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  1. #21
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    Default Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    I didn't have one as we were in the position of being able to provide everything we could possibly need for our baby ourselves. I felt (and it's just fine if you feel differently) that as we were in this position, pre-birth gifts were unnecessary. I caught up with my friends pre-birth as we normally always had, and having an organised get together solely because a birth was imminent seemed a redundant idea. I happily accepted gifts and cards for the baby once she was born from our close friends and family. Even then we ended up with a mountain of stuff! All gratefully received, but I can't imagine what I would have done with the extra gifts a baby shower would have entailed!

    There are plenty of situations where I could foresee that a baby shower might be appropriate for others, it just wasn't needed for me.

  2. #22
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    Default Re: Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    Quote Originally Posted by Cue View Post
    I think its really unfair to assume its a gift grab! Mine wasn't a gift grab, I spent months asking people to stop/not buy me things! But my mum, ILs, and my friends really wanted to organise one for me (first grandchild and a difficult TTC journey so plenty to celebrate!) and I wasn't going to get all negative about it and refuse. They got just as much out of it as I did! Everyone got to eat heaps of nice food and drink nice champers so I hardly took a gift at the door and asked where their food platter was!

    Obviously some people get wrapped up in it like a PP's friend but it's not always the case.
    It's easy to get that vibe when you're invited to baby showers for people that you have met once or people that have never laid eyes on your almost 2 year old child, clearly you aren't friends. Or when every baby shower that you're invited to has stipulated what gifts they want. Or when you hear remarks that 'betty blue only gave me this'. Or when there are always threads on bubhub about ways to tell people that you want certain presents or gifts cards. Or when the Mum-to-be makes specific lay-bys for people to put money on. Or when so many people think it's only acceptable to have a baby shower for your first otherwise you're double dipping in the present department.

    Like I said in my OP, I would much rather catch up for my last lunch with friends/family before the baby comes, no strings attached, then if people want to bring a present after bub is born, so be it, but not when it's obligatory.

    If baby showers aren't about the presents, as everyone seems to tell themselves, then why isn't it okay to have more than one baby shower?

  3. #23
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    Default Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    I got thrown a suprise baby shower for DD1 which was nice. It was a dozen of my close family & friends.

    I declined to have one for DD2 and not having one this time either.

    I only attend baby showers for good friends & family. I wouldn't attend one for a friend of a friend etc as id wonder why i was invited

  4. #24
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    Default Re: Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    I had a baby shower.....it was arranged by family tho.not myself. It was a small gathering of about 20 family and closest friends. Not a gift grab at all. In fact one of my closest friends was going thru a tough time and wasnt going to come cause she couldnt afford a gift! I told her not to be silly i just wanted her there, who cares about a gift.

    I think its nice esp for a first time mum to get together with friends abd celebrate before bubs arrives. Ive been to heaps of baby showers. Love them! Watching mum open all the cute gifts, playing silly games and eating yummy food.

    Just a fun day imo

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  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by redlipsandpearls View Post
    If baby showers aren't about the presents, as everyone seems to tell themselves, then why isn't it okay to have more than one baby shower?
    It IS ok to have more than one.....but people who are jaded on the subject and think theya re only gift grabs are the ones who sully the whole thing which makes the mother to be think maybe she shouldnt have another one. Most of the time its the mother worried that people will think it is a gift grab when its not.

    Im kind of confused why you agreed with my post in the other thread but then seem to think baby showers are gift grabs. I think you may have misinterpreted my post in the other thread or something.

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    Default Re: Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    I have been to quite a few that werent first babies too! Doesnt bother me at all!

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    Default Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    It never occurred to me to throw one with DS. I had people push me to do one when I was pregnant with the twins, but I was too tired to bother.

    Plus I have a small circle of friends with a large circle of acquaintances & didn't know who'd want/expect an invitation.

    ETA: I figured that if anyone wanted to buy a present they would regardless of whether I had a shower or not. Not having one removed any feelings of obligation from guests & gave me a nice few surprises from unexpected sources.
    Last edited by ChickyBee; 16-01-2013 at 13:06.

  9. #28
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    tiggerfields is offline Priestess of Kult K'iesha... Mooo!
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    Love baby showers! Love any excuse for a party or fun get-together with friends.

    I'm not a scrooge, I'm always happy to buy a little something for a new bubba, even just a little $5 sippy cup or photo frame or some useful little thing. It's the thought and gesture that counts.

    I'll prob organise a picnic or something for this baby, I want all my lady friends and relatives to come hang out and talk bubbas for an afternoon, couldn't give a monkey's about presents but I'm sure people will prob bring some small thing anyway, which I'll be suitably grateful for

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  11. #29
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    Default Re: Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    Baby showers are awesome. I love going to them and I love buying gifts for people. I dont care if it's their first or fifth baby, babies are awesome and they should all be celebrated.

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  13. #30
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    Default Re: Baby shower spin off- am I the only one that doesn't agree?

    Quote Originally Posted by London View Post
    It IS ok to have more than one.....but people who are jaded on the subject and think theya re only gift grabs are the ones who sully the whole thing which makes the mother to be think maybe she shouldnt have another one. Most of the time its the mother worried that people will think it is a gift grab when its not.

    Im kind of confused why you agreed with my post in the other thread but then seem to think baby showers are gift grabs. I think you may have misinterpreted my post in the other thread or something.
    No, I understood. I was agreeing that if someone views it as important for one, then why not for the second, third, etc.


 

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