+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 19
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Posts
    2
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    0
    Reviews
    0

    Default Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    DH has recently decided to start going to boxing training weekly on Friday nights starting 8.30pm. Unfortunately this is also when the kids (4 mth old and a very demanding 3 yr old) bedtime starts. He promises to help me sort out the kids before going, but as bedtime routine starts creeping past 8.30pm the "I'd rather be else where look" is plastered all over his face. I have asked if he can postpone any activities for a few mths till things get easier to which he replied he "needs" to exercise now. This infuriated me as I would not think to leave him to attend to the kids bedtime routine alone, but he thought it was quite ok.

    DH has also given me "the heads up" that in a few mths he'll also be starting footy whIch will require training on Wednesday nights starting 7pm (so i'll have to wing it alone with dinner and bedtime) and matches on Sunday (so our day would have to revolve around the matches).

    I am feeling angry and feel he is rather self indulgent with himself. I have no problems with his activities, but the timing is just bad. I don't understand why he can't wait till our routine gets easier. I think I'm getting upset coz he has the ability to give himself permission to pursue these activities and I haven't (good ol' mother guilt).

    Am I getting fired up about nothing? Anyway I needed to rant and get it out of my system.

  2. #2
    HugsBunny's Avatar
    HugsBunny is offline Once upon a time there was a bunny.........
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    6,603
    Thanks
    4,531
    Thanked
    1,966
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts

    Default Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    That would **** me off.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Posts
    1,665
    Thanks
    177
    Thanked
    347
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    I don't think you are being unreasonable. I'd be really annoyed too. In particular the football would really annoy me. I'd have something to say about that!
    My DH goes to soccer every sat night until 8:30... My solution is that dd gets to stay up late that night until daddy gets home and then he gets her to sleep when he gets home.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2011
    Posts
    240
    Thanks
    179
    Thanked
    98
    Reviews
    0

    Default Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    I would definitely have issues with that!

    Of course he should have his time to exercise, but not at a busy time like that!

    I hope you can get him to see this op

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Posts
    1,083
    Thanks
    123
    Thanked
    402
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    TBH I think your getting wound up unnecessarily.

    Is there a weekly evening activity you could take up on another evening so you get your own time out?

  6. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to 2Bboys For This Useful Post:

    babycart  (21-01-2013),peanutmonkey  (21-01-2013)

  7. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    7,053
    Thanks
    6,263
    Thanked
    5,481
    Reviews
    4
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a weekBusiest Member of the Week - Most posts for the week ending 5/6/2014

    Default Re: Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    One night a week I wouldn't personally have a problem with, so long as I could have a night off too. My husband goes out to play poker one night a week and I go out with my bestie once every few weeks but have the option to go out once a week (I'm just not into going out for the sake of it).

    We've been doing it this way since I was pregnant with DS2, and my kids are now 2.5, 4.5 and one on the way.

    However, if you are not happy with it, then I think you should talk to him and try to come to a compromise. Perhaps that maybe whilst he is partaking in football that he gives up the other night out?

    Sent from my GT-I9305T using BubHub

  8. #7
    threechooks's Avatar
    threechooks is offline If my spelling annoys you that's your problem.... I have better things to do than proofread !
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    1,654
    Thanks
    402
    Thanked
    420
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Do you work outside the home? Why such a late routine? Why don't you do an earlier routine, then he can get away by 7:30 and you can put your feet up?
    Dinner is at 5:30 for my kids, bath at 6, bed at 7:15pm....Feet up at 7:16pm. I go out often at 7:30pm. Coffee with friends, hobby groups, yoga etc.

    Men need time out too.

  9. The Following User Says Thank You to threechooks For This Useful Post:

    babycart  (21-01-2013)

  10. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Posts
    251
    Thanks
    106
    Thanked
    50
    Reviews
    0

    Default Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    I really don't see the big deal, it's one week. Football might be a different story.

  11. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    747
    Thanks
    132
    Thanked
    395
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    It is unfair yes, with babies that age and at night by yourself
    If he needs to exercise he needs to pick another time

  12. #10
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Sunshine North
    Posts
    859
    Thanks
    64
    Thanked
    223
    Reviews
    5
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts

    Default Am I getting wound up about nothing?

    Quote Originally Posted by threechooks View Post
    Do you work outside the home? Why such a late routine? Why don't you do an earlier routine, then he can get away by 7:30 and you can put your feet up?
    Dinner is at 5:30 for my kids, bath at 6, bed at 7:15pm....Feet up at 7:16pm. I go out often at 7:30pm. Coffee with friends, hobby groups, yoga etc.

    Men need time out too.
    That sounds wonderful. I wish my DS would go to bed like that bout routine is more like dinner at 6, bath and in bed and books by 7. Lights out 7:15. Pee at 7:18, 7:28, 7:35. Protests for more pee from 7:40-8:00. If I'm really lucky sleep and feet up for me by 8:15. If I'm not lucky I can still be waiting at 9.

    OP - I'd be annoyed too. We have both occasionally gone out durin the bedtime routine, but we only have one.


 

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
Bamboo Lulu
Super soft, fun prints & basics for baby, made from bamboo & organic cotton plus non-toxic wooden toys. • Hypoallergenic - perfect for eczema relief • Everything needed to shop for a baby shower • 10% off + FREE gift with purchase. Use code BUBHUB
sales & new stuffsee all
The Health Hub
Give a new mum a fitness boost for Christmas & New Year. Studio-based, small group training sessions - cardio, strength, core, Pilates & boxing. Choice of 16 hrs per week, flexible-arrival feature - bubs & kids welcome! Gift vouchers available.
featured supporter
Swim Australia
Swim Australia are the leading learn-to-swim experts, and national swim school authority. With over 600 Registered Swim Schools located across the country, through our aquatic education, we aim to build a Safer, Smarter, Stronger nation of swimmers.
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!