All of the examples given here pretty much apply to me, especially as it allowed DH to have the same bonding experiences with DS as I had.
I simply could not breast feed, despite many attempts, but regardless I cannot say that I was unhappy with this outcome as the whole process of breast feeding did not appeal to me.
Before dd was born, dh and I were certain she would be bf. In hindsight, given that both my mother and grandmother struggled with bf, perhaps I was a tad unrealistic. Once she was born, it was a whole different story. She screamed constantly, I couldn't get her to latch, she lost weight. I was a mess. The clinic nurse told me I had an "angry baby", she actually wrote that in the blue book. I was not offered any help, until I ran out of the clinic in tears, and my mother put her foot down and demanded they help me. Long story short, she ended up on formula and meds for reflux. I have supply issues, and was told that I would probably need medication to boost it if I tried to bf again.
When Ds was born, I promised myself no pressure. He latched better, and screamed less, but my supply was still low, he had an infection in hospital, and ended up being comped in special care. I took motilium, comped, expressed, bfed. All day. While my 2yo watched tv. All day. I lasted three months, and it never got any easier for me.
What I like about ff? I got so stressed bfing. It consumed me, I worried when I should have been sleeping, thought of nothing else. I worried so much that I never felt "that bond" I am supposed to feel when bfing. When I ff, I was relaxed. My kids were happy. I finally got to enjoy my baby, and being a mum.
I hate how ff is taboo. I always feel like I am supposed to be ashamed of my failure as a mother. But I have these two healthy, beautiful, awesome kids. What should I be ashamed of?
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I bf my ds 11 months and dd 6 months. Because of allergies I had to cut out dairy, soy, wheat, eggs and gluten. It was sheer hell.... I look back now and wish there had of been a thread like this to ease my guilt and tell me I was still a good mum if i ff. I got really sick with PND and anxiety to the point of being hospitalised and have no doubt that the stress of breast feeding added and prolonged my illness. I wish I had of been better supported to ff as BFing was so obviously affecting my mental health.
This is such a warm fuzzy thread beautiful to see...
Thankyou so much for this thread. (I've nearly come to terms with the reality that "breast or bottle" isn't a choice like it's made out to be.)
Things I love about bottle feeding:
The babies aren't hungry after a feed. And they put on weight.
I don't need to take my top off to feed both babies at the same time (no way was I a discreet BFer, especially with wearing a twin BF pillow - I felt like a dodgem car), so ...
... I'm able to leave the house now.
I have time to sleep (and to read BH).
It's so much quicker than BFing, then bottle-comping, then pumping. They're now back to sleep at night in less time than just the BF used to take.
I have more time to interact with my babies.
Great thread! I too struggled for 6 weeks trying to BF and express, and it consumed me. I had a terrible first 6 weeks.
Once I gave myself permission to switch to full time FF it was sunny days for us. And DD slept 7-7 from 11 weeks old
I highly recommend this website all about supporting formula feeders:
And I found this article reassuring when dealing with the worry over FF being "allegedly" inferior to BF:
I have one friend that always puts down FFing - I used to hear her judging other friends who FF'd early on, so when I had to FF it really affected me. She's lucky that BF came so easily to her - she's never known what it's like to struggle with it.
If we end up FFing our next baby I am going to hold my head high and be proud that I can feed my child the milk that my healthy, smart DD has thrived on.
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