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  1. #1
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    Default Feeling flustered :( LONG vent!

    I feel so stressed, tired and just flustered today. Some days I can keep it together and some days like today I just get so stressed! Feel like I need a serious break, feel like crying out loud, feel like digging a hole and hide!

    The worst thing is that I dont even have someone that I can talk to about my feelings or chat about how sh*t my day is. All my friends work funny hours and lives hours apart (we moved since I got pregnant and have grown apart since I had kids) and my family lives in NZ.

    I have only DH to talk to, but as much as he wants to understand how I feel, he doesnt. He would take things I say personally, eg if i tell him how busy i have been, he would think i am saying that he does nothing. We just end up in arguements and stress me out even more.

    Everyday, not just today, I wake up at 5am to feed my 3month old, trying to put her back to sleep while my 2 year old screams for my morning cuddles. When I cant attend to him immediately he just screams usually waking up my 3 months old and both end up crying.
    DS screams while I make his breakfast, he screams for cuddles, want to watch Hi 5 (i turn it on, he whinges, i turn it off he whinges, he wants to watch hi 5, i turn to hi 5, he still whinges because he wants me to dance with him and then he would still whinge because he wants me to pickhim up and hold him while i dance along with hi 5). i give him breakfast he has a few spoon full and I quickly shove down my breakfast, then he whinges wanting to go to the park, if i say no or later or soon he screams. i wash the dishes while trying to keep him entertained. then i try to do some work (dh and I work from home) while DS cries wanting to sit on my lap, stand on my work desk, play with my computer, write on my book, want me to draw him pictures, tempering with the printer. It takes me seriously an hour to do a job that could have been done in 20 min. I am wrestling with him the whole time while i am trying to work! Then my 3 month old wakes up, i need to drop everything and go and tend to her, give her a feed change her whatever, talk to her a bit while DS follows me around and jumps on my bed and trying to play with power cords, so I try to feed DD and keep DS occupied at the same time, usually he would scream while I am feeding because he wants something and I cant give it to him there and then.
    Then i put DD down on the rocker and get DS some morning tea, DD then starts crying, so I go back and pick DD up from the rocker while DS finally behaves for 15 minutes. Then we go to the park, and come home both kids asleep!! OMG that hour of my day is my lifesaver!!
    While they are asleep I cook lunch and by the time I finished cooking and some washing they both awake. and then I dont even know how I spend the following 3 hours! both screaming in my ear, trying to breastfeed DD and then entertain DS, running around the house like a mad woman. AND trying to do my work at the same time! We have 2 online stores and we pack so many packages a day also replying emails and talking to suppliers. I feel like I have no time to breath! Then DH goes out to do postage and he would take DS with him, so I can have a break, but I dont get a break because DD usually is very unsettled during that time of the day. After finally settling her, I need to cook, then DH and DS comes home to eat, then I do the dishes, then bath DD and shower with DS (I dont even get to shower alone or go to the bath room alone!)
    Then 7pm comes, DH puts DS to bed and I put DD to bed and boy I look forward to that time of the day! Then DS still wakes up once a night and DD wakes up hourly from 7pm to 11am then she sleeps through till 5am and the day starts all over again.
    Today with all that going on + I was trying to clean the toilet and put away some toys and do some washing and clean the floor and plan meals ad reconciliate accounts.....URGGGHHH!!!

    When I talk to DH about it he feels offended. I know hes working too, constantly packing all day. But I still feel resentment towards him. I resettle both kids at night, I do work after they are asleep while he plays xbox or watches TV or surfing the net. I do work at night so that the next day I dont have so much work to do so I can watch the kids and do the rest of my work, while he does work. I usually finish working at 12am!

    Even coming up on bubhub I have to do it quickly during my toilet break or in the mid of the night!

    Sorry for those who has the patience to read all this this is a long vent!

    Tell me i am not alone...!

  2. #2
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    That sounds unsustainable. To be doing so much work while caring for a baby and toddler, is a practically impossible task. Would it be possible to put your 2 year old in daycare for at least one day?

    Massive hugs.

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    tubster  (25-01-2013)

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    When my second child came along (14 months apart), I seriously felt like I had lost my mind for the first year. I was so exhausted. I used to cry in the shower almost every day. It doesn't seem like it but things will get easier.... Just hang in there and try not to lose your mind

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    Default Feeling flustered :( LONG vent!

    Oh my you poor thing!!
    i don't know how you do it all.
    Wonder Woman!!!

    I only have a 4 month old & she is very good but id say you are definitely not alone in feeling like this & will get a lot of replies.

    I hope in time that it gets better for you.

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    azoid  (25-01-2013),tubster  (25-01-2013)

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    oh hun, i hear you! It was almost like i was reading about my own life except we have a 5 week old, a 2 year old and a 4 year old.. and i'm trying to do our office work whilst hubby is out working all day.. some days all i do is cry and scream like a lunatic.

    if you ever want to chat feel free to pm me. xo

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    Default Feeling flustered :( LONG vent!

    Quote Originally Posted by MissMuppet View Post


    That sounds unsustainable. To be doing so much work while caring for a baby and toddler, is a practically impossible task. Would it be possible to put your 2 year old in daycare for at least one day?

    Massive hugs.
    We have thought about it and have decided that we will put him in daycare once he's toilet trained at the moment when I have a melt down DH usually takes DS to MILs so it's more manageable. That's usually I'm our busiest day Monday mornings :S

  11. #7
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    Default Feeling flustered :( LONG vent!

    Quote Originally Posted by Minchi View Post
    oh hun, i hear you! It was almost like i was reading about my own life except we have a 5 week old, a 2 year old and a 4 year old.. and i'm trying to do our office work whilst hubby is out working all day.. some days all i do is cry and scream like a lunatic.

    if you ever want to chat feel free to pm me. xo
    Wow! How do you do it! I always wanted 3 kids but I am seriously reconsidering it!

  12. #8
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    Default Feeling flustered :( LONG vent!

    Massive hugs. You are so not alone. I have just the one child (2 year old DS who sounds every bit as challenging as yours is) plus do a bit of work from home plus the majority of household chores and that's almost enough to just about push me over the edge somedays... I don't think I could handle it all with a young baby as well! I can relate to not being able to complain to DH for fear of triggering that old gem of an argument about who works harder/longer etc too...

    Agree with PP - is daycare an option for your DS for just 1-2 days per week? When all else fails I find escaping from the house for an hour or so helps, even if it's just a walk up to the local park. Helps me clear my head a little and helps DS exert some of his excess energy so he's not as full-on when we get back home...

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    Default Re: Feeling flustered :( LONG vent!

    I'm tired just reading that, so I'm sure you're exhausted!
    Could you possibly do some of the paper/computer work after your DS has gone to bed? I know its hard to get motivated at night, but sometimes its easier to get things done when there are no interruptions.
    Is it possible to make it a permanent arrangement for your DS to go to your MILs every Monday (or whatever day works for you all) for the whole day. Your DH could pick him on his way out to do the posting?
    Don't know if my suggestions are plausible.
    I can assure you that it will get less chaotic, you just have to survive the chaos in the meantime! Good luck.

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    tubster  (25-01-2013)

  16. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by tubster View Post
    Wow! How do you do it! I always wanted 3 kids but I am seriously reconsidering it!

    it's really hard some days. really hard. but then i have rewarding days too.


 

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