrythecat View Post
    I have just found out I am seven weeks pregnant. I am 44 years of age and concerned for the child due to my age. I do not have any other children and do not know what to expect. What are the risks at my age? My partner is 51 which is also a factor. I am confused whether to have this child or terminate.
    Have you spoken to an OB or the like?

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    Plenty of women have their first baby after 40, I know a women who had 2 after 40. You have an increased risk of chromosomal abnormalities but the risk is still fairly low really.
    I wouldn't make the decision to terminate based on your age. If you are willing and able to raise the baby and you want to keep it, at least wait until after the 12 week scan to see if there are any problems with the baby. There is every chance bub could be perfectly healthy.

  8. #18
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    so from what I read. You were still having sex but just using the pull out method, BUT .. 10 days before AF you both had sex and uh, followed through?

    Clearly the pull out method doesnt work

    Unfortunately, do what you need to do and id base it purely on if he does leave .. then you need to be happy with your life. If he does stay. You wont know that etc (and he probably doesnt right now either) so just make yourself happy

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    Quote Originally Posted by MrsR2012 View Post
    so from what I read. You were still having sex but just using the pull out method, BUT .. 10 days before AF you both had sex and uh, followed through?

    Clearly the pull out method doesnt work

    Unfortunately, do what you need to do and id base it purely on if he does leave .. then you need to be happy with your life. If he does stay. You wont know that etc (and he probably doesnt right now either) so just make yourself happy

    The only time we were together this month (cycle) was 9-10 days before AF was due!

    So I must have ovulated late

  10. #20
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    Also. I've decided I'm keeping the baby. I tried to consider the alternative we discussed it even. But I just know I wouldn't (mentally) recover from that.
    I M/C twice in 2004 and they still play a big part in my mental state and I had no control over losing them.


 

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